(no subject)
What did your mother teach you? Did she teach you how to whistle? How to sing? How to hate people based on their race? How to steal soaps from hotel rooms?
What did you learn from your mother? Why are those things important to you today? I want to know. How did your mother shape the person you are? If you were raised by someone other than your mother primarily, tell me ten or twenty things about that person. I mean, tell me the good stuff.
Here are some things my mother taught me:
1. That when you call someone's house, you begin the conversation by identifying yourself. "Hello, Mrs. Stalcup. This is Kate. Is Erika home?" My friends in junior high used to tease me about this ("Duh, Kate! I know it's you!")
2. When someone asks for you on the phone, answer, "This is she," not "This is her."
3. Always call home when you're out with friends. Mom didn't care too much that I went out or with whom so much as she cared about me keeping her in the loop.
4. Don't pull the cat's tail. Though you love Toby, squeezing her very tightly is not the best way to show it. (Toby was a very patient cat.)
5. Do sing harmony in church hymns. Also, altos are cool.
6. Methodists don't take themselves too seriously; however, they do get a little stressed when there is not a bucket of KFC at every church dinner.
7. Reading is a source of information and also a source of happiness. Reading makes you think about life in ways you had previously imagined. Also, libraries are inherently cool places to hang out.
8. Having televisions and phone lines in children's rooms "separates the family."
9. Guacamole is good. Really good. It took me until I was 20 to realize this. Kira and I used to tease mom when she would order guacamole (at Cornejos, on Sundays, after church, like the rest of our church.) "Eeew! Guaca-MO-le! It looks like boogers!"
10. As screwed up as our family ever was, and as pissed off as Kira and I would get at each other or at mom (or vise versa), mom would always try to make home a safe zone. "Home should be a place where there's always somebody on your side," she would say. Life was crappy "out there," but you should always feel safe and loved at home.
11. Mom tried to apply that sense of a "safe zone" to our friends as well. She suffered through dozens of "movie nights" at our house, usually providing us and whatever friends (or aquaintances) we might bring home with soda and snacks. Then, she would give us some space while we lolled around on the furniture or floor and kept Movie Gallery in business until 1 or 2 am.
12. Plan ahead. Be organized. And worry about things. Sometimes the line between "planning ahead" and "worrying about stupid things" would get blurred.
13. Write thank you notes. Actually, she forced me to write thank-you notes for years. Then, I started to like writing thank-you notes. I just recieved such a wonderful thank-you note from Marguerite and Shakti that I felt compelled to thank them for...their thank-you note. The goal, when writing a thank you note, is to make the other person feel so mushy that they cry.
14. When you sing, sing so pretty it makes Sheree's Grandma cry. That wasn't too hard, but it still felt like an accomplishment.
15. No matter how much my sister annoys me, when the world burns down in fire and someone cuts off my leg and everyone disowns me, Kira will still be my sister. Mom got kind of morbid sometimes.
16. Share the coloring book. Take your sister with you. Practice your piano.
17. Mom taught me that teachers are people, with private lives and strengths and weaknesses. She taught me that most teachers teach because they love kids and they want them to become good people. Also, "I don't give grades, you earn them." Also, teachers like chocolate a little too much, are loud, and cheat at pitch.
18. She taught me to love food, and that food is completely tied to emotions. She ate too much, we all ate too much, but we all learned a lot from food. I have a mega-complex about food, but over the years I'm turning it from a guilt/shame/eat/guilt pattern to love self/love food/love self pattern. Also, she taught me to love Danish Shepherd's Pie.
19. It's not always easy being different, but you're never alone if you have your family.
20. When someone invited you over for dinner, and even when they feed you some weird Thai food you've never tasted before and it's GROSS, you still smile and tell the cook that it's wonderful.
21. Always stick up for the Richard Murray.
22. Don't pour salt on slugs. Even though they're mostly water and don't have big brains or central nervous systems, and even though it's kind of fun, don't do it. It's still cruel.
