Diary of a Genetic Nightmare, ch. 4
listen up, lesser intellects!
seeing as how it is basically Raxsphere's only natural resource (aside from radiation and murder), Rax decrees that the harvesting of spice shall commence... NOW
... hey, who the hell are these guys
Rax thought Rax had grocksthing technology under wraps
clearly someone has been skimming. WAS IT YOU?! HUH? WAS IT?!
speaking of technology though, Rax's superior intellect corps has made leaps and bounds in the field of gimpiness reduction. this will be invaluable in correcting that one draggy club foot we all seem to have.
Rax's gait is like 36% less lopey now!
this calls for celebration! LAUNCH THE NONLETHAL EXPLOSIVES!
okay, now launch the LETHAL explosives!
GRAAAGHAAHAHAHAAAAAAaaAAaaa
never ever EVER steals from Rax! you steals from Rax, Rax come and steals all YOUR stuff. it is only fair.
now quit mewling or Rax hit you with new stick.
... what in the name of Raxthoth is going on over here
'RAXTHOTH, RAXTHOTH, RAXTHOTH THE KING
CENTER OF THE GALAXY, MUTATION WHAT HE BRING'
oh okay that's cool, preach on broski. Rax just gonna sit and watch.
okay tired of watching
we're just gonna go ahead an' borrow this, Rax deal with you later
'RAXTHOTH! RAXTHOTH! RAXTHOTH!'
yes yes, Rax know, tell it to your chromosomes
IN HELL
Rax love the smell of liberation in the morning. it smell like... blood and lymph and mucus.
note to Rax: have superior intellect corps look into unblocking vestigial nasal passages
SO HEY YOU, what's the deal with this 'center of the galaxy' thing, everybody knows Raxthoth is in our hearts and our minds and our horrifically twisted 2.667-helix DNA (mine is paisley!)
okay wait what? meteorites? galactic core? RAX HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU BABBLE ABOUT, FOO
... Rax built boats? when did Rax build boats? Rax would reprimand superior intellect corps for jumping gun, but wow those are some seriously big explosions
Rax just gonna let the corps off with a warning. a warning that they are AWESOME and need to build more boats now now RIGHT NOW OKAY >:(
render unto Rax that which is Rax's
incidentally all your stuff is mine now, so get rendering
huh? what is this?
a strange, untested prototype fresh from the superior intellect corps?
HOLY CRAP IT FLIES.
Rax demand the production of a new prototype!
by 'a new prototype' Rax mean 'giant flying death fleet,' of course
pyew pyew pyew
BET YOU DIDN'T EXPECT THAT! HAH!
NOW ASSUME THE STICK-WHACKING POSITION.
dah dahdahdah dah
dah dahDAHDAH dah
DAH DAHDAHDAH DAH
DAH DAHDAHDAAAAAHHHHH
WHERE IS YOUR GALACTIC CORE NOW?!
now make trumpet noises or Rax hit you with stick
DAH DAHDAHDAH DAH
ha ha ha, what?
nice work with that armada of yours, Rax impressed
STICK TIME
DAH DAHDAHDAH DAH
DAH DAHDAHDAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
BOW BEFORE RAX'S TECHNOLOGICAL MIGHT
aeroplanes are getting kinda played out, though >:(
you have chosen... wisely...
see, Rax said Rax rule all of Raxsphere tomorrow >:)
ALL CRUSHED BENEATH THE STEEL WINGS OF RAX'S FLYING DEATH FLEET!
except for those last guys who gave up, but Rax subjected them to some reprimandary stick whacking and that's close enough.
THE SPICE MUST FLOW.
ah, spice
without spice, Rax would not have cars or boats or GIANT FLYING DEATH FLEET
Rax's superior intellect corps been making lots of noise about spice, too
seems they started some kinda secret project
Rax would love to know what is happenings in there, but Rax told it's a surprise.
Rax love surprises!
RAX'S PNG EMPORIUM:
