Depression, Empathy, Oppression and a Quiz
Depression or Empathy?
Sometimes I mistake a deep sense of empathy for depression. I have always been very sensitive to suffering. When I was a little girl my mother was always suffering terribly, both physically and emotionally. She would listen to music that soothed her and these are some of the lyrics to a song I remember hearing as a child.
Eyes that find the good in things,
When good is not around;
Eyes that find the source of help,
When help just cant be found;
Eyes full of compassion,
Seeing every pain;
Knowing what you're going through
And feeling it the same.
I remember the profound compassion and empathy I felt when I listened to such things, and how pertinent it was to my situation. Empathy is different then sympathy. When you feel empathy you allow your entire being to become affected by the feelings of others. Sympathy allows you to acknowledge the suffering of another while empathy allows you to experience this suffering. For my mother, I felt emotional empathy, but also it became so strong as a child that I felt a physical pain in my body when I touched her. Her body was so badly suffering that every touch, every movement she made caused her pain. I couldn't touch her without hurting her and so I also couldn't touch her without feeling pain myself. My sense of empathy has been strong my entire life, and its comforting. Most people are comforted when things remind them of their mothers, mine just happened to give me something different to take comfort in; the ability to truly understand the suffering of others. Its the understanding of suffering that offers comfort, the closeness and love that understanding brings. Many times when I say to myself, I feel depressed, if I search for the reason, it boils down to empathy toward something, sometimes specific, such as a situation with friends and family or sometimes general like oppression. I think many people who feel the pain of the world deeply mistake an extreme sense of empathy for depression. For instance in Kurt Cobain's song called, “Depression” the abstract lyrics show that his mood is down but his empathy is strong.
Empathy for Poverty
“underneath the bridge
top has sprung a leak”
Metaphorical Empathy for Domestication
“and the animals I've trapped have all become my pets”
Empathy for Hunger
“and I'm living off of grass and the drippins from the ceiling”
Empathy for Suffering
“its ok to eat fish cause they don't have any feeling”
Empathy for Social Barriers or Stratification
“something in the way”
Those who can not feel the pain of the world are dead to the world. They are self absorbed, blind to oppression and how they benefit directly or indirectly from the suffering of others. Empathy is very important, without it, those with social power would never see clearly the plight of the oppressed and become allies to them. Kurt Cobain was an ally to the oppressed, this is reflected by his attitudes, his songs, his writings, his deep understanding, sadness and depression.
Quiz
You may think you do not have social power but you most likely do. All people are subjected to various social statuses where they have more or less power then others. We should all look at our positions to see where we are agents which posses social power and where we are targets who must search for allies with power. An ally is an agent who actively identifies with and helps targets. Many people like silly quizzes, well here is a more serious quiz for you; tell me, by the below seven social identities what is your ratio of agent vs target of oppression? Mine is 4:3 as I show below. The higher your ratio, the more duty you have to become an ally. A 7:0 person has a tremendous amount of social power to combat oppression. A 0:7 person has very little social power to combat oppression but are most affected by it. To do the quiz click on the link below or just copy and paste this table, the scoring information and if you choose the reflection section into your journal and fill in your own information.
Your Oppression Percentage
You are 48% oppressed
You are both a target of oppression and an agent. You have a moderate level of social power to combat oppression. Your social responsiblity is to be an ally to the groups of which you are an agent and to seek allies for the groups of which you are a target.
Your Oppression Percentage
Quizzes for MySpace
Social Status
SOCIAL IDENTITIES: MEMBERSHIP: STATUS (Agent or Target)
Race: White Agent
Gender: Female Target
Class: Working class Target
Age: Young adult Agent
Sexual Orientation: Straight Agent
Religion: None Target
Ability/Disability: Able Agent
Membership Category Examples
Gender- Male, Female, Trans-gender, queer, androgynous, none, bigendered
Race- descriptive (black, white, etc..) or ethnic (English, Native American, etc)
Class - Poor/Poverty Class, Working Class, Middle Class, Owning Class/Wealthy
Age- Youth, Young Adult, Adult, Middle Aged, Elderly
Sexual Orientation- Bisexual, Pansexual, lesbian, Gay, heterosexual, queer, questioning etc...
Religion- Christian, Muslim, Agnostic, Atheist, None etc...
Ability/ Disability- Able, Disabled, Learning Disabled, Physically Disabled, Mentally Disabled etc..
Scoring
Now ask yourself, in the categories where you are an agent, do you feel empathy for the targets of those categories? Meaning do you ever ponder their suffering to the extent that you feel it vividly and are therefor motivated to become an ally? If this is you your descriptive term is “empathetic.”
