job search, academic couple, stress, the usual

[fscs]

How do you deal with the stress of an academic job search when your partner is also an academic

Comments

[bex]

Oh, hello. Are you me?

This is where I fear I'll be in the next two years, but I just MARRIED my partner. To make it worse, we're in the same field. He is destined to be far more successful than I. I know what you mean about feeling like your professional life is all-consuming. In the next year or two, my husband will go on the job market and I want him to get the best job he can, the job that will make him happiest. A year later, I will follow.. And then what? I don't know that I'm as attractive as a candidate. My study area is likely a little more in demand than his, but he has reams of publications and I'm still working on my first. He has amazing contacts in the field and mine are slightly less stellar. He wants to be at an R1, top-tier institution and I... I just want a real job with a decent income. And I want a family, and I want to be there with my kids.

So. <3 You are not alone. I can't tell you how we handled it because we haven't, yet, so I'm really excited to see what others say. My husband is extremely supportive, too, and wants me to be happy, but like you, I struggle with feelings of guilt about potentially holding him back and also have (unfounded) concerns about him resenting or judging me for not performing at his level.

[max_ambiguity]

This entire thread reminds me of one of my favorite songs.

I'm not crazy - IN AN INSTITUTION!!!
You're the one that's crazy - IN AN INSTITUTION!!!
You're driving me crazy - IN AN INSTITUTION!!!

[coendou]

This looks like its from Zippy the Pinhead. Or at least the emacs command that produces a Zippy quote.

[brittdreams]

Excuse me, but is that icon a Pratchett quote?

[brittdreams]

Awesome. Mind if I yoink it?