נר נשמה
Damned Jewish calendar. It would, of course, figure that my mother's Yartzeit would fall on Thanksgiving. I can't believe it's been a year -- an akwardly elongated Jewish year at that -- that my mother has been gone. In many ways, I am what I am (an illustrator, a linguist -- even a self-idenfitied Jew) because of my mother, and it's still so odd to not have her in my life.
During Yom Kippur, I couldn't hold back my tears, as I prayed for yet another person during the Yizkor service. One of the other congregants, a man named Yehuda, saw my reaction and asked if I was going to be okay. I explained that I had fairly recently lost my mother, and he asked how my father handled it. I then explained that, over a period of time, my whole family has since passed outside of my brother.
"Ah, so you're an orphan," he said. At first, I admit, I took a bit of offence to it, but now that I think about it? My reaction makes a lot of sense. Even though it's clearly much later than others who find themselves parentless, it still boils down to realising that that parental support is gone, and you are essentially "orphaned."
So it feels odd to give thanks on this day, when it also marks a year of that "orphandom." Really, though, what else can you do but to just go on, and roll with the punches? I've lit a candle, said a prayer, and have had my tears.
During Yom Kippur, I couldn't hold back my tears, as I prayed for yet another person during the Yizkor service. One of the other congregants, a man named Yehuda, saw my reaction and asked if I was going to be okay. I explained that I had fairly recently lost my mother, and he asked how my father handled it. I then explained that, over a period of time, my whole family has since passed outside of my brother.
"Ah, so you're an orphan," he said. At first, I admit, I took a bit of offence to it, but now that I think about it? My reaction makes a lot of sense. Even though it's clearly much later than others who find themselves parentless, it still boils down to realising that that parental support is gone, and you are essentially "orphaned."
So it feels odd to give thanks on this day, when it also marks a year of that "orphandom." Really, though, what else can you do but to just go on, and roll with the punches? I've lit a candle, said a prayer, and have had my tears.