(no subject)
You'd think after three years in college flailing about and having a new crisis every few months about what I want to do with my life I'd eventually figure something out. But here I am, fall of senior year, high time for me to have applied to grad school somewhere and I'm still wholly unresolved. I'm stuck somewhere between law school and grad school. I "decided" a bit ago to go to law school, then I "decided" to take a year off and get a job and not be a student for a while. I'm so burnt out right now about school. I'm kind of teetering back in the direction of going to grad school for anthro then becoming a professor, but I'm not sure if I still want to do a year off. If not, I need to high-tail it and take the GRE and apply places. I'm really pushing it right now as far as admissions go since I wouldn't be able to complete an application before december which hurts my chances, obviously. I'm not really worried about not getting accepted to grad school, just concerned about getting it done and being happy with my decision.
I'm still struggling with teenage desires to be famous, or rich, or special. I'm starting to come around to the idea of being getting a PhD, living a relatively modest life with a kid, a spouse and a cute bungalow-style home. I don't even feel the urge to go very far from Charlotte. I still feel it creeping in when I have moments of "Holy shit look how much money I could make as a lawyer!" But hopefully I'll get resolved soon. I don't want to dedicate myself to one path that I'm not sure of - that's why I decided I would take a year off right around the time I decided I wanted to be a lawyer. Maybe that should have been an indication that law school wouldn't be for me if I couldn't even stomach going straight into it. I feel much less apprehension when I think of going to grad school, but I still want to make sure I pick the right subject before I put myself in for another seven years of schooling. I sort of sound like I've already actually done all these things, but, I haven't. Duh.
Also, I turned 20 and I am not ashamed to say that I can't wait for the new My Chemical Romance album.