(no subject)
I think I'm going through a quarter life crisis of sorts. Well not quite a crisis, that was kinda bad word usage. But alot has been on my mind lately. Alot about getting older and actually starting a life on my own.
I'm really very excited but at the same time the thought of getting old frightens me. This, obviously, is because I love being young (who doesn't?). I don't think I actually realized how great it is to be young, I always took it for granted, but in the past few months for some reason it has hit me. I'm not going to be young much longer. I'm suddenly cast out of the teenage range. Sure this technically happens when you hit 20 but you slowly ease out of it. And then one day it hits me, I'm not a teenager anymore, I have different responsibilities. The things I used to not think about or worry about are suddenly important.
I guess for some people the transition from young adult to adult is easier. But for me anyways, I just feel like I missed out so much in my teenage years. I could of had so much more fun. I should have. Am I the only one who regrets not living enough while they had the chance to? I guess I miss the innocence of being a teenager.
Who am I to complain, I'm 21. I still have plenty of time to live it up. But now I realize that time is limited, that time flies, and that no matter what I will always wonder what could have been different about my past. I know this isn't healthy but I just can't help but wonder sometimes. What if I had chosen a different school, what if I had been placed in a different dorm my freshman year of college?
But alas, I will soon be waving college good bye. These have been the best years of my life in some ways, but in others the most difficult. There are always hard times though, and I can safely say that my time spent in college has been the best time of my life. I guess the mere fact that I am almost done college is what has prompted all this shit about growing up. At some point reality hits you.
It scares me because after college so many things become more difficult. It becomes much harder to meet people. I guess that is the major thing that scares me. I don't want to be alone anymore. And having spent the majority of college alone, it makes me nervous that maybe I'm just meant to be alone. And that really blows.
I'm really very excited but at the same time the thought of getting old frightens me. This, obviously, is because I love being young (who doesn't?). I don't think I actually realized how great it is to be young, I always took it for granted, but in the past few months for some reason it has hit me. I'm not going to be young much longer. I'm suddenly cast out of the teenage range. Sure this technically happens when you hit 20 but you slowly ease out of it. And then one day it hits me, I'm not a teenager anymore, I have different responsibilities. The things I used to not think about or worry about are suddenly important.
I guess for some people the transition from young adult to adult is easier. But for me anyways, I just feel like I missed out so much in my teenage years. I could of had so much more fun. I should have. Am I the only one who regrets not living enough while they had the chance to? I guess I miss the innocence of being a teenager.
Who am I to complain, I'm 21. I still have plenty of time to live it up. But now I realize that time is limited, that time flies, and that no matter what I will always wonder what could have been different about my past. I know this isn't healthy but I just can't help but wonder sometimes. What if I had chosen a different school, what if I had been placed in a different dorm my freshman year of college?
But alas, I will soon be waving college good bye. These have been the best years of my life in some ways, but in others the most difficult. There are always hard times though, and I can safely say that my time spent in college has been the best time of my life. I guess the mere fact that I am almost done college is what has prompted all this shit about growing up. At some point reality hits you.
It scares me because after college so many things become more difficult. It becomes much harder to meet people. I guess that is the major thing that scares me. I don't want to be alone anymore. And having spent the majority of college alone, it makes me nervous that maybe I'm just meant to be alone. And that really blows.