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[_wes_pryce_]

“Hey Wesley, wait. Mind if I join you?”I looked up startled at those words and blinked at Doyle as the door felt shut behind him. I had not anticipated anyone joining me while I walked outside. In fact, I had anticipated that he and Cordelia would get into one of their usual fights again. I really which they would just kiss and make up so that the

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[__doyle]

I knew it, at first Wesley was gong to try and get me to go back there or to talk to her but nope I wasn’t going to. I wasn’t going to cave in, besides I already knew she didn’t want me, she made that one clear alright. Now if only she could just flat out say it to me, but I guess the little princess couldn’t even do that. Real nice way to treat a man.

“No not in the mood to bicker at all.” I sighed as we headed out. “I know that’s where your going and right now doing research would be better then listening to her and realizing how much of a fool I was for even attempting anything with her.” I shook my head.

“ I really did put myself in a trap didn’t I?” I said glancing over at him.

Then he mentioned those magic words, the pub. That was all I needed to get myself level headed again, well more or less so to speak. A few good drinks and I would be good, it was my way of dealing with my problems. Sure I would the whole you can’t just run away but that was all I knew how to do. Angel did help me over come that a bit but look at him, he does the same thing. Great example there don’t you think.

He offered to go to our usual place, not that we went there that often but a few times we did. It was mainly times I needed to get away from her and just let lose. For some reason I liked talking to Wesley, I felt like he actually listened and could understand to an extent. Angel was too much with the brooding and vampire stuff and Cordy well, most of the talking was about there. So there was Wesley one day and I thought why not give the guy a chance. I often got worried that he may just think I was using him as an escape goat but I wasn’t, well not really.

[_wes_pryce_]

My mouth quirked a little when he said he'd walked right into that trap. Because yes, he had. But I wasn't about to voice that. This wasn't really about my opinion. If it were, I'd lock them both up in a the basement and leave them there for as long as it takes to get their heads out of their arses. Was I the only one who saw what was going on here? Then again, Angel being the only other one, I guess so. He wouldn't even noticed it if the hotel were on fire these days, so to speak.

"I would hardly call going out once, 'attempting anything with her' Doyle." Pushing up my glasses, I turned and started toward the pub. "Just because it didn't work out that one time, doesn't mean that you can't try again. Cordelia can be a little difficult at times." Then again, what would I know. She practically flung herself at me in Sunnydale. "But that's none of my business of course."

And I should stop talking. The point if for me to listen, not blather on about nothing. We walked down the street, the pub wasn't all that far. We were quite fortunate to find a place so close by where they served real beer. And not that dreck they had the nerve to refer to as beer in this sodding country. Opening the door, I held it open for Doyle as we stepped into the pub.

"What can I get you? The usual?"

[__doyle]

Great he was going on telling me how I didn’t really attempt anything with her because I just went out with her once, what did he know about the manner. I doubt the guy had ever been on a date of his own. “Hey what do you know about it?” I said in a bit of a harsh tone. I sighed and glanced down “Look I didn’t mean to come off that harsh its just, well you see the way that she is. Look at her, all dolled up and high class. She doesn’t deserve to be with someone like me. What could I even offer her? Nothing, but someone with class and money could offer her the world, the type of world someone like her needed.”

But stepped into the pub and ordered our usual.

“It was a mistake even asking her out on that date. I should’ve just left things the way they were before”

Our drinks finally came and I took a long drink of it. It hit the spot, now just order me a few more of these and I would be good to go. But I suppose now was not the right time to be getting drunk.

[_wes_pryce_]

"I did date her at one point as well," I said softly. Even if it was only to the prom, we were working our way up to something else. But neither of us had been really ready back then. And now I'm think she only went after me because I looked as though I was rich in my Council issued suits. No more of those, I can't afford them. But I'd like to think Cordelia has changed since then.

Sighing, I shook my head at him and nodded at the bartender when he brought over our drinks. Taking a long drink from it, I put the glass down at then looked over at Doyle again. "Do you think Cordelia is..." I frowned and looked for a word that would fit best. "...shallow?" And that answer should be no, by the way.

