Lost in the Laundry - part 2
So...
With all all the changes - budget cuts, relocation, restructuring - our protagonists know nothing about each other's identities, and only know Old Screwtape by reputation. Even worse, three different sets of computer licenses operating over three different operational systems and governed by three very different IT policies has led to chaos. Web security means every attempt to access the internet requires a hack, even by the system administrator.
As a temporary measure, Screwtape has reverted to the use of transit envelopes, and Ted, a TUPE'd zombie, has been assigned to the post room. Not being very bright, he delivers an internal memo to the right three people at the beginning of the day, but each receives an envelope addressed to someone else, and of course, they don't know each others' name.
Cappucino and Tea, Milk and no sugar understand the system, and repost their envelopes in the external post tray for Ted to deliver again, while H20 simply ignores the envelope, because in his old office he "checked transits at the end of the day".
Old Screwtape's memo gives instructions - for his three employees to be at a set of coordinates by 4pm. Cappucino hacks his way past the web security to check Google maps, while Tea, Milk and no sugar uses his iPhone. Cappucino decides to drive while Tea, Milk and no sugar catches the tube to Island Gateway, walking to their destination from there.
H20 is oblivious to the mission, and at the last minute is summoned by Old Screwtape, who gets the mission back on track by escorting him to a special elevator. This leads down beneath the offices to a disused station - part of the old London Pneumatic Despatch Company's mail delivery network, which hasn't been in operation since 1874.
And this is the crux of the new era: redundancy payouts are more expensive than death in service benefit, so with so many staff on the payroll its cheaper to risk their lives in testing out new systems and technologies. Well, that's the rumour - there's never been a better time to take chances with employees' lives, and with budget cuts affecting the Laundry's ability to protect the planet, Old Screwtape seems happy to put this theory to the test.
Bundled into a small red carriage and fired down a rickety old tube with no certainty of arriving at the other side, H20 speeds through London like that scene in The Living Daylights where James Bond escapes from East to West via an oil pipeline. Of course all H20 can do is scream and complain that he's left his walking stick behind...
With all all the changes - budget cuts, relocation, restructuring - our protagonists know nothing about each other's identities, and only know Old Screwtape by reputation. Even worse, three different sets of computer licenses operating over three different operational systems and governed by three very different IT policies has led to chaos. Web security means every attempt to access the internet requires a hack, even by the system administrator.
As a temporary measure, Screwtape has reverted to the use of transit envelopes, and Ted, a TUPE'd zombie, has been assigned to the post room. Not being very bright, he delivers an internal memo to the right three people at the beginning of the day, but each receives an envelope addressed to someone else, and of course, they don't know each others' name.
Cappucino and Tea, Milk and no sugar understand the system, and repost their envelopes in the external post tray for Ted to deliver again, while H20 simply ignores the envelope, because in his old office he "checked transits at the end of the day".
Old Screwtape's memo gives instructions - for his three employees to be at a set of coordinates by 4pm. Cappucino hacks his way past the web security to check Google maps, while Tea, Milk and no sugar uses his iPhone. Cappucino decides to drive while Tea, Milk and no sugar catches the tube to Island Gateway, walking to their destination from there.
H20 is oblivious to the mission, and at the last minute is summoned by Old Screwtape, who gets the mission back on track by escorting him to a special elevator. This leads down beneath the offices to a disused station - part of the old London Pneumatic Despatch Company's mail delivery network, which hasn't been in operation since 1874.
And this is the crux of the new era: redundancy payouts are more expensive than death in service benefit, so with so many staff on the payroll its cheaper to risk their lives in testing out new systems and technologies. Well, that's the rumour - there's never been a better time to take chances with employees' lives, and with budget cuts affecting the Laundry's ability to protect the planet, Old Screwtape seems happy to put this theory to the test.
Bundled into a small red carriage and fired down a rickety old tube with no certainty of arriving at the other side, H20 speeds through London like that scene in The Living Daylights where James Bond escapes from East to West via an oil pipeline. Of course all H20 can do is scream and complain that he's left his walking stick behind...