Maybe you are unable to truly feel empathy and yet acknowledge that the targets in these categories do suffer and sympathize, without feeling compelled to take steps to become an ally. If this is you, your descriptive term is “sympathetic.” Most people fall into this category which is a good step but I remind you of one of my favorite quotes by Paulo Freire, “Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with the powerful, not to be neutral.”
Maybe you are self absorbed, never thought about it and feel nothing for the targets or worse, refuse to acknowledge that as an agent you systematically gain benefits from the suffering of those in target positions. If this is you, your descriptive term is “ignorant.” I feel sorry for you and remind you that you are a major part of the problem and contribute to the reason oppression exists in todays society.
Scores to this quiz
Give your ratio from the above table, your percentage from the quiz and your descriptive term.
Example; My score
4:3, 48% oppressed and empathetic
Reflection
Now, if you want to learn even more about yourself, write a reflection of your observations or answer some or all of these questions about your score.
1.Which social group memberships was it easiest to identity your status?
2.Which were more difficult?
3.When you look at your overall profile, what surprises you?
4.Which are you most aware of on a daily basis and which are you least aware of?
5.Which would you like to learn more about?
6.Which social identities grant you privilege or benefit and what are some examples of these privileges or benefits?
Example; My Reflection
It was easiest to identify my social status in the groups of race, gender and sexual orientation because these are things I deal with everyday. I am white which means I'm an agent in the race category. Class was difficult because my family would be considered middle class but since I am trying and struggling to survive on my own I consider myself working class and therefore in the status of target (at least according to the communist manifesto). Age was difficult because it doesn't seem like that long ago I was a teen feeling totally oppressed by adults. Now that I'm a young adult I don't feel that pressure anymore, in fact society is in many ways designed for the gratification of my current age group. I do however feel like a target when it comes to religion. This is because I have chosen not to be affiliated with any specific religion despite my family's strong Christian background. They are not happy with this decision. In fact I don't fit any religious category not even agnostic or atheist because I believe that god exists, but reject religion because of its obvious flaws and its perpetuation of oppression. The trickiest status of all to figure out was in regard to ability and disability. My mother is severely disabled so I grew up with the stigma of being the child of a disabled parent. In this respect I was a target, enduring merciless teasing from my peers and side ward stares of strangers. Now that I am an adult when I go out with my mother I don't feel the awkwardness I once felt. Additionally I am not disabled in any way myself so I decided I was an agent with significant experience as a target in this category.
What surprises me about my overall profile is that I tend to focus on gender almost exclusively when I think of my own oppression. I am the most aware of my gender in regard to oppression because it is the most visible target trait I posses. Yet things are more complicated then they seem. Of course I take my race, age and sexual orientation for granted as is typical for a privileged group to do. I would be more motivated to advocate for equality in these groups if I was a target of oppression in them myself. Still this is all the more reason for me to focus on becoming an ally for these groups, because as an agent I posses more power in these groups then targets. It is therefore my social responsibility to use this power as a catalyst to advocate for social change rather then simply sitting on it, effortlessly gaining systematic benefits and privileges. One of my favorite quotes exemplifies this well. In the words of Paulo Freire, “Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with the powerful, not to be neutral.”
The profile of a person which is totally target oriented would look like this; a racial minority female non-Christian, in the poor/poverty class who is either a youth or an elderly person, with a non-heterosexual orientation who is also disabled. This person has no agent status at all. What of a young adult, white male in a wealthy class, who is Christian, straight and not disabled. This person's profile would be exclusively agent oriented. This would be the profile of a truly privileged person who does not have to think about oppression because it is outside their personal experience. However I believe that the more agent status one has in their profile, the more responsibility they have to act for social change, the more reason they have to become an ally for the rest of us. For it is the agents who have the real power to make changes not the targets. It is part of the condition of being a target that power to change this status is unavailable or unattainable. Therefore it is the agents who have the power to make the real changes for social justice for everyone. Something I used to say is, I want to be with the strongest man in the world, a feminist. I call a male who is a feminist strong because such a man, seeing that he is an agent of oppression has chosen to become an ally for women, something that is incredibly socially difficult due to the fact that the man now risks ridicule from other males and becomes a target himself. He is willing to become a target because of his empathy for the target. Theodore H. White wrote, “To go against the dominant thinking of your friends, of most of the people you see every day, is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.” An ally does this, and they should be commended for their bravery and their altruistic humanism.
