She's just that into you.
I think I'm doing a good job of pretending this isn't getting to me. It is, but I have no right to complain. I got what I wanted, and my boyfriend is alive and well. Adapting to suit his needs a little better is the least I can do to make up for getting him killed. I think after everything that happened, its what I owe him. Some peace and quiet
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I'll have to remind him that its a little bit of a problem for me. I mean, what else can I do? Its a really stupid thing to be annoyed over, and I know that. After what happened, I'm more than aware that there are some things in life that are just not worth fighting over, and that's definitely in the categ--
What the fuck?!
No. No, really. I want to know what the fuck my boyfriend thinks he's doing here! I'm studying. I'm busy. Very busy. Its pretty obvious to me that he sees me being busy. So what's with the...
I can't take this. I can't. I mean, oh god, he's fucking singing it too.
"And I know the night is fading, and I know the time's gonna fly, and I'm never gonna tell you everything I gotta tell you, but I know I gotta give it a try..."That sad part of this is how much I like his voice too. I'll be the first to admit that Sam isn't going to win any Grammys in the near future, but ( ... )
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"Yeah?" I walked out of the kitchen, and saw the look on her face. It's driving her nuts. I knew this had to do it. I kept humming along while drinking the soda.
"Can you please turn that down? I'm trying to go over a few things for class tomorrow."But if I turn it down, it's not going to piss you off as much ( ... )
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Okay, problem solved. I got a little too upset too soon with that one. All I had to do was ask. Good. Because I've been trying so hard with all of this, I'd hate to snap at him over one small thing. I guess one of the big problems before was that I'd get angry right away, and not communicate. When I calmly tell him something's bothering me, Sam isn't going to keep it up intentionally. He's not that kind of guy. Not spiteful like that, or--
"But I don't know how to leave you, and I'll never let you fall... I don't know how you do it, making love out of nothing at all..."
...That isn't good enough! Son of a bitch!
I thew my notebook on the table and got up, stalking into the bedroom. So much for communication. Apparently that doesn't work for Sam. Geez. Just...no wonder I fight with him so much, its the only way to get through to this bastard!
"Something wrong?"
Yes. Youre a fucking moron, that's what's...
No. I'm not going to ruin this over a song. I'm not. And maybe its different, because its Air Supply, but ( ... )
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Carly, God damn it, don't make me do it. I'm thisclose to breaking out something worse. If you don't just crack already I'm going to--
Okay, nice kiss. Sam likes this kiss. A lot. Very nice. Girlfriend in lap with this kind of kiss and even though she turned the song off, it's still very nice...
Wait. Whoa. Hang on. I'm trying to do something here. I'm trying to get her out of the damned perfect girlfriend thing. I need to focus. Snap out of it Howell, you can do this.
You can enjoy the kissing and the tongues and still do this. You really can.
I reached over, not breaking the kiss with Carly, and clicked again to turn the song back on. "I like this song." I kissed her again, and smiled.
Yeah, it's really getting to be hell not laughing. She's going to kill me after all this is done, but in a lot of ways, it's doing her a favor.
So it's alright. Plus I'll make sure to have fun with it while it lasts.
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"I like this song."He's fucking kidding me, right? Sam couldn't possibly--I mean, I know he likes the song and all, but not when we're...I just...just...has he completely and totally lost it? Did I bring back the wrong version of Sam or something ( ... )
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What Car, is that a problem? Come on now. You can say it. Go for it. Yell at me. Break. I know you, I know you want to.
"I'll just...I'll be in the living room. Studying.""Okay." I let her go, and smirked and shook my head once she was out of sight. Okay, fine. We just need to go a bit longer. And then after this, I'll find something else. I'm not giving up ( ... )
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That is it. That is fucking it. Something needs to be done, right now, before he has to haul me out of here in a straightjacket, because at this point,with all the shit he's been pulling, I'm going to need one of those. And soon.
I just can't get over how I brought my boyfriend back from the past, and he decided to repay me by becoming such an ass. He's taking advantage of everything. It needs to be stopped.
I walked over to the closet, pulled out one of my battle axes, and started for the bedroom, fully prepared to take out the computer.
And then I stopped.
