Another One
Another bad day... I seem to be getting a lot of those lately...
I guess I should clarify-- I had a pretty good day except for the fact that a certain ex-boyfriend now hates me. He always told me that he knew me better than I knew myself and so now that he's calling me all these horrible things, it's hard to not listen to him and think its true. My self image is now pretty screwed up and I'm walking around feeling like I'm a really bad person and not quite understranding how or why.
But all of this is my fault; I know its my fault. I am a liar, and I deserve these bad times because I brought them on myself. But that does not mean that a certain ex-boyfriend can call me a slut because I kissed another guy. Yeah, so I didn't tell him at first. I knew it would hurt, plus, honestly, maybe its none of his business anymore. We are not together and I can kiss anyone I want. I can act like a slut and guess what, all he can do about it is be happy that we aren't together anymore. So great, he sees me for who i am, a lying slut, and he's happy that our 14 month relationship is over. No more verbal abuse, please.
That was the bad part... now for the little good parts that have kept me alive through-out the day: I now am starting to finally understand some key concepts in my Chemistry class. I've been going insane in there because I'm being thrown all this information and can't seem to absorb it. After realizing I'm going to have to actually work in there, I'm starting to understand, and its a wonderful feeling. I am such a nerd.
Second good thing-- I talked to a certain cool teacher today in school about my place of employment and asked why he doesn't come to see Ashley and myself there. He claimed he doesn't come because he would make a habit of it, and that is a valid concern; yet, to my surprise, he came tonight to see us, and that was neato. I wonder what ice cream he got.
Third good thing: all the wonderful people at my place of employment bashing my ex-boyfriend's name and, in doing so, making me feel much better. Love to the Brusters girls.
I guess I should clarify-- I had a pretty good day except for the fact that a certain ex-boyfriend now hates me. He always told me that he knew me better than I knew myself and so now that he's calling me all these horrible things, it's hard to not listen to him and think its true. My self image is now pretty screwed up and I'm walking around feeling like I'm a really bad person and not quite understranding how or why.
But all of this is my fault; I know its my fault. I am a liar, and I deserve these bad times because I brought them on myself. But that does not mean that a certain ex-boyfriend can call me a slut because I kissed another guy. Yeah, so I didn't tell him at first. I knew it would hurt, plus, honestly, maybe its none of his business anymore. We are not together and I can kiss anyone I want. I can act like a slut and guess what, all he can do about it is be happy that we aren't together anymore. So great, he sees me for who i am, a lying slut, and he's happy that our 14 month relationship is over. No more verbal abuse, please.
That was the bad part... now for the little good parts that have kept me alive through-out the day: I now am starting to finally understand some key concepts in my Chemistry class. I've been going insane in there because I'm being thrown all this information and can't seem to absorb it. After realizing I'm going to have to actually work in there, I'm starting to understand, and its a wonderful feeling. I am such a nerd.
Second good thing-- I talked to a certain cool teacher today in school about my place of employment and asked why he doesn't come to see Ashley and myself there. He claimed he doesn't come because he would make a habit of it, and that is a valid concern; yet, to my surprise, he came tonight to see us, and that was neato. I wonder what ice cream he got.
Third good thing: all the wonderful people at my place of employment bashing my ex-boyfriend's name and, in doing so, making me feel much better. Love to the Brusters girls.