Fic: We'll Always Have Helsingborg
Title: We'll Always have Helsingborg. Author:loceheri
Team: ROMANCE <3
Prompt: Bonds
Word count: 629
Rating: G
A/N: This is not me, not my writing style, at all. But I had fun with it, which I haven't been doing enough lately. Also, FYI, Helsingborg is in Sweden.
Not surprisingly, the list of things that Arthur did not like was pretty long. It included several works of classic American literature, bluegrass, birds kept as pets and cheap suits. And those were just the ones Dom knew about. Thing was, Dom had been pretty sure that Eames was on that list, somewhere below soap operas but definitely above bobble heads.
When Dom opened the door to retrieve his forgotten cell phone and discovered Arthur pressing Eames against a nearby wall, pinning his arms above his head and sucking on his tongue, Dom had no choice but to conclude Arthur probably liked Eames better than bobble heads.
Eames must have heard Dom's startled noise because he nudged Arthur back with his hip. "I thought you were going to pick up Phil from dance class." Neither of them looked particularly embarrassed at having been caught. Arthur even still held Eames pinned to the wall, so Eames would have to body-check him to move away
"Forgot my phone," Dom explained. He picked it up from the table by the door where he'd put it to charge earlier, thinking about what a disaster Arthur and Eames would be. Suddenly he blurted, "You guys are crazy. You know this is doomed, right?" He gestured vaguely between them.
Arthur's eyebrows climbed toward his hairline and too late Dom remembered that near the top of that list was people who butted into things that were none of their business, even if those people were his friends, trying to keep him from getting caught up in the heat of the moment.
Fortunately, Eames saved him from unnecessary bloodshed. "Well, that would have been good to know sooner." Of course, Dom still had to take his punishment. Eames looked to Arthur. "Think of all the time we could have saved. It has been fun, though. We'll always have Paris. And Sydney. And Los Angeles."
Arthur's lip quirked in spite of his ire. "And Jakarta," he reminded. "Cairo. Buenos Aires"
"Cape Town," Eames challenged.
"Mexico City."
"Bogota."
Arthur's lips curled into a smile, as though he was about to win the game somehow. "Dusseldorf."
Eames smiled as though picturing some particularly good memory. "I think of Germany fondly to this day because of Dusseldorf. It would have been good to know we were doomed before Helsingborg, though."
Arthur frowned. "I am sorry, Eames. Helsingborg means that when we can't stand each other anymore, as Cobb points out will inevitably be the case, one of us has to die. I'm thinking we decide it with a "Mr. and Mrs. Smith"-style firefight."
"Must it come to that?" Eames asked, twisting his face dramatically.
"It's preferable to the bureaucratic nightmare divorcing your ass would be, especially considering the number of residences and bank accounts we have spread out over six continents. Besides, we said 'until death do us part.' The bonds of holy matrimony aren't particularly binding otherwise."
Dom held up his hands in surrender. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry. It's none of my business. There's no need to be a smart-ass. In fact, I take it back. You're both ridiculous and you deserve each other. I'm going to pick up Phillipa."
Dom paused outside the door, on a whim. He heard Eames speak quietly after a moment. "I don't think he believed you, love."
"In a minute, he'll remember that you said the city and I implied, without any prompting, that we got married there. He'll have pulled our licence up on his phone before he gets to the dance studio."
Dom concluded that Arthur must be aware that he was still listening and started toward his car. Only... well, what if... With a sigh, Dom pulled out his smart phone and starting trying to figure out where Helsingborg might be.