A Different Person?
I received an e-mail from Jennifer some time last week and she mentioned something that got me to thinking, not that I don't do that on my own. She told me that she wasn't going to let me forget what I said about my friends not wanting to be associated with me because of the way I would change my thinking and view on things. She said that I would be the one not wanting to keep the same friends. So I thought to myself: there's no way that I would disassociate myself from my current friends because of a job. I don't feel that I've changed any and I hope that those back home in San Diego feel the same way.
Taking that trip home for 4th of July weekend reasserted the fact that those back home are the backbone of where I'm trying to go. If it wasn't for family and friends, I wouldn't have been as excited as I was to move out here. They could have easily made me feel like shit for leaving, but instead they were excited for me and I fed off of that excitement as the days drew closer for me to move to Las Vegas. Every time I go back home I feel like I turn back in to the old me. The familiarity, closeness, and most importantly the laughs I have with everyone bring out the real me. I have a new set of friends here and I conduct myself in the same manner as with my friends back home, but something about this place still doesn't feel like home. I'm sure it never will, but with every trip I make to San Diego, I miss what I had. I guess it's about adaptation. I'm definitely leaps beyond the feelings I had when I first moved out here. Time should make it all better.
So I thought to myself again, would my friends back home not want me as a friend anymore if I did change? Or would they get in my face and tell me I'm not the same. I know a few people (Miguel and Irene) who would not hesitate to tell me in whatever way they see fit that I'm being an idiot and I better get my act together. Those two always seem to know how to get to me in ways I need to be talked to. But after thinking that, I thought about something else that took me back to the days selling books for Southwestern. Miguel and Ricky I'm sure can agree with me on this. They would talk to us and butter us up to the point where people were eating up every word coming out of the sales managers' mouths and changing from when we first met them. Everyone but a few of us who knew that we weren't going to change our train of thought. There was no way we allowed ourselves to be brainwashed. That's how I feel here. As much as I'm being fed useful resources that I'll need for success on the job, the only way I'm going to change is if I allow myself to be changed. Who said I can't take in what they teach me without becoming a different person in the process? Everything we do can be traced to our mental capabilities and I feel that when this is all said and done, I will be the same Hector that left San Diego 6 months ago, only with a few more notches under my belt. And if I do slip, I can guarantee that there are a few specific people who will set me straight with a quickness.
So after all that I came to the simple conclusion: There's nothing to worry about.
Taking that trip home for 4th of July weekend reasserted the fact that those back home are the backbone of where I'm trying to go. If it wasn't for family and friends, I wouldn't have been as excited as I was to move out here. They could have easily made me feel like shit for leaving, but instead they were excited for me and I fed off of that excitement as the days drew closer for me to move to Las Vegas. Every time I go back home I feel like I turn back in to the old me. The familiarity, closeness, and most importantly the laughs I have with everyone bring out the real me. I have a new set of friends here and I conduct myself in the same manner as with my friends back home, but something about this place still doesn't feel like home. I'm sure it never will, but with every trip I make to San Diego, I miss what I had. I guess it's about adaptation. I'm definitely leaps beyond the feelings I had when I first moved out here. Time should make it all better.
So I thought to myself again, would my friends back home not want me as a friend anymore if I did change? Or would they get in my face and tell me I'm not the same. I know a few people (Miguel and Irene) who would not hesitate to tell me in whatever way they see fit that I'm being an idiot and I better get my act together. Those two always seem to know how to get to me in ways I need to be talked to. But after thinking that, I thought about something else that took me back to the days selling books for Southwestern. Miguel and Ricky I'm sure can agree with me on this. They would talk to us and butter us up to the point where people were eating up every word coming out of the sales managers' mouths and changing from when we first met them. Everyone but a few of us who knew that we weren't going to change our train of thought. There was no way we allowed ourselves to be brainwashed. That's how I feel here. As much as I'm being fed useful resources that I'll need for success on the job, the only way I'm going to change is if I allow myself to be changed. Who said I can't take in what they teach me without becoming a different person in the process? Everything we do can be traced to our mental capabilities and I feel that when this is all said and done, I will be the same Hector that left San Diego 6 months ago, only with a few more notches under my belt. And if I do slip, I can guarantee that there are a few specific people who will set me straight with a quickness.
So after all that I came to the simple conclusion: There's nothing to worry about.