take two....or 1 1/2
i made a new journal to do things different.
i told everyone big things so i would do things different.
i dress different.
i look different.
but all my differences are in the exact same was as everything i want to be running from/changing.
maybe you need something more than the internet, more than the rumours, more than the will to change. i guess, i wouldn't know.
it's not even that i lack the will for anything. frankly, i don't care.
if i'm reading a book with pages missing, what's the point in starting?
there's nothing i want to change really about myself. i'm not the problem here anymore. i just want to make everyone else make sense or grow a fucking spine.
i missed you even before i met you. i'm not being vague, i'm pretty obvious.
i decided i don't believe in low self esteem, i believe in it's just yer enviroment.
in hiding, the world spins faster without me and i still get into the same squabbles
even if i'm not around. tell me how?
i hate small towns and small town people
and everything not being constant.
only dadaism, nihilism and big books make sense.
and if that's all i got, fuck it, that's all i want. everyone else/everything else can fuck off.
i can't avoid drama by not participating or being logical or honest or confrontational. people are too bored in this town and there's no communication cause no one talks anymore, to paraphrade defiance,ohio.
i'm not sure of anything but if i was, i'd be sure that's not a good way to be.
sharpie tattoos and vegan food and shared songs and matching nofx shirts and beatles over beach boys and john lennon and favorite albums and rancid sing a longs/insults and a love of studded belts and i'll be yer mirror, please?
i told everyone big things so i would do things different.
i dress different.
i look different.
but all my differences are in the exact same was as everything i want to be running from/changing.
maybe you need something more than the internet, more than the rumours, more than the will to change. i guess, i wouldn't know.
it's not even that i lack the will for anything. frankly, i don't care.
if i'm reading a book with pages missing, what's the point in starting?
there's nothing i want to change really about myself. i'm not the problem here anymore. i just want to make everyone else make sense or grow a fucking spine.
i missed you even before i met you. i'm not being vague, i'm pretty obvious.
i decided i don't believe in low self esteem, i believe in it's just yer enviroment.
in hiding, the world spins faster without me and i still get into the same squabbles
even if i'm not around. tell me how?
i hate small towns and small town people
and everything not being constant.
only dadaism, nihilism and big books make sense.
and if that's all i got, fuck it, that's all i want. everyone else/everything else can fuck off.
i can't avoid drama by not participating or being logical or honest or confrontational. people are too bored in this town and there's no communication cause no one talks anymore, to paraphrade defiance,ohio.
i'm not sure of anything but if i was, i'd be sure that's not a good way to be.
sharpie tattoos and vegan food and shared songs and matching nofx shirts and beatles over beach boys and john lennon and favorite albums and rancid sing a longs/insults and a love of studded belts and i'll be yer mirror, please?