(no subject)
I wrote a moment ago, and perhaps at times in the past, about how I'm feeling right now. The word "hypersexual" is the only thing that seems to fit.
It's been so long since I've had any romantic interaction of any kind. I've forgotten what it feels like--what it really feels like, not what I know it feels like or what people say it feels like or what it feels like when you write down what it feels like--to kiss someone.
Sometimes I'm okay with it, and don't think about it very much, and other times it's at the front of my mind.
And I wrote of my urges or whatever, and in that split-second decision wherein I decide whether I will post something here or not, I decided that no, I would not.
But then, I wondered why.
Why not?
I wrote of my desire for sex, a desire for closeness, and:
Not just the fucking and the orgasm, but the skin-on-skin contact, the interaction, the eyes locked.
And, I guess, just wanting to know that someone wants me.
.
I'm not sure why I choose in that moment not to post it.
Then I thought of the quote by Thomas Paine: "He who dares not offend cannot be honest."
This is what I feel.
It's been so long since I've had any romantic interaction of any kind. I've forgotten what it feels like--what it really feels like, not what I know it feels like or what people say it feels like or what it feels like when you write down what it feels like--to kiss someone.
Sometimes I'm okay with it, and don't think about it very much, and other times it's at the front of my mind.
And I wrote of my urges or whatever, and in that split-second decision wherein I decide whether I will post something here or not, I decided that no, I would not.
But then, I wondered why.
Why not?
I wrote of my desire for sex, a desire for closeness, and:
Not just the fucking and the orgasm, but the skin-on-skin contact, the interaction, the eyes locked.
And, I guess, just wanting to know that someone wants me.
.
I'm not sure why I choose in that moment not to post it.
Then I thought of the quote by Thomas Paine: "He who dares not offend cannot be honest."
This is what I feel.