I am a dirty rotten copycat.
Title: My Greatest Mercy
Fic Duel Theme: mercy
Fandom: Akhet-verse (Enrique and Katja's universe)
Characters: Ivan-centric, Ilya. A couple of others are mentioned.
Rating: PG
All my life, I have been brought up to see them- those on the other side of the city- as monsters. They were ignorant savages who worship the sun because they couldn’t be bothered to note the subtle and mysterious beauty of the stars. Sun-child bastards- the lot of them. They wanted us all dead- or so that’s what we were always taught to believe.
One of them seduced my older sister once. Katja was always the most sensible person I had ever met. I looked up to her a lot, actually- even though I was envious of her incredible combat skill most of the time. More likely, I was jealous of the way father ranted and raved about her all the time to the other nobles. That pride and joy of his after what a failure his firstborn son had been. I wanted to be that pride and joy. I wanted father to look at me like that- with such pride that no man could possibly have anything to surpass her.
But apparently the sun-marked one proved too great of a temptation for her. She left with him. Perhaps in retrospect, I wanted her respect and love as well. I turned to her for the affection that I never received from the older brother that was never around. But I apparently I wasn’t enough for her. I soon learned that I wasn’t enough for father either.
Yes, it is most definitely fair to say that I grew bitter. I hated the sunlings for taking my sister. I hated the war for taking my brother- another thing I blamed on them. I hated them both for leaving me. I decided from that moment on that I would be what father wanted. If he was not going to give me his love freely, I would earn it.
It never mattered. I was never good enough.
And the worst part? I was far too stubborn to ever see that all I really ever wanted was to be loved.
Ilya was that for me- and had always been right in front of my face. She was the only one who had loved me unconditionally all along. My little sister didn’t care if I wasn’t as smart as Derryk. She didn’t care if I wasn’t a prodigy like Katja. It occurred to me later on, that it didn’t even matter to her whether I was a sunling or pure-bred Yueshi. She loved me- even when it was an idiot and never even came close to deserving it. I could have failed my training for the day miserably or destroyed my target completely. It just didn’t matter to her. Either way, she came running up to me at the end of the day with a hug and a great big smile on my face.
It’s a funny world where your baby sister is the wisest person you know. But I suppose it makes sense if you think about it. She sunling? Yueshi? She doesn’t care. She can’t see the difference.
I look over at her tiny frame- walking along hand in hand with the sun girl, Isabel, that she seems to have befriended. Isabel’s younger brother watches Ilya as she plays too- continuing to explore a world that none of us blinded by our eyesight will ever understand. He seems to have taken a liking to her. And I have to admit that he’s an okay guy- sunling or otherwise. The same goes for Isabel.
It’s what Ilya does. She has a funny way of making you think about everything you thought you knew in a different light. She makes me realize that maybe the ones I’ve hated all along are the ones I should be seeking love and acceptance from. She makes me realize that my brother and sisters also loved me all along- I just never knew how to let them.
My little sister is my eyes to a world that I’m only beginning to understand.
And in so many ways, she is my greatest mercy.
Fic Duel Theme: mercy
Fandom: Akhet-verse (Enrique and Katja's universe)
Characters: Ivan-centric, Ilya. A couple of others are mentioned.
Rating: PG
All my life, I have been brought up to see them- those on the other side of the city- as monsters. They were ignorant savages who worship the sun because they couldn’t be bothered to note the subtle and mysterious beauty of the stars. Sun-child bastards- the lot of them. They wanted us all dead- or so that’s what we were always taught to believe.
One of them seduced my older sister once. Katja was always the most sensible person I had ever met. I looked up to her a lot, actually- even though I was envious of her incredible combat skill most of the time. More likely, I was jealous of the way father ranted and raved about her all the time to the other nobles. That pride and joy of his after what a failure his firstborn son had been. I wanted to be that pride and joy. I wanted father to look at me like that- with such pride that no man could possibly have anything to surpass her.
But apparently the sun-marked one proved too great of a temptation for her. She left with him. Perhaps in retrospect, I wanted her respect and love as well. I turned to her for the affection that I never received from the older brother that was never around. But I apparently I wasn’t enough for her. I soon learned that I wasn’t enough for father either.
Yes, it is most definitely fair to say that I grew bitter. I hated the sunlings for taking my sister. I hated the war for taking my brother- another thing I blamed on them. I hated them both for leaving me. I decided from that moment on that I would be what father wanted. If he was not going to give me his love freely, I would earn it.
It never mattered. I was never good enough.
And the worst part? I was far too stubborn to ever see that all I really ever wanted was to be loved.
Ilya was that for me- and had always been right in front of my face. She was the only one who had loved me unconditionally all along. My little sister didn’t care if I wasn’t as smart as Derryk. She didn’t care if I wasn’t a prodigy like Katja. It occurred to me later on, that it didn’t even matter to her whether I was a sunling or pure-bred Yueshi. She loved me- even when it was an idiot and never even came close to deserving it. I could have failed my training for the day miserably or destroyed my target completely. It just didn’t matter to her. Either way, she came running up to me at the end of the day with a hug and a great big smile on my face.
It’s a funny world where your baby sister is the wisest person you know. But I suppose it makes sense if you think about it. She sunling? Yueshi? She doesn’t care. She can’t see the difference.
I look over at her tiny frame- walking along hand in hand with the sun girl, Isabel, that she seems to have befriended. Isabel’s younger brother watches Ilya as she plays too- continuing to explore a world that none of us blinded by our eyesight will ever understand. He seems to have taken a liking to her. And I have to admit that he’s an okay guy- sunling or otherwise. The same goes for Isabel.
It’s what Ilya does. She has a funny way of making you think about everything you thought you knew in a different light. She makes me realize that maybe the ones I’ve hated all along are the ones I should be seeking love and acceptance from. She makes me realize that my brother and sisters also loved me all along- I just never knew how to let them.
My little sister is my eyes to a world that I’m only beginning to understand.
And in so many ways, she is my greatest mercy.