vicious cycles
Though I rarely print out posts, I think I am going to print out 
magner9's from April 9th because is it good. Depressing, but good. And I think it says a lot about what many of us are afraid to say. Yes, to some extent I feel the exact same way. The weight of the world and its problems smothers out any hope of change. I happen to have a more optimistic view of the future, however naive that may be, but I understand exactly where you are coming from. it kind of hit me in the gut.
For the past couple of weeks, I've seen and done a lot that has opened my eyes-- the Honduras mission, a group of At-Risk teenagers in one of our programs, watched mind-bending movies, read 1984... and it has all made me think a lot. Everything has disgusted me-- America, politics, human nature, my own ego... its all too much. It seems inconquerable.
Invariably, we all have our ups and downs, but this seems much more than that. In so many ways, I want exactly what Magner is saying-- i want those 4 basic things to make my life good. But in so many other ways that makes me another selfish American. What does one have to do to achieve a life of that caliber? Does it mean shutting out the conscience? In "The Picture of Dorian Gray,"
"Conscience and cowardice are really the same things, Basil. Conscience is the trade-name of the firm. That is all."
That's a pretty extremist view, but the guy does have a point. Later on he talks about how people can be so charitable that they forget their obligations to
their Self. There's got to be a balance. is it naive to try to achieve that balance? Does balance get things done on both ends of the spectrum?
SHIT i don't know. and this post disgusts me because I say this all the time. I've probably had like 20 posts like this. It's always the same. And like Magner said-- everything I'm thinking has already been thought/expressed before (it seems that way, at least). what's special about me? But then, even that last statement is self-serving and whiny.
now i'm just going in circles. the end.
magner9's from April 9th because is it good. Depressing, but good. And I think it says a lot about what many of us are afraid to say. Yes, to some extent I feel the exact same way. The weight of the world and its problems smothers out any hope of change. I happen to have a more optimistic view of the future, however naive that may be, but I understand exactly where you are coming from. it kind of hit me in the gut.
For the past couple of weeks, I've seen and done a lot that has opened my eyes-- the Honduras mission, a group of At-Risk teenagers in one of our programs, watched mind-bending movies, read 1984... and it has all made me think a lot. Everything has disgusted me-- America, politics, human nature, my own ego... its all too much. It seems inconquerable.
Invariably, we all have our ups and downs, but this seems much more than that. In so many ways, I want exactly what Magner is saying-- i want those 4 basic things to make my life good. But in so many other ways that makes me another selfish American. What does one have to do to achieve a life of that caliber? Does it mean shutting out the conscience? In "The Picture of Dorian Gray,"
"Conscience and cowardice are really the same things, Basil. Conscience is the trade-name of the firm. That is all."
That's a pretty extremist view, but the guy does have a point. Later on he talks about how people can be so charitable that they forget their obligations to
their Self. There's got to be a balance. is it naive to try to achieve that balance? Does balance get things done on both ends of the spectrum?
SHIT i don't know. and this post disgusts me because I say this all the time. I've probably had like 20 posts like this. It's always the same. And like Magner said-- everything I'm thinking has already been thought/expressed before (it seems that way, at least). what's special about me? But then, even that last statement is self-serving and whiny.
now i'm just going in circles. the end.