The long work rant noone will sit through...
I took the job.
For those of you who haven't heard about it yet, here's the scoop. A month or so ago, my boss came int the lab while everyone else was out and asked me what I thought about a possible marketing position. Basically, his idea is that I would spend 4 out of 5 days a week traveling to doctor's offices, hospitals, vets, and health fairs, spreading the good word of Buderer Drug. He likened it to being somewhat of a goodwill embassador. He figures I'd be good at this sort of thing, what with my background in communications oriented stuff (theatre, I imagine, was what he meant). After a few weeks of fence-sitting, I decided to go for it.
I'm not getting a raise right off, as far as I can tell, but he is paying milage, which, I suppose, is a plus. They're sending some marketing whiz up from PCCA in Texas to go over the kinds of things I'll be doing with me. Which is kinda weird..for me.
I figure it boils down to this. If it all works out, and I like the job, this could open all sorts of new doors for me. I could possibly cull a viable career path out of something like this. On the other hand, if it doesn't work out so well, it could finally be the kick in the pants I need to get out of the "drug trade" entirely.
So either way, things are looking up, right?
"So why do I feel like poo-poo?"
I'll tell you why. I'm letting other people get to me.
The person they're bringing in to replace me used to work there quite some time ago (before she quit, rather abruptly, by leaving for lunch and never coming back). She and The Troll have been friends since grade school. So I worry about a few things...
1. I'd heard the two of them were pretty much terror twins when they used to work together, in terms of how they'd treat people, so I'm worried for the "other guy" in our lab. He's more apt to sit back and take things, which saddens me a bit.
2. The new/old lab rat will likely be around far a little while before I really start in on the new job. Given all of the lovely things I'm sure The Troll might've told here about me, I'm really expecting them to gang up and make the time I have left a living hell. You would hope that there would be more maturity than that, but that would lead me to my next point...
3. Apparently the Troll found out about this from my boss sometime last week ( I was pretty much told to let him handle that part of the process, or at least, thats how I understood it). Which would explain why she's been extra frosty to me since then. Finally, on Friday, after The Boss came back to discuss some related stuff with the both of us, she finally broke. She let loose with a diatribe (as civilly as possible, mind you), about how neither the "other guy" and I were pulling our weight, how the new/old lab rat was superior to us in every way, how she really didn't care who was back in the lab so long as the work got done, how the standards were apparently much higher when the two of them started out but "I guess when you know the people who work for you can actually do the job" that there was no need to change them...
Then there was the bit about how the new job was nothing she'd ever want to do (yet somehow I'm not surprised she wasn't asked to), but had I ever thought about what would happen if this job didn't work out? Not because it wouldn't suit me, mind you, but because I wasn't "good at it." What with the new, and clearly better, person coming in, there might not be room for me in the lab, she implied.
*deep breath*
Of course I thought of that, you idiot! It was one of the first concerns to come into my head. Oddly enough, though, I hadn't really considered the possibility of leaving that hellhole for good as a negative thing. Go figure.
The worst part of it is that I've ben letting her negativity (and jealousy, as far as I can see) get the better of me all weekend.
This is a step up! The Boss seems to think this is something I'd excel at...somebody somehow saw past the lab rat, and is seeing fit to send me out to be the face of this business! I get to see people who aren't the lab rats all day long! AND...I'm gonna need new clothes! And possibly grownup shoes!
And goddammit, this is something I should get to be happy about! And I hate that somebody else's bullshit can make me feel so damned uneasy about it all.
Not because I buy into her idea that I can't do this. Because I know I can. And so do others.
I just with I didn't have to deal with the pettiness. Which reminds me...I'm telling the "other guy" tomorrow, before she can get to him. I feel like I've had to be so sneaky up til now, but if she knows, he should too.
Now more than ever....I dread walking into that lab tomorrow. *Sigh*
For those of you who haven't heard about it yet, here's the scoop. A month or so ago, my boss came int the lab while everyone else was out and asked me what I thought about a possible marketing position. Basically, his idea is that I would spend 4 out of 5 days a week traveling to doctor's offices, hospitals, vets, and health fairs, spreading the good word of Buderer Drug. He likened it to being somewhat of a goodwill embassador. He figures I'd be good at this sort of thing, what with my background in communications oriented stuff (theatre, I imagine, was what he meant). After a few weeks of fence-sitting, I decided to go for it.
I'm not getting a raise right off, as far as I can tell, but he is paying milage, which, I suppose, is a plus. They're sending some marketing whiz up from PCCA in Texas to go over the kinds of things I'll be doing with me. Which is kinda weird..for me.
I figure it boils down to this. If it all works out, and I like the job, this could open all sorts of new doors for me. I could possibly cull a viable career path out of something like this. On the other hand, if it doesn't work out so well, it could finally be the kick in the pants I need to get out of the "drug trade" entirely.
So either way, things are looking up, right?
"So why do I feel like poo-poo?"
I'll tell you why. I'm letting other people get to me.
The person they're bringing in to replace me used to work there quite some time ago (before she quit, rather abruptly, by leaving for lunch and never coming back). She and The Troll have been friends since grade school. So I worry about a few things...
1. I'd heard the two of them were pretty much terror twins when they used to work together, in terms of how they'd treat people, so I'm worried for the "other guy" in our lab. He's more apt to sit back and take things, which saddens me a bit.
2. The new/old lab rat will likely be around far a little while before I really start in on the new job. Given all of the lovely things I'm sure The Troll might've told here about me, I'm really expecting them to gang up and make the time I have left a living hell. You would hope that there would be more maturity than that, but that would lead me to my next point...
3. Apparently the Troll found out about this from my boss sometime last week ( I was pretty much told to let him handle that part of the process, or at least, thats how I understood it). Which would explain why she's been extra frosty to me since then. Finally, on Friday, after The Boss came back to discuss some related stuff with the both of us, she finally broke. She let loose with a diatribe (as civilly as possible, mind you), about how neither the "other guy" and I were pulling our weight, how the new/old lab rat was superior to us in every way, how she really didn't care who was back in the lab so long as the work got done, how the standards were apparently much higher when the two of them started out but "I guess when you know the people who work for you can actually do the job" that there was no need to change them...
Then there was the bit about how the new job was nothing she'd ever want to do (yet somehow I'm not surprised she wasn't asked to), but had I ever thought about what would happen if this job didn't work out? Not because it wouldn't suit me, mind you, but because I wasn't "good at it." What with the new, and clearly better, person coming in, there might not be room for me in the lab, she implied.
*deep breath*
Of course I thought of that, you idiot! It was one of the first concerns to come into my head. Oddly enough, though, I hadn't really considered the possibility of leaving that hellhole for good as a negative thing. Go figure.
The worst part of it is that I've ben letting her negativity (and jealousy, as far as I can see) get the better of me all weekend.
This is a step up! The Boss seems to think this is something I'd excel at...somebody somehow saw past the lab rat, and is seeing fit to send me out to be the face of this business! I get to see people who aren't the lab rats all day long! AND...I'm gonna need new clothes! And possibly grownup shoes!
And goddammit, this is something I should get to be happy about! And I hate that somebody else's bullshit can make me feel so damned uneasy about it all.
Not because I buy into her idea that I can't do this. Because I know I can. And so do others.
I just with I didn't have to deal with the pettiness. Which reminds me...I'm telling the "other guy" tomorrow, before she can get to him. I feel like I've had to be so sneaky up til now, but if she knows, he should too.
Now more than ever....I dread walking into that lab tomorrow. *Sigh*