Oct 09, 2003 15:39
I got a ride home with my brother and kelsey today. hanu's such a freak. and I hate how kelsey knows him way better than I do. she's super sweet and everything but sometimes I almost feel.. jealous of her. I mean, I barely even know my own brother anymore, it seems. I never see him. sigh.
grr I keep smoking soo much. and then I come home, I pass out at around 5 or 6 and wake up the next morning with none of my homework done and it's just stupid. I don't like weed, being stoned isn't even that great and it's stupid. but I keep doing it. ugh. *rolls eyes*
josh says he could get LSD but he won't do it for me. because he thinks I "can't handle it" and grr it was pissing me off because he was so serious about it, he was like "NO. no fucking way. I know people that have FREAKED OUT on that shit." and I'm like trying to explain to him that it's different, the way I'd use it, I wouldn't be doing it all stupid and watching the wall jump out at me or some shit. I tried explaining that it's a spiritual thing, but of course he couldn't understand what I was talking about, I couldn't even explain it anyway. but yeah. grr. I want some.
umm... I just found out about lars, he has some disease... eek. :( poor lars. fuck that is sad. I hope he's okay.
I HATE SCHOOL WITH A PASSION. no, serious, I'm going insane. ugh.
I feel like my life is this huge wheel. that keeps GOING and GOING and GOING but it's not even going anywhere at all. one of those exercise bikes.