Marlow slipped on a pair of moccasins and grabbed a long sweater from her wardrobe before heading out of Flamel Hall. The trek to Tracey's dorm wasn't long, but the weather had become so bitterly cold.
Fifteen minutes later and she was knocking on Tracey's door. She only hoped Nott wasn't around.
Marlow should have been expecting it. After all these years, and after their many shared heart to hearts, she should have seen it coming. But, like always, Marlow's eyes widened and a grin broke out on her face as Tracey nearly tackled her to the ground.
"Merlin, you think you'd be happier to see me," she mused before hugging her friend back tightly. "Now, what in the world is going on?"
"Inside, quickly," Tracey said, wrenching herself away from Marlow. She took her wrist and yanked her into the room and shut the door behind them, leaning against it. Marlow spun on the spot, looking a little dizzy from the sudden forced entrance into Tracey's dorm room.
"Well, first off, Miles and I easily could have had sex the other night, but I stopped it the moment he tried to get under my clothes. I couldn't stop the kissing because I just... I couldn't figure out where my mind had went, and muscle memory kicked in, and want and need and all those stupid things... then I wound up on this here desk-" She pointed at the desk under her loft bed. "And then I pushed him away with my knees and he was all mad and left."
Tracey stopped to catch her breath.
"And, I kind of met someone, but that's all I can really say about that, because I don't want to jinx it, and don't really know how... he feels about me."
An easy lie. She needed to pretend she met a boy her age. She needed to get a little off her chest, but she'd lie. No big deal
It was certainly quite a lot of information to take in all at once. She stood there, not moving for a moment. Then she scratched behind her ear, an eyebrow raising slightly. The situation with Miles wasn't incredibly new. No, no matter what, those two were constantly going through something. Together, or not. But this new one.
"I'm proud of you," she said. "Pushing Miles away like that. I bet it wasn't very easy."
And she knew it probably wasn't. Even though Marlow and Miles were very close, she knew the boy wasn't easy when it came to relationships. She wandered over to Tracey's desk and plopped herself down in the desk chair.
"He's a year above us, and in my Transfiguration class, but that's all you're going to get unless something of importance happens... like him asking me out or something," Tracey lied easily. "But he's very handsome and very sweet and... incredibly like Miles, but he lets me in, and it's so refreshing."
Tracey sat down at Marlow's feet, resting her chin on Marlow's knees. She looked up at her, her eyes shining, though her heart was ripping in half at the thought of what she was about to say next.
"I don't want to hurt this new guy. At all. But Miles came back right when this started, and I always go back to Miles somehow. I just feel like Miles is the one, Marlow. And I am so insanely in love with him even after not seeing him for a year. I wanted him to do me against the wall on this desk but I didn't want to be so easy. I wanted him to apologize for leaving and explain. I want him to tell me he loves me and make it better. I don't know what to do. Who do I choose? The new guy, who is incredibly sweet and sexy... or the guy I know
( ... )
"To be honest, I don't know why you're debating this," she told her rather suddenly.
She knew Tracey. Almost better than she knew anyone else. She understood what her and Miles had been though over the past couple of years. It had always been slightly frustrating, trying to figure out what their issues were - but she knew there was no point. They would only be able to work out their issues on their own.
"You're in love with Miles," she said, subconsciously raking her fingers through Tracey's hair. "And no matter how great this new guy is - you're still going to be thinking of Miles."
"But why?" Tracey asked Marlow, her bubble bursting but her heart piecing together all at once. Why did it always have to be this way?
They could never be together. They would last about seven months, something bad would happen, he would leave. She would cry and meet someone else and happiness would seemingly be in reach, and he would come back. She would break the heart of said new person, they would last about seven months, repeat.
"How can he be the guy I'm supposed to end up with if we can't even stay together, and he can't trust me enough to tell me why he's always leaving me? I can't trust someone completely if I'm afraid they're going to leave me without warning."
