(no subject)
I am so pissed right now I want to throw something and watch as it breaks, but given the degree I'm pissed to, I don't think that will help.
This is the kind of angry that only a good thrashing complete with screaming will help, and even then there'd be residual anger.
At this point I just want to sink back into the world that I fabricated in my latest story in progress. That or go to temple since that puts me in such a better mood and evens me out on a level I was unstable in before.
I don't accept meaningless apologies. Especially when there's an apology immediately followed by continued insult to the incident.
I'm also no longer comfortable with him coming here because of this and the whole "would you and her do anything given the chance?" thing. It's hard for me to say that about anyone since I'm a pretty laid back person, but I really can't say I'm comfortable with him coming and staying here. No one said that he's not allowed to visit, but I would be forcing myself from the room in which I live in and he doesn't because I don't want to have to subject myself to a possible repeat of this whole situation.
Honestly, all I want to do is walk into the next room, snatch the phone from her hand and thoroughly curse him out and scream until my throat is hoarse. I've always wanted a voice like Rani's anyway. I resist even though I know it'll make me feel better because I like my roommate, even if I now, genuinely, hate her boyfriend.
Is this part of growing up? Having less of a tolerance for the things that annoyed me previously like ignorance and purposeful stupidity? If it is, dear god this is exhausting. I don't have enough energy in the day to do the normal bout of activities, but then to have to deal with as much shit as I do, I dunno.
Whatever. I need to take a shower, that usually calms me down.
This is the kind of angry that only a good thrashing complete with screaming will help, and even then there'd be residual anger.
At this point I just want to sink back into the world that I fabricated in my latest story in progress. That or go to temple since that puts me in such a better mood and evens me out on a level I was unstable in before.
I don't accept meaningless apologies. Especially when there's an apology immediately followed by continued insult to the incident.
I'm also no longer comfortable with him coming here because of this and the whole "would you and her do anything given the chance?" thing. It's hard for me to say that about anyone since I'm a pretty laid back person, but I really can't say I'm comfortable with him coming and staying here. No one said that he's not allowed to visit, but I would be forcing myself from the room in which I live in and he doesn't because I don't want to have to subject myself to a possible repeat of this whole situation.
Honestly, all I want to do is walk into the next room, snatch the phone from her hand and thoroughly curse him out and scream until my throat is hoarse. I've always wanted a voice like Rani's anyway. I resist even though I know it'll make me feel better because I like my roommate, even if I now, genuinely, hate her boyfriend.
Is this part of growing up? Having less of a tolerance for the things that annoyed me previously like ignorance and purposeful stupidity? If it is, dear god this is exhausting. I don't have enough energy in the day to do the normal bout of activities, but then to have to deal with as much shit as I do, I dunno.
Whatever. I need to take a shower, that usually calms me down.