(no subject)
i hope by accident that you somehow come to read this.
it wouldn;t matter;; it wouldn;t make a difference.
i;; for all intents and purposes;;
am absolutely crazy about you.
people are always telling me to look at the bigger picture.
to look at all the bullshit that happened;;
that bullshit that came out of left field;;
but really didn;t.
i wish i would have seen the signs.
more than anything;;
curiousity plauges me.
was everything that happened meaningless.?
did you always just go through the motions of making me think i had worth just because you;; yourself didn;t want to feel empty anymore.?
when it comes down to it;; it;s all about me.
no matter the frantic pleas i made where you said that i deserved so much more;; that i was a better person;;
were those things that you actually believed.?
sometimes i have a hard time believing that this is the case.
what then;; was it.
if i was sufficient than this wouldn;t have happened.
so any way you look at it;; i wasn;t enough.
i loved everything about you.
i loved the things that no one else saw.
i loved the car game&&the movies&&the nerd shit;; all of it.
i loved the way that you touched me;;
the inspiration that you gave me.
i hope desperately that you know this.
i don;t hate her;;
i wouldn;t even go as far to say i was jealous;;
i;m my own person with my own admeriable.. whatever...
i just don;t know why some people continue to do something that absolutely has no point&&no merit.
i wish i would have gone on that fucking trip.
it wouldn;t matter;; it wouldn;t make a difference.
i;; for all intents and purposes;;
am absolutely crazy about you.
people are always telling me to look at the bigger picture.
to look at all the bullshit that happened;;
that bullshit that came out of left field;;
but really didn;t.
i wish i would have seen the signs.
more than anything;;
curiousity plauges me.
was everything that happened meaningless.?
did you always just go through the motions of making me think i had worth just because you;; yourself didn;t want to feel empty anymore.?
when it comes down to it;; it;s all about me.
no matter the frantic pleas i made where you said that i deserved so much more;; that i was a better person;;
were those things that you actually believed.?
sometimes i have a hard time believing that this is the case.
what then;; was it.
if i was sufficient than this wouldn;t have happened.
so any way you look at it;; i wasn;t enough.
i loved everything about you.
i loved the things that no one else saw.
i loved the car game&&the movies&&the nerd shit;; all of it.
i loved the way that you touched me;;
the inspiration that you gave me.
i hope desperately that you know this.
i don;t hate her;;
i wouldn;t even go as far to say i was jealous;;
i;m my own person with my own admeriable.. whatever...
i just don;t know why some people continue to do something that absolutely has no point&&no merit.
i wish i would have gone on that fucking trip.