Turning Thoughts Over Like Pages
Decent day all told. I have nothing to fairly complain about.
I started late last night to read from a copy of persuasion that I got for just a few dollars at a used bookstore. I bought it because it was so petite and I thought to myself, "well that'll be lovely to keep in my bag for when i'm stuck waiting and need something to read." I decided to read some of it before bed tho, cause, i haven't read it in a while. Like in over a year or two even maybe. (shocker, I know.)
What struck me, unlike ever before, was I am older than Anne. In less than a month I will be the same age as Elizabeth(and no, not Bennett. I wish.). There have been so many cultural changes since the time Austen wrote it. This shouldn't bother me, but it does. I know I should be reflecting on Austen having said what she said about Elizabeth looking better than she did at 19, but I'm not. Elizabeth is a pest in that story (granted one worth thinking about a lot. she's an interesting character.) and she makes me feel no better. Anne is the one character that of all austen's women, that i relate to the most. And now I will be two years her senior. it makes me feel really old. Anne somehow used to be representative of hope.
The truth of it is that if I plan to continue loving the books I'm going to have to get used to this. I'll age, the characters won't. Just it's odd to begin to recognize that they're no longer my age contemporaries. it makes me wonder what Jane herself felt. She was older than her characters when she passed away. How did she see them? What did she think of her self as a woman, of women in general then? I should read her letters. I never really have in any decent fashion. I wish Cassandra hadn't burned them tho.
Even so, I imagine that Jane would scoff at me for being like this. She'd be sarcastically funny, manage to make me laugh at myself, and yet realize I'd been foolish all at the same time.
I started late last night to read from a copy of persuasion that I got for just a few dollars at a used bookstore. I bought it because it was so petite and I thought to myself, "well that'll be lovely to keep in my bag for when i'm stuck waiting and need something to read." I decided to read some of it before bed tho, cause, i haven't read it in a while. Like in over a year or two even maybe. (shocker, I know.)
What struck me, unlike ever before, was I am older than Anne. In less than a month I will be the same age as Elizabeth(and no, not Bennett. I wish.). There have been so many cultural changes since the time Austen wrote it. This shouldn't bother me, but it does. I know I should be reflecting on Austen having said what she said about Elizabeth looking better than she did at 19, but I'm not. Elizabeth is a pest in that story (granted one worth thinking about a lot. she's an interesting character.) and she makes me feel no better. Anne is the one character that of all austen's women, that i relate to the most. And now I will be two years her senior. it makes me feel really old. Anne somehow used to be representative of hope.
The truth of it is that if I plan to continue loving the books I'm going to have to get used to this. I'll age, the characters won't. Just it's odd to begin to recognize that they're no longer my age contemporaries. it makes me wonder what Jane herself felt. She was older than her characters when she passed away. How did she see them? What did she think of her self as a woman, of women in general then? I should read her letters. I never really have in any decent fashion. I wish Cassandra hadn't burned them tho.
Even so, I imagine that Jane would scoff at me for being like this. She'd be sarcastically funny, manage to make me laugh at myself, and yet realize I'd been foolish all at the same time.