23. Good women are strong and have a network of strong women friends surrounding them.
That is all. Thanks and goodbye.
What did you learn from your mother? Why are those things important to you today? I want to know. How did your mother shape the person you are? If you were raised by someone other than your mother primarily, tell me ten or twenty things about that person. I mean, tell me the good stuff.
Here are some things my mother taught me:
1. That when you call someone's house, you begin the conversation by identifying yourself. "Hello, Mrs. Stalcup. This is Kate. Is Erika home?" My friends in junior high used to tease me about this ("Duh, Kate! I know it's you!")
2. When someone asks for you on the phone, answer, "This is she," not "This is her."
3. Always call home when you're out with friends. Mom didn't care too much that I went out or with whom so much as she cared about me keeping her in the loop.
4. Don't pull the cat's tail. Though you love Toby, squeezing her very tightly is not the best way to show it. (Toby was a very patient cat.)
5. Do sing harmony in church hymns. Also, altos are cool.
6. Methodists don't take themselves too seriously; however, they do get a little stressed when there is not a bucket of KFC at every church dinner.
7. Reading is a source of information and also a source of happiness. Reading makes you think about life in ways you had previously imagined. Also, libraries are inherently cool places to hang out.
8. Having televisions and phone lines in children's rooms "separates the family."
9. Guacamole is good. Really good. It took me until I was 20 to realize this. Kira and I used to tease mom when she would order guacamole (at Cornejos, on Sundays, after church, like the rest of our church.) "Eeew! Guaca-MO-le! It looks like boogers!"
10. As screwed up as our family ever was, and as pissed off as Kira and I would get at each other or at mom (or vise versa), mom would always try to make home a safe zone. "Home should be a place where there's always somebody on your side," she would say. Life was crappy "out there," but you should always feel safe and loved at home.
11. Mom tried to apply that sense of a "safe zone" to our friends as well. She suffered through dozens of "movie nights" at our house, usually providing us and whatever friends (or aquaintances) we might bring home with soda and snacks. Then, she would give us some space while we lolled around on the furniture or floor and kept Movie Gallery in business until 1 or 2 am.
12. Plan ahead. Be organized. And worry about things. Sometimes the line between "planning ahead" and "worrying about stupid things" would get blurred.
13. Write thank you notes. Actually, she forced me to write thank-you notes for years. Then, I started to like writing thank-you notes. I just recieved such a wonderful thank-you note from Marguerite and Shakti that I felt compelled to thank them for...their thank-you note. The goal, when writing a thank you note, is to make the other person feel so mushy that they cry.
14. When you sing, sing so pretty it makes Sheree's Grandma cry. That wasn't too hard, but it still felt like an accomplishment.
15. No matter how much my sister annoys me, when the world burns down in fire and someone cuts off my leg and everyone disowns me, Kira will still be my sister. Mom got kind of morbid sometimes.
16. Share the coloring book. Take your sister with you. Practice your piano.
17. Mom taught me that teachers are people, with private lives and strengths and weaknesses. She taught me that most teachers teach because they love kids and they want them to become good people. Also, "I don't give grades, you earn them." Also, teachers like chocolate a little too much, are loud, and cheat at pitch.
18. She taught me to love food, and that food is completely tied to emotions. She ate too much, we all ate too much, but we all learned a lot from food. I have a mega-complex about food, but over the years I'm turning it from a guilt/shame/eat/guilt pattern to love self/love food/love self pattern. Also, she taught me to love Danish Shepherd's Pie.
19. It's not always easy being different, but you're never alone if you have your family.
20. When someone invited you over for dinner, and even when they feed you some weird Thai food you've never tasted before and it's GROSS, you still smile and tell the cook that it's wonderful.
21. Always stick up for the Richard Murray.
22. Don't pour salt on slugs. Even though they're mostly water and don't have big brains or central nervous systems, and even though it's kind of fun, don't do it. It's still cruel.
23. Good women are strong and have a network of strong women friends surrounding them.
That is all. Thanks and goodbye.