Sometimes I mistake a deep sense of empathy for depression. I have always been very sensitive to suffering. When I was a little girl my mother was always suffering terribly, both physically and emotionally. She would listen to music that soothed her and these are some of the lyrics to a song I remember hearing as a child.
Eyes that find the good in things,
When good is not around;
Eyes that find the source of help,
When help just cant be found;
Eyes full of compassion,
Seeing every pain;
Knowing what you're going through
And feeling it the same.
I remember the profound compassion and empathy I felt when I listened to such things, and how pertinent it was to my situation. Empathy is different then sympathy. When you feel empathy you allow your entire being to become affected by the feelings of others. Sympathy allows you to acknowledge the suffering of another while empathy allows you to experience this suffering. For my mother, I felt emotional empathy, but also it became so strong as a child that I felt a physical pain in my body when I touched her. Her body was so badly suffering that every touch, every movement she made caused her pain. I couldn't touch her without hurting her and so I also couldn't touch her without feeling pain myself. My sense of empathy has been strong my entire life, and its comforting. Most people are comforted when things remind them of their mothers, mine just happened to give me something different to take comfort in; the ability to truly understand the suffering of others. Its the understanding of suffering that offers comfort, the closeness and love that understanding brings. Many times when I say to myself, I feel depressed, if I search for the reason, it boils down to empathy toward something, sometimes specific, such as a situation with friends and family or sometimes general like oppression. I think many people who feel the pain of the world deeply mistake an extreme sense of empathy for depression. For instance in Kurt Cobain's song called, “Depression” the abstract lyrics show that his mood is down but his empathy is strong.
Empathy for Poverty
“underneath the bridge
top has sprung a leak”
Metaphorical Empathy for Domestication
“and the animals I've trapped have all become my pets”
Empathy for Hunger
“and I'm living off of grass and the drippins from the ceiling”
Empathy for Suffering
“its ok to eat fish cause they don't have any feeling”
Empathy for Social Barriers or Stratification
“something in the way”
Those who can not feel the pain of the world are dead to the world. They are self absorbed, blind to oppression and how they benefit directly or indirectly from the suffering of others. Empathy is very important, without it, those with social power would never see clearly the plight of the oppressed and become allies to them. Kurt Cobain was an ally to the oppressed, this is reflected by his attitudes, his songs, his writings, his deep understanding, sadness and depression.
Quiz
You may think you do not have social power but you most likely do. All people are subjected to various social statuses where they have more or less power then others. We should all look at our positions to see where we are agents which posses social power and where we are targets who must search for allies with power. An ally is an agent who actively identifies with and helps targets. Many people like silly quizzes, well here is a more serious quiz for you; tell me, by the below seven social identities what is your ratio of agent vs target of oppression? Mine is 4:3 as I show below. The higher your ratio, the more duty you have to become an ally. A 7:0 person has a tremendous amount of social power to combat oppression. A 0:7 person has very little social power to combat oppression but are most affected by it. To do the quiz click on the link below or just copy and paste this table, the scoring information and if you choose the reflection section into your journal and fill in your own information.
Your Oppression Percentage
You are 48% oppressed
You are both a target of oppression and an agent. You have a moderate level of social power to combat oppression. Your social responsiblity is to be an ally to the groups of which you are an agent and to seek allies for the groups of which you are a target.
Your Oppression Percentage
Quizzes for MySpace
Social Status
SOCIAL IDENTITIES: MEMBERSHIP: STATUS (Agent or Target)
Race: White Agent
Gender: Female Target
Class: Working class Target
Age: Young adult Agent
Sexual Orientation: Straight Agent
Religion: None Target
Ability/Disability: Able Agent
Membership Category Examples
Gender- Male, Female, Trans-gender, queer, androgynous, none, bigendered
Race- descriptive (black, white, etc..) or ethnic (English, Native American, etc)
Class - Poor/Poverty Class, Working Class, Middle Class, Owning Class/Wealthy
Age- Youth, Young Adult, Adult, Middle Aged, Elderly
Sexual Orientation- Bisexual, Pansexual, lesbian, Gay, heterosexual, queer, questioning etc...
Religion- Christian, Muslim, Agnostic, Atheist, None etc...
Ability/ Disability- Able, Disabled, Learning Disabled, Physically Disabled, Mentally Disabled etc..
Scoring
Now ask yourself, in the categories where you are an agent, do you feel empathy for the targets of those categories? Meaning do you ever ponder their suffering to the extent that you feel it vividly and are therefor motivated to become an ally? If this is you your descriptive term is “empathetic.”
