Oh ye of great indifference.
I had to go to a funeral today. Its strange, I've been to more funerals than I can remember clearly. Most have been family that I wasn't especially close to, however those too take their toll. To stand there and watch the pain fill the people I care most about - I'd rather be the one going through all that greif just so they wouldn't have to. I hate to look someone in the eye and know that nothing I have to say can make them feel better... I feel bad because there they are trying their hardest to hold a fake smile together just to say hello to another face. Still better to feel pressure of a fake smile than not have any support around you at a time like that. And then of course there are those of people that I keep in my heart and memory who have past. Those of course are never fun experiences.
Funerals in the last few years have seemed to be getting smaller and smaller in guest numbers. I wonder if this means the near end of a generation of fantastic people who have wonderful stories to tell. I've already been witness to the end of one generation... not a good feeling.
I can't help but think at times like this that in the next several years I'm bound to lose people I care dearly for. Some unexpectedly I'm sure. I don't know if I'll ever be ready for all that again. Probably not. But like the times before I'll have a life to get back to whether I want to or not.
I fear for my family though... too many people are "scheduled" to die within the next couple of years. Illness too takes its toll.
Well, that's enough of that. I just needed to vent about it a bit. Enough time has been spent thinking about such things for now.
Funerals in the last few years have seemed to be getting smaller and smaller in guest numbers. I wonder if this means the near end of a generation of fantastic people who have wonderful stories to tell. I've already been witness to the end of one generation... not a good feeling.
I can't help but think at times like this that in the next several years I'm bound to lose people I care dearly for. Some unexpectedly I'm sure. I don't know if I'll ever be ready for all that again. Probably not. But like the times before I'll have a life to get back to whether I want to or not.
I fear for my family though... too many people are "scheduled" to die within the next couple of years. Illness too takes its toll.
Well, that's enough of that. I just needed to vent about it a bit. Enough time has been spent thinking about such things for now.