mood swings
i hate life a lot right now, best thing? seing David today... how long with this good feeling last? not too long if it goes along with how life is going AGAIN. i have been having these horrid mood swings lately. i will be happy and laughing one m,inuet and crying nd shaking five minuets later. i an going nuts because of it, i never kno how i will feel one minuet to another! i swear if this keeps up we will have a messy situation on our hands. i have already been having some nasty thoughts about everything in life and how i could change it. i hate my depression! i qam getting started on new medications today too... on that i actually havent tryed, what a thought! the Albilify has been making me crazy restless for a few weeks now and so my doctor wants to not up that but change it to Geodon.. and anti-psycotic that has some bipolar medication qualitys.
how come every doctor i talk to anways mentions my weight, like my self esteen isen't bad enough but then they all decide to dtell me things like "you need to loose weight so that you dont loose your boyfriend and shit like that! its so fucked up! i hate it so much! i felt bad about my body aleady but now its even worse than before. I HATE LIFE!! im sooo angry!! at least on the good side i found a pretty prom dress... but it doesnt solve the body issue right now. i am gonna go take a nap and stuff before i have to cook dinner,im making french toast. bye bye for now, i hope everyone is having a better time than me! love you all.
~Abby
P.S. i have no fucking clue when or if i am comming home, i am prbably moving into an appartment here than straight in with David wherever we decide seems fit for us... how come im always the last on to know when things are going to progress... maybe thats why im backtracking so much
how come every doctor i talk to anways mentions my weight, like my self esteen isen't bad enough but then they all decide to dtell me things like "you need to loose weight so that you dont loose your boyfriend and shit like that! its so fucked up! i hate it so much! i felt bad about my body aleady but now its even worse than before. I HATE LIFE!! im sooo angry!! at least on the good side i found a pretty prom dress... but it doesnt solve the body issue right now. i am gonna go take a nap and stuff before i have to cook dinner,im making french toast. bye bye for now, i hope everyone is having a better time than me! love you all.
~Abby
P.S. i have no fucking clue when or if i am comming home, i am prbably moving into an appartment here than straight in with David wherever we decide seems fit for us... how come im always the last on to know when things are going to progress... maybe thats why im backtracking so much