"But I'm never gonna make it without you, do you really want to see me crawl... And I'm never gonna make it like you do... Making love out of nothing at all..."He's ( ... )
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... She's still being nice. Why the hell is she still being nice? Damn it, this isn't fair. All this work, and she hasn't gotten it yet.
"You're going to love this."
"I am?" What is she doing now? What she downlo... Is that what I think it is?!
"She's hotter than the guys in Air Supply, and I really like how she gives the song a country edge. You should listen to it with me. Its beautiful. This is really the only version I've heard of it that I love."
She's figured it out, hasn't she. That has to freakin' be it. And even if it isn't? I can't tolerate Carrie God damn Underwood, under any circumstances. I can't even begin to just... Damn it. And she knows that.
Which means, she's figured it out. At least it took me a shorter amount of time to damn well get that than it took her to figure out what I was trying to do ( ... )
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No, enough would have been half of the original version. Or telling me the truth and talking things out like a rational person. This wasn't enough, it was too much. And Sam made it a hell of a lot worse by bringing Air Supply into this. I'm not so stupid that I wouldn't figure it out eventually, but he has a lot of nerve if he thinks I am.
"Obviously, you get it by now."
"Get what?"
He thinks I'm stupid, I might as well play it that way. I mean, wanting to keep from pushing him over the edge again was obviously extremely dumb of me, wasn't it? I should have known that he'd rather fight all the time than have a nice, peaceful relationship, because who wouldn't want yelling and overheated rooms when they could sex and cookies?
"Please tell me this means you're going to act like you again.""Like me ( ... )
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"Yeah, like you." Maybe she hasn't exactly gotten it after all. She got the idea of what I was doing, but the rest of it is just absolutely screwed. Freakin' fantastic.
Well, at least we got to this point before I had to do something more drastic than Air Supply. That would have most likely ended in bloodshed.
And just so it's clear... My blood. Not hers.
Hey! What the hell is the pillow over?!
"You're such an ass."
I caught it and still ended up getting smacked in the face somehow, and rolled my eyes at her. "Come on Carly. This isn't you. Just like the crap I've been pulling isn't me. You can't tell me you're happy with this whole quiet perfection crap."
I threw the pillow back at her, and waited for her to come at me again. "I don't want to fight all the time, but I don't want you acting like someone else in the process, alright?" I'm not going to tell her she was acting like my mother. That'll drive her straight over the freakin' edge.
Yeah, I do want to save myself. Just a little. Enough not to do that.
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"Air Supply is secretly you." I argued, catching the pillow so that I wouldn't get hit. I don't think what I was doing was so bad. It wasn't perfect, but it was different. And maybe it wasn't different in a way I was particularly happy with, but by acting that way, I didn't have to worry about Sam and I creating something we couldn't get out of.
Whether he'll admit it or not, that is how it happens. Neither of us start out wanting to fight with each other. I love Sam, I hate it when we don't get along. But then there's something to yell over, and it starts out with something small and just...it keeps getting bigger. Before we know it, we've taken the argument to a place so far away from the original problem, we can't get back to it.
And then he leaves. Or I lock myself in the bedroom. And then we're both mad over something that could have been a lot smaller if we had just stoppedI ( ... )
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"The fights were the problem."
The last thing I'd like Sam to believe is that I'm not happy with him, or that I wasn't before. Overall, I thought we were okay. I didn't realize how carried away I got in our arguments until he was dead, but death aside...I don't know. I think we'd be better if we didn't push so much. Mostly, I think Sam would be better if I didn't push so much. So I thought I'd give it a try.
"Look, we're going to fight. If there's never a fight in a relationship, someone's cheating on the other person. Or, y'know, one of them is fighting to be insanely not themselves so nothing gets screwed up."Okay, maybe he's right about the second one. But the first one would never happen--unless Sam was the one doing the cheating. I'm worried about us, but that doesn't mean I'd ever look elsewhere. Although occassionally when I'm out with Alex or Arianna, I'll point out a good looking guy, or harmlessly flirt, thats not the same thing as what Sam is talking about here. ( ... )
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"Lay."
I think after all the time I spent picking up after Sam and doing everything he wanted-whether he wanted me to or not- he can let me give a few orders now. Not too many or I'll complain about him being too perfect, but a few. And I think he's going to like where I'm going with this anyway ( ... )
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