Tracey smiled at the thought of Audrik.
"This new guy... he doesn't do that. He lets me in. He tells me how he feels. He doesn't tell anyone else, like Miles, but he tells me. And he warns me if it might be bad. If Miles could do that I could easily be with him for the rest of my life."
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Whatcha gonna do to stop me?
In very non-sexual ways, please.
Because sex would be awkward.
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But um, don't make me come over there and lock you in your room to keep you from leaving!
...
You scared?
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I do, too. That's freaky.
Terrified.
But only if you lock yourself in here with me.
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Bet it's the same person.
Want me to come by? Or do you want to come here?
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You come here? :)
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I'll be there in a moment.
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:) Yay!
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Fifteen minutes later and she was knocking on Tracey's door. She only hoped Nott wasn't around.
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"Marlowww!!!" She screamed, tackle glomping the very cold girl into the door frame.
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"Merlin, you think you'd be happier to see me," she mused before hugging her friend back tightly. "Now, what in the world is going on?"
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"Well, first off, Miles and I easily could have had sex the other night, but I stopped it the moment he tried to get under my clothes. I couldn't stop the kissing because I just... I couldn't figure out where my mind had went, and muscle memory kicked in, and want and need and all those stupid things... then I wound up on this here desk-" She pointed at the desk under her loft bed. "And then I pushed him away with my knees and he was all mad and left."
Tracey stopped to catch her breath.
"And, I kind of met someone, but that's all I can really say about that, because I don't want to jinx it, and don't really know how... he feels about me."
An easy lie. She needed to pretend she met a boy her age. She needed to get a little off her chest, but she'd lie. No big deal
Reply
It was certainly quite a lot of information to take in all at once. She stood there, not moving for a moment. Then she scratched behind her ear, an eyebrow raising slightly. The situation with Miles wasn't incredibly new. No, no matter what, those two were constantly going through something. Together, or not. But this new one.
"I'm proud of you," she said. "Pushing Miles away like that. I bet it wasn't very easy."
And she knew it probably wasn't. Even though Marlow and Miles were very close, she knew the boy wasn't easy when it came to relationships. She wandered over to Tracey's desk and plopped herself down in the desk chair.
"So who's this bloke? He go here?"
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Tracey sat down at Marlow's feet, resting her chin on Marlow's knees. She looked up at her, her eyes shining, though her heart was ripping in half at the thought of what she was about to say next.
"I don't want to hurt this new guy. At all. But Miles came back right when this started, and I always go back to Miles somehow. I just feel like Miles is the one, Marlow. And I am so insanely in love with him even after not seeing him for a year. I wanted him to do me against the wall on this desk but I didn't want to be so easy. I wanted him to apologize for leaving and explain. I want him to tell me he loves me and make it better. I don't know what to do. Who do I choose? The new guy, who is incredibly sweet and sexy... or the guy I know ( ... )
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She knew Tracey. Almost better than she knew anyone else. She understood what her and Miles had been though over the past couple of years. It had always been slightly frustrating, trying to figure out what their issues were - but she knew there was no point. They would only be able to work out their issues on their own.
"You're in love with Miles," she said, subconsciously raking her fingers through Tracey's hair. "And no matter how great this new guy is - you're still going to be thinking of Miles."
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They could never be together. They would last about seven months, something bad would happen, he would leave. She would cry and meet someone else and happiness would seemingly be in reach, and he would come back. She would break the heart of said new person, they would last about seven months, repeat.
"How can he be the guy I'm supposed to end up with if we can't even stay together, and he can't trust me enough to tell me why he's always leaving me? I can't trust someone completely if I'm afraid they're going to leave me without warning."
Tracey smiled at the thought of Audrik.
"This new guy... he doesn't do that. He lets me in. He tells me how he feels. He doesn't tell anyone else, like Miles, but he tells me. And he warns me if it might be bad. If Miles could do that I could easily be with him for the rest of my life."
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