(no subject)
Good Morning! I'm feeling a bit like ass this morning - yesterday ended up being a VERY long day. Work was absolutely bananas... both in good and bad ways. There were all kinds of BS things that happened particularly yesterday morning that started my day off completely wrong and I had a hard time getting on track with my routine... which is something that is really important to me for my sanity. I tried to just take it all in and deal with it as needed without letting it completely ruin my day. Luckily we were insanely busy which meant that by default I sort of HAD to forget my woes and rock it. I had the total B team on board with me for the most part... particularly in the latter half of the day. Fielding idiotic questions on top of the madness essentially meant that every penny of the $36,000 that we did in business I felt in every bone of my body by the end of the day. I ended up leaving work at about 9 pm after going in at 8 am with both my breakfast and lunches for the day still sitting in my lunch bag where they were neatly packed before work. I never even had the opportunity to touch either one. By the time I got home last night I really didn't feel like eating dinner so I popped open a beer instead. Let me just put it out there that I'm not really supposed to consume any alcohol while taking these pills... and no alcohol on an empty stomach is never really a good plan anyway. I didn't even end up drinking the whole beer, yet my body sort of feels like I drank the whole 6 pack! Mental note - don't do that again!!!
I am trying to psyche myself up this morning to go to the gym. There is a yoga/pilates fusion class at 9:30 that I would really like to try. I used to go to yoga classes at least once or twice a week and I absolutely loved them. I eventually got to the point where I could do many of the poses with ease and I built up so much strength in my core and became so much more flexible. I think that the last time I went to a yoga class was over a year ago - it was a hot yoga class that was offered at my gym in Atlanta. That class was SO hard and I struggled to make it through but I did it! I think the only reason I didn't consistently go after that was because the class would only hold 20 people and you had to get there like 2 hours before the class started to reserve your spot, which still wasn't completely guaranteed. The class was a 90 minute class... so that meant that you were at the gym a minimum of 3 1/2 hours by the end of the class. That was not something that I had time for at all! I think that what is holding me back (aside from the fact that I feel like shit this morning) is the fact that I feel so out of shape and I know that the class will kick my ass and I will feel defeated because I won't be able to accomplish what I used to. There is also the knowledge that there will be other people in the class who are IN shape and they are good at it and I don't want to be the fat girl in the back of the class who can't hold plank without my arms shaking feverishly. Logically I KNOW that all of that doesn't matter. I know that nobody is really paying attention to me and if they are, who cares? I know that I will NEVER get better if I don't try. I know that I my fear of failure is irrational because you have to first fail in order to truly succeed. But it doesn't change the fact that it is there. Perhaps what I will do is GO to the gym at 9:30 and then when I get there I will scope out the class and decide if I want to join. If not I can always hop on a bike or a tread mill. Sold. Better go dust off my yoga mat and get my fat ass in gear :)
I am trying to psyche myself up this morning to go to the gym. There is a yoga/pilates fusion class at 9:30 that I would really like to try. I used to go to yoga classes at least once or twice a week and I absolutely loved them. I eventually got to the point where I could do many of the poses with ease and I built up so much strength in my core and became so much more flexible. I think that the last time I went to a yoga class was over a year ago - it was a hot yoga class that was offered at my gym in Atlanta. That class was SO hard and I struggled to make it through but I did it! I think the only reason I didn't consistently go after that was because the class would only hold 20 people and you had to get there like 2 hours before the class started to reserve your spot, which still wasn't completely guaranteed. The class was a 90 minute class... so that meant that you were at the gym a minimum of 3 1/2 hours by the end of the class. That was not something that I had time for at all! I think that what is holding me back (aside from the fact that I feel like shit this morning) is the fact that I feel so out of shape and I know that the class will kick my ass and I will feel defeated because I won't be able to accomplish what I used to. There is also the knowledge that there will be other people in the class who are IN shape and they are good at it and I don't want to be the fat girl in the back of the class who can't hold plank without my arms shaking feverishly. Logically I KNOW that all of that doesn't matter. I know that nobody is really paying attention to me and if they are, who cares? I know that I will NEVER get better if I don't try. I know that I my fear of failure is irrational because you have to first fail in order to truly succeed. But it doesn't change the fact that it is there. Perhaps what I will do is GO to the gym at 9:30 and then when I get there I will scope out the class and decide if I want to join. If not I can always hop on a bike or a tread mill. Sold. Better go dust off my yoga mat and get my fat ass in gear :)