(no subject)

[_retina_]

I cannot believe your gone.
I took you away.
I finally pushed far enough.
I really hope your happy.
I never realized until now why you left completely.
I hope one day you will forgive me for being so weak.
So disgusting.
I loved you.
I hope you meet a girl with everything. Everything I was but BETTER.
I hope you already have.
You deserve it.

I know now that we both put each other through hell.
But I know....how wrong I was.
I can't believe I forgot.
And now I can't.

I hope one day...you can forgive me.
I just want that.
I guess you'll never look at me fondly...
I wish I could of given myself at least that.
So one day you won't feel ashamed for loving me at one time.

Justin..I really can't believe we're gone. Dead.
I can't believe it.
I feel like I've been away for so long.
I can't believe I haven't realized.
Maybe it's because I've been away from you.
It's been almost a year.

I'd do anything for us to talk again.
I'd get money together, fly all the way up there, just to talk to you.
To tell you how horribly sorry I am.
I need this.
I don't even know if you hurt because of me.
And this is why your not calling...
But I'd rather try....

I just cannot believe we're gone.
I don't remember what it was like.
But it doesn't matter.
I just keep wondering what we were.
It just seems like all we did was hurt one another, when we needed the other the most.
I wish......
it just ended differently.

I love you Justin.
I always will.
I'm so sorry.
I hope one day you will know that.
And accept it.

God...I can't believe what I've done. I was so stupid.