(no subject)
this weekend was great. on saturday i had a proper arsenal fan day, buying a rip-off jersey at the camden market, exploring the neighborhood around the highbury and emirates stadiums, staring at all the fans on their way to the game, shopping in the arsenal shop, then watching the bergkamp testimonial match against ajax at a pub with simon. we finished the night at a fancy veggie restaurant in soho and then i spent a lovely day at a caribbean festival in forest hill yesterday with emma and donal, a couple i went camping with in mongolia last year and who just got home from a 14 month around-the-world trip with millions of stories. today i wandered around the national gallery all day, bought a titian print because bacchus' eyes remind me of a dumb boy's, and am now waiting for simon to get home. come wednesday i'll be off on a ferry to ireland for my first time back in dublin in seven years.
the longer i'm away, the less i want to go home. i'm already beginning to feel nervous about getting back to philadelphia and starting over; new house, new job, new life. i've had the last few days to myself and today caught up on 3 1/2 weeks worth of journal entries. i've been clinging to simon just to avoid thinking about the inevitable confrontation i'll have to deal with at home, but more importantly to avoid thinking about what i left behind in krakow. the first hour of the train ride to wroclaw last wednesday was amazing - i'd forgotten what that kind of high feels like - staring out at the countryside and breathing fresh morning air, holding tight to a last-minute gift of polish poetry and struggling to keep my eyes open after a night spent on a park bench. it was sad, but the best kind of sad. now there's just waiting, and missing, and wondering, and worrying.
i must be crazy.
the longer i'm away, the less i want to go home. i'm already beginning to feel nervous about getting back to philadelphia and starting over; new house, new job, new life. i've had the last few days to myself and today caught up on 3 1/2 weeks worth of journal entries. i've been clinging to simon just to avoid thinking about the inevitable confrontation i'll have to deal with at home, but more importantly to avoid thinking about what i left behind in krakow. the first hour of the train ride to wroclaw last wednesday was amazing - i'd forgotten what that kind of high feels like - staring out at the countryside and breathing fresh morning air, holding tight to a last-minute gift of polish poetry and struggling to keep my eyes open after a night spent on a park bench. it was sad, but the best kind of sad. now there's just waiting, and missing, and wondering, and worrying.
i must be crazy.