Now's the time...
My first post in ages and it's probably gonna be a long one. I need to get this off my chest and who knows, you guys may have your own opinions and advice for me about it. I don't mind if you don't read the whole thing but at least skim through it if you have the time please. I'm gonna talk about something I haven't really talked a lot about. In
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Puggs has pretty much covered the money issue seeing as money is his area. Mines is in the medical side so i'll cover that :P
Anxiety is a bitch if ye can't get it under control. It's a lot more debilitating than people believe, especially if they've never suffered it. Ye wouldn't believe the states people get themselves into before coming in to theatre, and that's only short-term! Even though I've never suffered long-term anxiety I can empathise with ye. I can see how it'd affect ye on a day to day basis and things.
Keep taking yer beta-blockers regularly. ! Not just when ye feel it flaring up or anything, ye'll soon notice the effects of them.
And the depression issue, a lot of people don't like hearing they have it, can't come to terms with it n stuff specially as it has a bit of stigma about it. It may just be a mild depression ye have, but if nothing else has worked or ye aren't interested in other methods to combat it (e.g. counselling etc) then taking meds might be the problem solver :) are you on stuff specifically for depression like citalopram or anything? If so don't just suddenly stop taking them it'll only make ye worse. If ye are on meds n wanna come off them eventually, ye gotta see yer Dr and gradually reduce yer dosage.
As for the college/job situation, once yer medical issues are sorted you'll find it easier to get into college etc. A little bit each day like actually making it to college might seem trivial to other people but to you it's a big thing so just keep on top of it. Push yourself a little bit each day. Might seem a bit scary but once ye've done it ye'll be like yus!! :P
On the love life side of things, I bet it'll happen when ye least expect it :) trying to find someone is always difficult, like if ye set yer mind to it, it never seems to happen. Ye'll probably have someone who ye'd never expect to be with and it'll develop. When it does happen don't freak out and run off, chances are she's feeling the same most of the time. Don't look on the scary side of things "will she like me" "why the fuck is she with me" things like that. Just enjoy whats going on and chillax about it. No need to rush into things with anyone and stuff ye've got looooadsa time to get serious and settle down.
My advice probably wont help, but I like to think i've tried haha. I've not seen ye in about....15 years :p but ye know i'm only a 10 minute walk or a phonecall away if ye need a wee chat.
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The depression part isn't that bad, it's really only just started and it's mainly because of the anxiety and the effect it's having on me. I got some citalopram but I haven't started taking it and I'm not too sure I want to now that I'm on the beta-blockers (don't really feel too comfortable mixing anything). I figure once everything in my life is a little more stable and once I feel I have complete control over this anxiety, the depression will fade.
I'm seeing a counsellor every week and have been for a good few months but it's just got to the point where I need that something extra to help control it, especially the physical symptoms so the beta-blockers are certainly coming in handy. I just need to remember to take them :P
Your advice does help and thanks for it :) I'll make sure I let you know how I'm feeling once I've got through this first course of meds and that.
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