blessings and bad posture
Some days I really wish I wasn't so easy to make fun of. I feel like if I wasn't such an open book people wouldn't know me well enough to make fun of me. If I put up a wall people couldn't penetrate me, and pick at me. It really wears me down sometime. I know people are just joking, and they wouldn't joke with me that way if they didn't love me, but sometimes it just gets me down. It doesnt help that I dont have one person who I can confide in about anything and everything. I spread myself thin, I have some friends who I can talk to about almost anything, and do talk to about almost anything, but I usually just open up to anyone who will listen, and can at least appear to care. I think sometimes that comes around to bite me. I wish that I had someone who would always listen, always want to hear, always encourage me, and still love me after seeing the insecurities and sadness that is sometimes a part of me.
On a happier note: tonight I was playing softball at the campus rec. cookout. I looked to the left and the sun was setting casting a beautiful pink shade in the sky, through the clouds. To the right the sky was a deep, clear, royal blue, complemented with forest green trees. It was absolutely beautiful, moments like that or sitting in the sun in front of the union with people I know all around listening to another friend play music, are moments where I am so thankful for God's love. It's like God's love is so tangible, I can really feel it and appreciate it, its almost like he's reaching out and giving me a hug.
On a happier note: tonight I was playing softball at the campus rec. cookout. I looked to the left and the sun was setting casting a beautiful pink shade in the sky, through the clouds. To the right the sky was a deep, clear, royal blue, complemented with forest green trees. It was absolutely beautiful, moments like that or sitting in the sun in front of the union with people I know all around listening to another friend play music, are moments where I am so thankful for God's love. It's like God's love is so tangible, I can really feel it and appreciate it, its almost like he's reaching out and giving me a hug.