Thought stirring question of the week: Support by proxy
Most survivors need a lot of extra support. Between our flashbacks, invasive thoughts, and all the struggles we go through, we often need a lot of support and extra love to help us get through. Many of us also struggle with getting the support we need. Often, our supporters fall victim to the daily grind of life and work and schedules, or our supporters need a short break to regain their energy to be able to keep supporting us.
For many survivors, this can be really tough - needing support, but not always being able to get it. So this week we're going to talk about a coping technique for both survivors and supporters called "proxy". The basic theory behind proxy support is this: A thing is chosen to be a stand-in for a particular person's support. Most commonly this takes the form of a stuffed animal, a favorite t-shirt, a blanket, maybe even a mix CD of songs - something that you can wear or listen to to remind you that specific person *wants* to be there for you all the time, even if they can't be there because of schedules or because they need a night off.
Proxies can be a big help to make us feel loved and supported, even when our supporters aren't around. It can be as easy as picking up a blanket to know someone's thinking about you or sending you extra hugs - and it's a great way for supporters who aren't sure how to help to be able to offer support.
So this week's questions are:
- Have you ever tried a support proxy before? What have they been?
- If not, how could you add support proxies into your current set of coping skills?
Bonus question:
What type of proxy (clothing, blanket, movie, etc.) do you think would work best for you?
For many survivors, this can be really tough - needing support, but not always being able to get it. So this week we're going to talk about a coping technique for both survivors and supporters called "proxy". The basic theory behind proxy support is this: A thing is chosen to be a stand-in for a particular person's support. Most commonly this takes the form of a stuffed animal, a favorite t-shirt, a blanket, maybe even a mix CD of songs - something that you can wear or listen to to remind you that specific person *wants* to be there for you all the time, even if they can't be there because of schedules or because they need a night off.
Proxies can be a big help to make us feel loved and supported, even when our supporters aren't around. It can be as easy as picking up a blanket to know someone's thinking about you or sending you extra hugs - and it's a great way for supporters who aren't sure how to help to be able to offer support.
So this week's questions are:
- Have you ever tried a support proxy before? What have they been?
- If not, how could you add support proxies into your current set of coping skills?
Bonus question:
What type of proxy (clothing, blanket, movie, etc.) do you think would work best for you?