don't talk about it, boy, be about it.
ahhhhhhh, school starts on Monday. I'm a little pist about it, but i think it's for the better, it always is.
you know, i would update more often, but every thing's pretty much the same. but, not quite.
i quit my job, like, a month ago. i need to go job hunting. maybe a museum would hire me, i know a lot about fine art. after i quit my job, i was thinking about just finding a new one, then i considered just starting my own business. because Jessica and i have been talking about making clothes for a long time, and now Tim said that he would market them on machete, so I'm thinking of taking advantage of it. I'm taking printmaking this semester, so i can finally learn how to silkscreen, so now i can finally start printing on clothing and such. Jessica and i were trying to think of a name for our brand, we came up with WMD. i wonder if it's already taken... we want them to be, like, activist clothing. but it has to be punk since it is being sold by machete. i mean, not that is HAS to be punk, that's just who they're marketing to. I'm thinking of a lot of ideas for images. alot of Greek statues, some Bernini images i wanna make, just weird stuff. man, I'm so glad i took all those art history courses, it's given me such good reference.
i have had some serious friend issues lately, I'm dropping some of them. i mean, i consider everyone who is reading this a friend, even if we don't talk on the phone or in person or whatever. at least you guys are taking the time to read this, you know? but i have some friends, close friends, that have really changed. my dear friend Katrina is one of them. she hasn't intentionally done anything to make me want to turn my back on her, it's just the life she leads now. she's vegan, and there is nothing wrong with being vegan or vegetarian, because i don't really eat meat. and i don't eat fast food or drink milk or eat anything with HFCS or anything like that. i like organic. i don't like anything foreign or inappropriate entering my body (food-wise).
but, with becoming vegan, it's like this whole new wave of anti-establishment has washed over her. she doesn't smoke cigarettes, which is cool and i am proud of her for. and she doesn't smoke weed, which i am also proud of her for quiting. but now, i can feel her turning her nose up at me, because i still smoke weed. and i will occasionally smoke a cig. and i like other drugs as well. i can just feel us separating. she is always telling me about how things are deteriorating. like my friends, my mother, her mother, all sorts of things. I'm just tired of it. I'm tired of hearing about 2012, and the indigo children, and the earth's electro-magnetic energy. I'm tired of it. and i get the feeling i need to move on. the last time i saw her, i felt so unwelcome. and frankly, I'm not going to go drive out to Tempe on a weekly basis to have someone make me feel like I'm a piece of shit. and i still haven't spoken to Elias. it's been about 7 months. no call, no hello, no nothing. I've even stooped to asking his friends to tell him to call me. nothing. Nada. no avail. i just want him to call me so i can tell him it's over. i just want to tell him that I've found bigger and better friends, who are there for me when i need them, who can listen to me and help ME with MY problems. oh, and i would also tell him that he is a fake artist who has to steal ideas from people who are more talented than him (me) to get the attention that he so desperately craves. and that he is a false person for taking sole credit of MY ideas, which got him into the art institute of Chicago, which he just ended up dropping out of because he couldn't stand the pressure. for years, for a lot of (fake) friends, i would be the one to listen, and help with their problems, give advice and all that. i and now, i can't make room for people in my life that don't have my best interests at heart. i can't confide in people who try to make me feel unworthy.
and plus, Christians don't really fit into my lifestyle. especially fake Christians who can't own up to their true sexuality for fear of excommunication. if someone can't even be true to themself, then how in the world should i expect them to honest and true to me? the thing that burns me the most about the whole thing is that Elias ditched me. it's like, I'm the interesting one. I'm the one that hangs out with celebrities and rock stars and has all the best friends and the best ideas and the best insight, and he ditches my ass. i just don't understand that logic. i mean, with all my connections, even a bad friend would be friends with me just to get to who i know. i think it just burns, and i know that I'm being a bitter ass bitch about it, but i have no mercy for those who are false to me. none. and why should i?
