why...?

[a_young_legend]

[private, difficult to hack by friends]

I should've hated her.

She was cold. Heartless, even. Everyone always spread rumors about her. How she didn't belong here. How she wasn't even human. I tried to avoid her as much as I could, because the way she would look at you, with those piercing eyes of hers... she was terrifying. Then, she turned on us,

Comments

Hacked. Also private.

[red_devil_02]

...

...this is why I hate people like that, you know.

[a_young_legend]

You seem to hate a lot of people, Asuka. It can be hard to tell the difference.

Did you ever get a chance to speak with her? Lamia, I mean.

[red_devil_02]

A little. She'd bother me about something technical sometimes.

But you know what I mean. People who just throw their lives away like that. If you treat yourself like you're disposable, why even bother...

[a_young_legend]

I used to be that way, too. And maybe, to some degree... I still am. Fighting the Angels inside things that are arguably even bigger monsters themselves is close enough to suicide as it is.

Besides, if we weren't as special as we were... we'd be disposable to NERV also.

[red_devil_02]

See, that's your real problem. Always relying on other peoples' opinions. What matters is your self.

And me, because I'm smarter than you, but that's unrelated.

What I mean is that people shouldn't think of themselves as throwaway dolls. That's what really matters. And if you do care about other people for some reason, you shouldn't throw your life away because that'll just make everyone else feel guilty!

[a_young_legend]

I can't get by without other people, Asuka. That's just how I am. Guess that's what makes me so damn stupid, huh? I envy you, really. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so weak, that I could do everything all by myself...

But then I realize that would be a very lonely way to live.

[red_devil_02]

We weren't talking about us--I mean, you or me, stupid.

...are you saying I don't have friends?

[a_young_legend]

Are they friends, or just people you hate less than everyone else?

[red_devil_02]

...

[a_young_legend]

Yeah, that's what I thought.

...I worry about you, you know. But I think you stopped listening to me a long time ago, so never mind.