i get bored,
my horoscope told me i was going to take a risk that would benefit me today. said that whatever chance ive been feeling like taking, to just take. itll come out just fine in the end. so i guess im facing the day blind today, becos life is really all about taking chances and risking everything for, well... everything. lets see how my night ends up.
plans already failed this morning.. that was spectacular - not that i was quite up for it after last night anyway. but just the same. i honest to god hate when people say theyll do something, then bail the total last second. and it always happens.. so i give. whatever... too bad people cant see that theyre the ones who push everything good away for no apparent reason. good luck with that kiddo - seriously.
terribly terribly drunk last night. keith left around 2:30 and when i went to go lay down i most deffinately started to hallucinate. sickening night, i swear. my stomache was trying to leap out of my mouth, and everytime i tried to swallow my guts felt like they were ready to go elsewhere. haha. then i closed my eyes, and my bed felt like a waterbed, so i felt like i was swimming. then my thoughts all turned into these millions of stupid black buttons. it was hard to breathe, and i was very very cold. but my blankets felt so far out of reach from the inside of my mind.. even though they were wrapped around me and i just felt like i couldve died right then and there. but then my thoughts got so loud i couldnt even hear myself breathe anymore. i could everyones voice i know screaming in my head. i felt like i was a mind-reader who couldnt control it and i was in a massive crowd... and ontop of that i got this stupid ringing in my ears that quite frankly sounded like angry ocean waves crashing inside me... and of course, i felt it. again... i was terribly terrinly wasted last night. but alas, no hangover and this is all.
farewell. <3
plans already failed this morning.. that was spectacular - not that i was quite up for it after last night anyway. but just the same. i honest to god hate when people say theyll do something, then bail the total last second. and it always happens.. so i give. whatever... too bad people cant see that theyre the ones who push everything good away for no apparent reason. good luck with that kiddo - seriously.
terribly terribly drunk last night. keith left around 2:30 and when i went to go lay down i most deffinately started to hallucinate. sickening night, i swear. my stomache was trying to leap out of my mouth, and everytime i tried to swallow my guts felt like they were ready to go elsewhere. haha. then i closed my eyes, and my bed felt like a waterbed, so i felt like i was swimming. then my thoughts all turned into these millions of stupid black buttons. it was hard to breathe, and i was very very cold. but my blankets felt so far out of reach from the inside of my mind.. even though they were wrapped around me and i just felt like i couldve died right then and there. but then my thoughts got so loud i couldnt even hear myself breathe anymore. i could everyones voice i know screaming in my head. i felt like i was a mind-reader who couldnt control it and i was in a massive crowd... and ontop of that i got this stupid ringing in my ears that quite frankly sounded like angry ocean waves crashing inside me... and of course, i felt it. again... i was terribly terrinly wasted last night. but alas, no hangover and this is all.
farewell. <3