Let's see how this goes.......
I had been meaning to start a journal for a while now, but I was debating whether it should be a for-everyone-to-read journal. I didn't want to make a journal just to jump on the livejournal bandwagon, but for a number of good reasons. I realized that I have a lot of thoughts scattered in my head and in light of seeing how it has helped others, I figured a great idea would be to write everything down. That way, they might be a lot easier to figure out, or at least more organized. I also wanted a place where I can I express my thoughts so that my friends can get an inside view of the mystery I seem to come off as. I always tell my friends that they can ALWAYS come to me whenever they need me and that I am always here for them. But I, however, tend to be a closed book despite my friends saying the same thing to me. It's not that I want to be a closed book, I just seem to have humbled out somewhere along the way, thinking no one cared to hear my problems or my stories or the such. I don't want it to be that way because it's never good to bottle up your problems or throw them aside all the time and deal with them later, so I figured a livejournal was the best solution.
I was a little worried at first about making my thoughts public. There's so much politics to the livejournal (people getting mad that you mentioned someone else and not them, people taking offense to something you might just be venting out, or having to restrict yourself because you never know who is reading it). There are some personal things about me that I don't choose to talk about often and where I do plan to use this as a way of better opening up, such things I'm still not comfortable sharing with the masses (just my closest friends and family). I wanted to be able to sort out such things and write them down without having to bounce around the actual subject, and I will still do that, but I just may not make those particular things public to everyone. With that figured out, I decided that making a livejournal was the best way to go. It gives me a chance to talk my problems out and get feedback from my friends, especially on things I maybe be too humbled out or scared to talk about in person. It will also give those that seem to think I never have a problem in the world a chance to see that there is a lot more depth to me than they may have guessed. The other day when I was really out of it about a fight Joe and I had (which has since been resolved), Meg said to me, "I'm sure it's nothing you did...you're perfect." I was very flattered by the comment, but also very taken aback. I don't think there is such a person that is "perfect" and I thought to myself, "Flattered as I am, are you sure you don't want to take me down a couple of pedestals?" I guess I must give off a vibe that I'm not even really human. I don't mean to, but this should be a good way to let my friends get a little closer look at what goes on inside that crazy head of mine.
With all that said, let's see how this whole thing works out. I plan to update it as much as possible, as things happen. I'm a busy college student, so I can't guarantee an update every day, but definitely keep checking back. :0)
I was a little worried at first about making my thoughts public. There's so much politics to the livejournal (people getting mad that you mentioned someone else and not them, people taking offense to something you might just be venting out, or having to restrict yourself because you never know who is reading it). There are some personal things about me that I don't choose to talk about often and where I do plan to use this as a way of better opening up, such things I'm still not comfortable sharing with the masses (just my closest friends and family). I wanted to be able to sort out such things and write them down without having to bounce around the actual subject, and I will still do that, but I just may not make those particular things public to everyone. With that figured out, I decided that making a livejournal was the best way to go. It gives me a chance to talk my problems out and get feedback from my friends, especially on things I maybe be too humbled out or scared to talk about in person. It will also give those that seem to think I never have a problem in the world a chance to see that there is a lot more depth to me than they may have guessed. The other day when I was really out of it about a fight Joe and I had (which has since been resolved), Meg said to me, "I'm sure it's nothing you did...you're perfect." I was very flattered by the comment, but also very taken aback. I don't think there is such a person that is "perfect" and I thought to myself, "Flattered as I am, are you sure you don't want to take me down a couple of pedestals?" I guess I must give off a vibe that I'm not even really human. I don't mean to, but this should be a good way to let my friends get a little closer look at what goes on inside that crazy head of mine.
With all that said, let's see how this whole thing works out. I plan to update it as much as possible, as things happen. I'm a busy college student, so I can't guarantee an update every day, but definitely keep checking back. :0)