Really Gone
Whelp, today was the day. Alex is really gone. He flew out of Portland to Chicago this afternoon. It still hasn’t really hit me yet...I think in a few days from now it’ll really sink in. When I realize I can’t just call him or text him whenever I feel like it. When I realize he won’t be at my daughters 1st birthday. I know the tears are coming, but I think they’re going to sneak up on me at some point when I’m not expecting them. He was able to text us when he landed to let us know he had made it, and said to take care. I know that he’s freaking out inside, as much as he may not want to admit it to me. Michelle says that she’s pretty sure that he cried on the plane there, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he did, when he was finally alone and didn’t need to put up that front for his friends and family anymore.
It was a rough day for a lot of us. Pearla was crying all day, and Michelle says she cried and that she was surprised as how upset his mom was. She’s always put up a strong front for her children, and now her son is leaving and I think her walls just started falling down. In a way I’m glad I wasn’t there, because I’m such an emotional person that I would have just been swept away in that tide of sadness. Maybe I haven’t cried yet, because I know that it’s the best thing for him to do to get his life together, and this is exactly what he needs.
Work was its usual, boring self. The mornings always go by fairly smoothly, but the afternoons just drag. The weather today was horrible! There were some really nice times where the sun was out and it was warm, but 90% of the day it just was a downpour of cold, miserable rain. I guess it was kind of appropriate for the mood most of my friends were in today.
Josh is still feeling sick but I brought Bella home because I was tired of not having her here! Besides, it’s been a few days so I doubt Josh is very contagious anymore, and she’s a tough baby for the most part. Tomorrow they announce the winner of the Baby Idol contest. I’m excited and nervous and scared all at the same time lol. I of course would love for her to win, but I don’t really think she will. No matter what though I’m proud of my beautiful baby and the fact that she made it to the top 10 out of between 700-800 entries! So no matter what happens tomorrow I’m a proud mama either way.
I finished writing out her birthday invitations today, and I’ll get them in the mail tomorrow. I can’t believe that she’s going to turn 1 in just 3 weeks! It seems like just a little while ago that I was in the hospital with her, having the nurses show Josh and I how to change a diaper because neither one of us had ever done it before! I’m excited that my girl is so big and bright and beautiful. She’s perfect and I couldn’t have asked for a better baby.
Well I’m going to go get some sleep and wait to hear the news tomorrow! My sister-in-law made this adorable picture of Bella for me! Ciao!
