Goodbye Joey
Today I heard a song, and it reminded me of my friend Joey. I managed to lose contact with him after my move, and the song I heard was one that my friend Joey sang at a concert one time. He had a beautiful voice, and I hoped that one day, the world would be able to hear his voice and see the things that I saw in it. I'd even suggested that he cover some of the songs of mine that he liked for a demo, as I was that sure that he had true talent.
I signed on AIM to chat (that's how we used to chat all the time), and apparently there's AIM Mail -- which I never remember signing up for -- saying that I had a message, and sure enough, there was a message from Joey. I open it up, and it's not Joey, but his roommate.
Joey had passed away. In May.
I had not gone on AIM in forever, so this message had been sitting there for me for two months, and his friends had no other clue as to how to contact me. For two months, Joey has been dead, and I just found out an hour ago. I feel like such an asshole for letting contact slip away, as now it's too late. I'll never again hear him sing with a passion that few singers ever acheive. I won't be able to tell him how much I've missed him.
It seems that he died in his sleep from a seizure, but it's yet to be released the results of his autopsy by his parents, so I won't even be sure what took him. I knew that he had problems controlling his seizures, but I didn't realize how bad they'd gotten ...
His dream was to portray Collins in a stage production of RENT -- "I'll Cover You" was a song that, as someone who lost a man he loved dearly, had particularly strong meaning for him, and right now, that song is wonderfully apt as I remember the times I had with him -- when my mother tried to "yenta" us together, when he performed in the same charity concert as a juggler who couldn't juggle without booze ... and I remember how much he hurt trying to make it in Broadway and being told how he was too fat to be on stage. That hurt him, a lot, and he died being the "fat ugly guy," in his head. I tried hard to convince him otherwise, but when you hear it for so long ...
:: sigh :: I miss you Joey. I wish I had the chance to tell you goodbye.