Time to step up
It occurred to me this summer that eventually, I need to grow up. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life, Ilsa Lund.
What exactly does growing up entail? It's a complicated thing, unique for each and every person because at this age, most people are adults with one or two childish qualities. Figuring out these childish qualities is sometimes easier said than done; people are unwilling to see the worse in themselves, and attempting to change those aforementioned qualities is even more difficult than identifying them.
So what makes me childish?
The easy one right off the bat concerns the choices I make when it comes to dressing. Sure, if and when I have a grad school interview I'll wear a monkey suit, but the fact is what I wear every day says a lot about who I am. This means I shouldn't wear my, "Oedipus: The Original Motherfucker," t-shirt in public anymore, and perhaps I should stop purchasing the vast quantity of my attire from Shirt.woot, Goodwill, the Salvation Army, and (this is a tough one for me) Kohl's. Well, Kohl's isn't so bad, it's moreover dependent on what I buy there. Other shirts I'm probably going to try to stop wearing: What the Frack, shirts with stick figures, and my Street Fighter II shirt (which incidentally I purchased at goodwill).
And what have I done to improve my clothing decisions? I actually bought stuff from Express. Long ago I agreed never to step foot inside that store, not only because I found it suspicious that my local Express store seemed to hire only gay men, but also because I despised being...fratty? For lack of a better term, fratty fits.
That's another thing I have to work on. Being "unique" is a detriment because all too often it becomes synonymous with being "weird." And sure, I may be weird, or I may just be unique, or even worse, I may just be unique like every other unique person, but in any of these situations the conclusion is clear: don't scare people away by voicing your strange opinions and thoughts, no matter how much you think they are correct. It's far easier to shut the fuck up and change the subject to something that everyone can agree on.
Perhaps all of these segue into each other, because I also need to work on being less argumentative.
And the list goes on. Some of these changes are more physical, while others are more intellectual, but they need to be made. Perhaps some may think that it's a little drastic to make all these adjustments, and in an attempt not to argue, I'm going to shut up and...
Okay, I have to say something. Change occurs eventually. This summer I've had a bird's eye view of people that refuse to grow up, and I'm truly and honestly terrified. So to put it simply, I'm being proactive about this, and the reason it's not excessive is because in the end, these changes aren't really for me, they're for the way people see me. Inside, I'll always be that curmudgeon who loves to drink V8 and still dreams about one day owning a car like the mach 5 from speed racer.
What exactly does growing up entail? It's a complicated thing, unique for each and every person because at this age, most people are adults with one or two childish qualities. Figuring out these childish qualities is sometimes easier said than done; people are unwilling to see the worse in themselves, and attempting to change those aforementioned qualities is even more difficult than identifying them.
So what makes me childish?
The easy one right off the bat concerns the choices I make when it comes to dressing. Sure, if and when I have a grad school interview I'll wear a monkey suit, but the fact is what I wear every day says a lot about who I am. This means I shouldn't wear my, "Oedipus: The Original Motherfucker," t-shirt in public anymore, and perhaps I should stop purchasing the vast quantity of my attire from Shirt.woot, Goodwill, the Salvation Army, and (this is a tough one for me) Kohl's. Well, Kohl's isn't so bad, it's moreover dependent on what I buy there. Other shirts I'm probably going to try to stop wearing: What the Frack, shirts with stick figures, and my Street Fighter II shirt (which incidentally I purchased at goodwill).
And what have I done to improve my clothing decisions? I actually bought stuff from Express. Long ago I agreed never to step foot inside that store, not only because I found it suspicious that my local Express store seemed to hire only gay men, but also because I despised being...fratty? For lack of a better term, fratty fits.
That's another thing I have to work on. Being "unique" is a detriment because all too often it becomes synonymous with being "weird." And sure, I may be weird, or I may just be unique, or even worse, I may just be unique like every other unique person, but in any of these situations the conclusion is clear: don't scare people away by voicing your strange opinions and thoughts, no matter how much you think they are correct. It's far easier to shut the fuck up and change the subject to something that everyone can agree on.
Perhaps all of these segue into each other, because I also need to work on being less argumentative.
And the list goes on. Some of these changes are more physical, while others are more intellectual, but they need to be made. Perhaps some may think that it's a little drastic to make all these adjustments, and in an attempt not to argue, I'm going to shut up and...
Okay, I have to say something. Change occurs eventually. This summer I've had a bird's eye view of people that refuse to grow up, and I'm truly and honestly terrified. So to put it simply, I'm being proactive about this, and the reason it's not excessive is because in the end, these changes aren't really for me, they're for the way people see me. Inside, I'll always be that curmudgeon who loves to drink V8 and still dreams about one day owning a car like the mach 5 from speed racer.