Apr 30, 2006 09:33
Hola friends. I have returned, yet again. I must say, it has been a very strange weekend, and I'm not quite sure why. Just a very strange vibe. I woke up on Friday and felt drained and unable to get any traction. I went outside and took a look at the sky, and it seemed rather strange. The clouds were very high, and had the texture of mycellium. I wondered to myself what would happen...and within minutes it started hailing. THAT was unexpected, but not suprising. At any rate, the hail lasted for a short time, and then it began to rain.
We've been getting a lot of showers lately too, but not many storms. I guess this is what that "April showers..." saying is all about. Anyway, it has been a rather odd weekend. Just something in the air. However, I think I have a good line on a job now. I put in an application at Ozark Natural Foods, and I got to take to one of the managers while I was there. She seemed friendly, and indicated that they were hiring, and would call me later this weekend. I really hope they do hire me, because there are so many wonderful people there, and even the customers seem to be in better spirits than most. I was struck by the contrast when I went to Wal-mart the other day. I've been avoiding the place more often lately, because of all the negative energy there, plus my desire to support more local businesses. Anyway, I was smiling at the people I passed, nodding and saying hello, which is something I've been doing more and more lately. To my suprise, everyone I smiled at would answer me with a scowl, as if they had no idea why I would bother them with curtousy. Literally dozens of people, and not a single one smiled back. It seems as if no one is happy to be at Wal-mart. Everyone just wanted to get in and out without being bothered with kindness or people. At least on campus I get occasional positive feedback. Ozark Natural is quite different. Everyone, employee or customer, is incredibly friendly, and I've made many a friend while waiting in line to check out. Its quite nice, and very affirming.
Now, I can't be too critical of the Wal-mart shoppers, because I used to be like that. Walking through life in a daze, never quite sure where I was going or what I was doing. I viewed other people as outsiders, as if the entire world existed in two categories, me and them. Its a very isolating feeling, and it makes it quite difficult to connect socially with anyone, especially strangers in an energy knot like Wal-mart. Things are much different now. I know now that there is no "me vs them", because we are all the same, and we are all struggling to make our way in this world. In that way, we are all brothers and friends, and there's no reason for me to regard someone as a "stranger" anymore. It just doesn't make any sense. Plus, an unexpected smile from a passerby can really brighten someone's day, and if I can be the unexpected catalyst for putting someone in a better mood, its definitely worth every glare I get from the ones who don't get it yet. Besides, I'm still growing too, and its good to be reminded of some of my own weaknesses from time to time.
Last night Daniel and I went to Pat's with Carter and Justin for dinner and Pulp Fiction. Good food, great film. I must confess that I had never watched the entire picture until last night, but I enjoyed it considerably. Spectacular ending, and I definitely appreciated the spiritual angle.
I plan on relaxing today and catching up on some reading for school. I have one last paper to write, and I have to read a fuck-ton of Kant by Tuesday, so I should probably get started on that. I was really happy when we got to Kant in Modern Philosophy, as I had been bitching for an entire semester about all the other philosophers who split hairs when discussing the various other philosophers, all of whom contributed something substantial to the field. Kant, however, seems to see things the way I do, and focused on a synthesis of all the philosophical thought over the past four centuries. Based in what I've read so far, he seems to have succeeded famously, and most of his metaphysics is almost identical to what I've been developing, although Kant is considerably more techinical, and prides himself on his inaccessability to the masses. It sets a nice bench mark for me, because I intend for my metaphysics to be as thorough and unprejudiced as Kant's, but I hope to put it in a language that everyone can grasp. It is no longer enough for the intellectuals to understand the complex truths about existence. All of humanity needs a thorough reappraisal of our place in the grand scheme, and coming to a deeper understanding of reality, knowledge, and experience is a crucial first step in such a transition. I will be interested to discover how much, if any, Kant's philosophy will differ from my own. It seems we have sourced all of the same philosophers thus far (although I've branched out much more into some of the Buddhist and Judaeo-Christian-Islamic philosophy. At any rate, I do think that synthesis is the key in this day any age, and we need to realize that no one has gotten it entirely right yet, in anything, but it seems like we all have different pieces of the puzzle. It is the task of our generation to sift through the different global pieces, select the best one, and actually make an attempt at putting together the big picture. If we succeed, we may finally start to find the answers that we've been seeking for the past 10,000 years.
That is all for today. Time for a shower. Peace friends.