So, tomorrow marks the one year anniversary of me taking the helm as maintainer here in _survivors_ :) Wow has the time flown by... it's been a great year
( Read more... )
- Do you have specific anniversaries to your abuse or other traumatic experiences?
April 8 was the first time I was forced into having sex. We were dating for less than a month, and I remember he was really angry about something that happened between him and his friends. I went over to his house to cheer him up (he was already drunk by the time I got there), and he asked me to go with him to the park. I knew I shouldn't have gone, but I did anyway because I didn't know how to refuse without pissing him off. We went in his truck, parked, and he basically assumed that sex was going to happen. When I said no, he would stop for a few minutes and then try again.
There was also an incident that happened at a friend's house. My male friend just came out to being homosexual. We had gone swimming earlier that day, and he came into the room while I was changing from my bathing suit into my street clothes. I refuse to wear bathing suits now.
- If so, have the feelings lowered in intensity as the years have passed, or have they stayed at the same intensity?
Yeah. I still hate warm weather, but the connotations they had for me have started to ease up. I haven't had an anniversary for April 8 yet.
- Also, if so, how do you cope with the intense feelings that come up on that day?
I tell myself that my friend was an idiot and was just trying to prove something to himself. Though I'm not sure what.
- What good things in your life could you celebrate the anniversary of? Things could be - celebrating the day you graduated from school, or got a car, or even joined livejournal :)
I don't know. I suppose the anniversary of the day my boyfriend and I started dating - March 31.
Bonus: - Are there things besides the date that mark your anniversaries? i.e. do the memories come up when you see snow or holiday decorations, or summer weather, etc.
I don't like walking around outside when its dark out. I also haven't gone swimming (or worn a bathing suit) since the other incident.
The first anniversary can be pretty tough, and I'm glad that you've been developing your coping skills as much as you have - it gives you a good chance of being a bit less overwhelmed.
It's good that some of the triggers about those events have lessened in intensity a bit - that makes it a little less overwhelming to try to process the emotions those events bring up inside you.
April 8 was the first time I was forced into having sex. We were dating for less than a month, and I remember he was really angry about something that happened between him and his friends. I went over to his house to cheer him up (he was already drunk by the time I got there), and he asked me to go with him to the park. I knew I shouldn't have gone, but I did anyway because I didn't know how to refuse without pissing him off. We went in his truck, parked, and he basically assumed that sex was going to happen. When I said no, he would stop for a few minutes and then try again.
There was also an incident that happened at a friend's house. My male friend just came out to being homosexual. We had gone swimming earlier that day, and he came into the room while I was changing from my bathing suit into my street clothes. I refuse to wear bathing suits now.
- If so, have the feelings lowered in intensity as the years have passed, or have they stayed at the same intensity?
Yeah. I still hate warm weather, but the connotations they had for me have started to ease up. I haven't had an anniversary for April 8 yet.
- Also, if so, how do you cope with the intense feelings that come up on that day?
I tell myself that my friend was an idiot and was just trying to prove something to himself. Though I'm not sure what.
- What good things in your life could you celebrate the anniversary of? Things could be - celebrating the day you graduated from school, or got a car, or even joined livejournal :)
I don't know. I suppose the anniversary of the day my boyfriend and I started dating - March 31.
Bonus:
- Are there things besides the date that mark your anniversaries? i.e. do the memories come up when you see snow or holiday decorations, or summer weather, etc.
I don't like walking around outside when its dark out. I also haven't gone swimming (or worn a bathing suit) since the other incident.
Reply
It's good that some of the triggers about those events have lessened in intensity a bit - that makes it a little less overwhelming to try to process the emotions those events bring up inside you.
Reply
Leave a comment