in other news, halo 3 comes out on September 25th. i hope school goes by fast.
you know, i would update more often, but every thing's pretty much the same. but, not quite.
i quit my job, like, a month ago. i need to go job hunting. maybe a museum would hire me, i know a lot about fine art. after i quit my job, i was thinking about just finding a new one, then i considered just starting my own business. because Jessica and i have been talking about making clothes for a long time, and now Tim said that he would market them on machete, so I'm thinking of taking advantage of it. I'm taking printmaking this semester, so i can finally learn how to silkscreen, so now i can finally start printing on clothing and such. Jessica and i were trying to think of a name for our brand, we came up with WMD. i wonder if it's already taken... we want them to be, like, activist clothing. but it has to be punk since it is being sold by machete. i mean, not that is HAS to be punk, that's just who they're marketing to. I'm thinking of a lot of ideas for images. alot of Greek statues, some Bernini images i wanna make, just weird stuff. man, I'm so glad i took all those art history courses, it's given me such good reference.
i have had some serious friend issues lately, I'm dropping some of them. i mean, i consider everyone who is reading this a friend, even if we don't talk on the phone or in person or whatever. at least you guys are taking the time to read this, you know? but i have some friends, close friends, that have really changed. my dear friend Katrina is one of them. she hasn't intentionally done anything to make me want to turn my back on her, it's just the life she leads now. she's vegan, and there is nothing wrong with being vegan or vegetarian, because i don't really eat meat. and i don't eat fast food or drink milk or eat anything with HFCS or anything like that. i like organic. i don't like anything foreign or inappropriate entering my body (food-wise).
but, with becoming vegan, it's like this whole new wave of anti-establishment has washed over her. she doesn't smoke cigarettes, which is cool and i am proud of her for. and she doesn't smoke weed, which i am also proud of her for quiting. but now, i can feel her turning her nose up at me, because i still smoke weed. and i will occasionally smoke a cig. and i like other drugs as well. i can just feel us separating. she is always telling me about how things are deteriorating. like my friends, my mother, her mother, all sorts of things. I'm just tired of it. I'm tired of hearing about 2012, and the indigo children, and the earth's electro-magnetic energy. I'm tired of it. and i get the feeling i need to move on. the last time i saw her, i felt so unwelcome. and frankly, I'm not going to go drive out to Tempe on a weekly basis to have someone make me feel like I'm a piece of shit. and i still haven't spoken to Elias. it's been about 7 months. no call, no hello, no nothing. I've even stooped to asking his friends to tell him to call me. nothing. Nada. no avail. i just want him to call me so i can tell him it's over. i just want to tell him that I've found bigger and better friends, who are there for me when i need them, who can listen to me and help ME with MY problems. oh, and i would also tell him that he is a fake artist who has to steal ideas from people who are more talented than him (me) to get the attention that he so desperately craves. and that he is a false person for taking sole credit of MY ideas, which got him into the art institute of Chicago, which he just ended up dropping out of because he couldn't stand the pressure. for years, for a lot of (fake) friends, i would be the one to listen, and help with their problems, give advice and all that. i and now, i can't make room for people in my life that don't have my best interests at heart. i can't confide in people who try to make me feel unworthy.
and plus, Christians don't really fit into my lifestyle. especially fake Christians who can't own up to their true sexuality for fear of excommunication. if someone can't even be true to themself, then how in the world should i expect them to honest and true to me? the thing that burns me the most about the whole thing is that Elias ditched me. it's like, I'm the interesting one. I'm the one that hangs out with celebrities and rock stars and has all the best friends and the best ideas and the best insight, and he ditches my ass. i just don't understand that logic. i mean, with all my connections, even a bad friend would be friends with me just to get to who i know. i think it just burns, and i know that I'm being a bitter ass bitch about it, but i have no mercy for those who are false to me. none. and why should i?
in other news, halo 3 comes out on September 25th. i hope school goes by fast.