Maybe you are unable to truly feel empathy and yet acknowledge that the targets in these categories do suffer and sympathize, without feeling compelled to take steps to become an ally. If this is you, your descriptive term is “sympathetic.” Most people fall into this category which is a good step but I remind you of one of my favorite quotes by Paulo Freire, “Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with the powerful, not to be neutral.”
Maybe you are self absorbed, never thought about it and feel nothing for the targets or worse, refuse to acknowledge that as an agent you systematically gain benefits from the suffering of those in target positions. If this is you, your descriptive term is “ignorant.” I feel sorry for you and remind you that you are a major part of the problem and contribute to the reason oppression exists in todays society.
Scores to this quiz
Give your ratio from the above table, your percentage from the quiz and your descriptive term.
Example; My score
4:3, 48% oppressed and empathetic
Reflection
Now, if you want to learn even more about yourself, write a reflection of your observations or answer some or all of these questions about your score.
1.Which social group memberships was it easiest to identity your status?
2.Which were more difficult?
3.When you look at your overall profile, what surprises you?
4.Which are you most aware of on a daily basis and which are you least aware of?
5.Which would you like to learn more about?
6.Which social identities grant you privilege or benefit and what are some examples of these privileges or benefits?
Example; My Reflection
It was easiest to identify my social status in the groups of race, gender and sexual orientation because these are things I deal with everyday. I am white which means I'm an agent in the race category. Class was difficult because my family would be considered middle class but since I am trying and struggling to survive on my own I consider myself working class and therefore in the status of target (at least according to the communist manifesto). Age was difficult because it doesn't seem like that long ago I was a teen feeling totally oppressed by adults. Now that I'm a young adult I don't feel that pressure anymore, in fact society is in many ways designed for the gratification of my current age group. I do however feel like a target when it comes to religion. This is because I have chosen not to be affiliated with any specific religion despite my family's strong Christian background. They are not happy with this decision. In fact I don't fit any religious category not even agnostic or atheist because I believe that god exists, but reject religion because of its obvious flaws and its perpetuation of oppression. The trickiest status of all to figure out was in regard to ability and disability. My mother is severely disabled so I grew up with the stigma of being the child of a disabled parent. In this respect I was a target, enduring merciless teasing from my peers and side ward stares of strangers. Now that I am an adult when I go out with my mother I don't feel the awkwardness I once felt. Additionally I am not disabled in any way myself so I decided I was an agent with significant experience as a target in this category.
What surprises me about my overall profile is that I tend to focus on gender almost exclusively when I think of my own oppression. I am the most aware of my gender in regard to oppression because it is the most visible target trait I posses. Yet things are more complicated then they seem. Of course I take my race, age and sexual orientation for granted as is typical for a privileged group to do. I would be more motivated to advocate for equality in these groups if I was a target of oppression in them myself. Still this is all the more reason for me to focus on becoming an ally for these groups, because as an agent I posses more power in these groups then targets. It is therefore my social responsibility to use this power as a catalyst to advocate for social change rather then simply sitting on it, effortlessly gaining systematic benefits and privileges. One of my favorite quotes exemplifies this well. In the words of Paulo Freire, “Washing one's hands of the conflict between the powerful and the powerless means to side with the powerful, not to be neutral.”
The profile of a person which is totally target oriented would look like this; a racial minority female non-Christian, in the poor/poverty class who is either a youth or an elderly person, with a non-heterosexual orientation who is also disabled. This person has no agent status at all. What of a young adult, white male in a wealthy class, who is Christian, straight and not disabled. This person's profile would be exclusively agent oriented. This would be the profile of a truly privileged person who does not have to think about oppression because it is outside their personal experience. However I believe that the more agent status one has in their profile, the more responsibility they have to act for social change, the more reason they have to become an ally for the rest of us. For it is the agents who have the real power to make changes not the targets. It is part of the condition of being a target that power to change this status is unavailable or unattainable. Therefore it is the agents who have the power to make the real changes for social justice for everyone. Something I used to say is, I want to be with the strongest man in the world, a feminist. I call a male who is a feminist strong because such a man, seeing that he is an agent of oppression has chosen to become an ally for women, something that is incredibly socially difficult due to the fact that the man now risks ridicule from other males and becomes a target himself. He is willing to become a target because of his empathy for the target. Theodore H. White wrote, “To go against the dominant thinking of your friends, of most of the people you see every day, is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.” An ally does this, and they should be commended for their bravery and their altruistic humanism.