Comments | adam_weasley: [locked to Mina, Rebecca, Emma Grace, and anyone else who saw him after he took those drugs]

adam_weasley

[locked to Mina, Rebecca, Emma Grace, and anyone else who saw him after he took those drugs]

Apr 13, 2008 09:39

It's stupid, alright? I know it was stupid, and far from what I should have done. I know and it was stupid and childish and I should have confronted my anger instead of being petty like that and I'm sorry. It won't happen again ( Read more... )

mina, becca, adult

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*locked firmly and tightly* boldbecca March 31 2008, 17:44:23 UTC

I really don't want to talk about it. I don't want to talk about anything. I was having a rough couple of days and that really didn't help. I AM fine. Period.

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* adam_weasley March 31 2008, 17:46:08 UTC

Alright Rebecca, maybe you are fine but I'm not. If you don't want to talk, will you just listen? Please?

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* boldbecca March 31 2008, 17:47:30 UTC

... okay. I'm listening.

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* adam_weasley March 31 2008, 17:55:50 UTC

Okay. First thing. Rebecca Augusta... you are NOT a fuck up, a screw up, or anything of the sort. I have never thought of you as anything less than my wonderful baby sister, despite what trouble you might have been having. Do you understand that?

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* boldbecca March 31 2008, 18:06:48 UTC

*tears up immediately, turning away from him* Sure. Yes. I know.

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* adam_weasley March 31 2008, 18:24:05 UTC

*walks around and sits in front of her so they are facing each other again, tearing up a little himself... why does it seem the only person he cries in front of is Rebecca?*

Do you? Do you understand that? There were many times you scared the pants off me, Rebecca. I won't lie. There were many times when I thought you'd kill yourself or get pregnant with some dealer's child. You upset me sometimes just as I'm sure I upset you. You made me wonder what motivated you, what I did wrong, what happened but that never changed my opinion of you, my Rebecca. No matter what, that doesn't mean I ever stopped thinking the world of you. *reaches out for her, but doesn't force her to come to him*

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* boldbecca March 31 2008, 18:34:57 UTC

Adam, you don't understand, and you're not going to. What it's like to always feel like a screw up no matter what. What it feels like to think that there's one person out there who DOESN'T feel that way about you and then to suddenly have that taken away. Because I know you didn't MEAN to imply I'm a fuck up, but from where I sat that's what it seemed like. It seemed like you got mad at Mina because you thought she was fucking up just like I have ( ... )

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* adam_weasley March 31 2008, 18:57:31 UTC

*brings his arms down, understanding that she isn't ready for his embrace ( ... )

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* boldbecca April 2 2008, 04:53:35 UTC

*looks pained and closes her eyes, she hates hurting him*

Adam? Things are really really hard right now. I can't do this fighting thing. I can't... *shudders just a little*

I want it. I miss closing my eyes and feeling nothingness surround me. Even with everyone around me. Even with all of this love that wells up. I still miss oblivion. What kind of monster am I? You may have your father in you, but who is it that I'm channeling? You have a reason for being angry sometimes. What's my fucking excuse?

I wish you hadn't gotten mad at Mina. She's got enough problems without people going off on her for things like this. Or for anything, really. *laughs* You made Judge punch you? That's really oddly amusing.

I never said you said it, Adam. Mum said it. People in school did too. Hell, I said it about myself half the fucking time.

I'm fighting the drugs, Adam. If I stop fighting that, all hope is lost.

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* adam_weasley April 3 2008, 22:24:38 UTC

*opens his arms for her again. His arms are always open to her, he hopes to god she knows that*

I don't want to fight either. Struggling doesn't make you a monster, Rebecca. I don't care if you have an excuse or not or what it is. I don't think anyone else does, either. You're allowed to struggle you know. That's why it's called a fight, because there's struggling. You've not given in to the struggle. In my book that's called winning. Maybe you haven't won yet but you're on your way and I am so proud of you. I have never know a stronger person than you.

I wish I hadn't either. She and I have talked things out and we're okay now. I know how to deal with it better and I know that weed is mostly harmless. *smiles sheepishly and shows her the bruise on his temple* I did. He's a good man. I think they will be good for each other.

I'm on your side with that, you know. I'll help you through the struggle any way that I can, anyway that you need. I love you.

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* boldbecca April 7 2008, 13:39:11 UTC

*curls up in his arms, laying her head on his shoulder*

I just hate feeling so fucking weak, Adam. I hate HAVING to fight so bloody hard. *looks up at him, her eyes filling with tears again* Say it again. Please? Say you're proud of me?

*nods* I'm glad you all talked it out... I hate when there's weirdness between people I love. It makes everything so much harder. *frowns and kisses the bruise extra-gently* He is a good guy. They're all good guys. Really. I've been so lucky to get to know them all.

I know. I really do know, Adam. As hard as things get, as many times as we trip over each other and argue? I still know. I love you too, brother-man.

Re: *locked firmly and tightly* adam_weasley April 8 2008, 04:05:51 UTC

*snuggles close, wrapping his arms securely around her. Someone might have to come with a crowbar if they want him to let her go anytime soon*

Oh baby, you aren't weak. You're one of the strongest people I know. You're strong for me and for Caz and for everyone you love. You just need to be strong for you.

*kisses her forehead and her cheeks* I am so proud of you. I am proud of you for everything. I'm proud of you for making the decision to try to quit drugs. I'm proud of you for being as smart and caring and wonderful as you are. I'm proud to call my you my sister. Hell, I'm proud to know you, Rebecca. I'm proud to love you.

I'm glad we talked it out too. I adore her, and I don't want her feeling down because we're fighting. I'm glad she's spreading her wings and living in America. I want her to be happy. *smiles when she kisses him* They seem pretty neat and I like their music too.

*has to work not tear up, if possible holds her even closer*
I think us knowing that will get us through anything.

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