(no subject)

[_onetrackmind]

Two days ago, or sometime to that extent, I was told that I keep everything inside. And that I shouldn't. But you know what? I do it for a reason. Because if I open my big fat mouth, if I tell anyone anything, it will come back and bite me in the ass.

I should never say anything.
I am meant to be seen and not heard.
I am background noise.

My dad called earlier and I told him that I heard mom was mad at him the other day, for playing golf or something. And I told him that she thinks he's there mostly for social pleasure, rather than business. And not to tell her that.

So just now I go say hello to my mom. To keep up the facade that I'm a happy-go-fucking-lucky little girl. Who asks me what I said to my dad.

A: My mom is mad at me.
B: My mom is mad at me for talking to my dad.
C: My dad thinks that I am completely fine with him being away.
D: My dad thinks that I am completely fine with him being away because I give off the impression that I am completely fine with him being away.

Conclusion 1: I am a pushover (old news).
Conclusion 2: I will always revert to this state of emoness, and must therefore stop apologizing for it.
Conclusion 3: My life has been a soap opera. Minus the killing and stuff.

Bye.