Once up on a time she may have been. But since she's come to Los Angeles, she's grown up a lot. Sure, she still might faint if there's a shoe sale at neimans or whatever. But I'd like to think she's better then that now. So why wouldn't she give a fellow such a Doyle a chance? He never seems to think much of himself either I've noticed though.

[__doyle]

“What?” I raised a brow as I looked at him. Did he just say that he dated Cordy once. “Well now, that is a bit of information that I was never informed on.” I didn’t really picture him being the type that Cordy would go after. “How and when did this happen?” I was now interested in this, maybe that was the reason why they always made comments back and forth at each other. Then again she was like that with just about anyone. Truthfully I now felt a bit strange thinking about being around the two of them, what if they still had something for each other and would, well I better not think about it.

Then he asked if I though Cordy was shallow. “No” I sighed “It’s not that, sure at times she may act a bit shallow but its all an act she has going on. I have seen the true side of her at times. Its just that, well its like beauty and the beast sort of thing. She’s the beauty and I’m the beast. I know I could never give her the type of life she wants. Come on who would want to date some demon.”

I glanced down at the table before taking another sip of my drink.

[_wes_pryce_]

"Yes," I nodded. "In Sunnydale. We were both very different back then. I'm sorry, I thought you knew." Not that either of us really followed up on that. Not after that disastrous kiss. Even though I'd wanted to, I was to embarrassed and ashamed of who I was then. Even not I still am. I mean, who am I really? I'm just the book guy of the agency, who can barely make ends meet. And besides, by now I saw her more a a sister then anything else.

At least Doyle and Angel really contribute to the fight. Doyle with his visions and the fact that he knows how to fight. And Angel by...well, by being Angel. Me? I just sit around my books, figure out this weeks demon and tell the others how kill it. And sometimes they're nice enough to bring me along. And get in the way.

Sipping my drink, I frowned at his words. Why was he thinking so little of himself? That really annoyed me. He was more then that. And I knew Cordelia thought so as well, even if she didn't act that way sometimes. And it was what she was sometimes pulling off. An act.

"I can think of several people who'd date a demon," I said, taking another sip from my drink. Lord, this is the good stuff. "A lot of people might not. But they wouldn't date the fellow with the wrong car either. It's not the looks for most people, it's what's inside. And you? Allen Francis Doyle, there's nothing wrong with your inside. And Cordelia knows that. I'd say if you really want it to work, just give it time. I think you two have a chance."

I swear, I feel like a cassette recorder sometimes. Maybe I really should lock them both up in some basement and play the tape. Maybe then they'll both get it. Doubtful, but I'll keep trying. Can't actually count on Angel to do so. He hardly notices their little Cordelia an Doyle dance.

[__doyle]

I suppose the two of them were different back then. From what I knew of Cordelia she used to be some high class cheerleader. Something about her having all this money before and then losing it all, I believe it had something to do with her father.

“Yea several people who would date a demon but Cordy not being one of them.” What was I saying, she did go on that date with me after she found out I was a demon. “Sure she went out on that date with me and all was peachy but that was it. And about what’s inside, what is inside of me?” I looked at him for a moment. “look at me Wesley, I’m a half demon who still haven’t come in terms of what I am. I’ve gotten closer to accepting it then before but there is still part of me that just wants to run away as fast as I can.”

I continued to look down for awhile. Why was I still like this, Angel had shown me the plus side of what I was, that now I could help people and I even did help out my own kind and finally showed who I truly was, but still I couldn’t fully grasp the idea of being a demon. You live your whole life believing your just some normal kid like anyone else and know that there are no such thing as monsters out there but then one day you find out that there are. How does anyone recover from something like that.

“It’s not that she doesn’t see who I really am, its that I will never be able to give her the life she truly deserves.”

[_wes_pryce_]

I listened to him rant on and my good mood plummeted down. I ordered us another drink, since that was so obviously needed. Why, I had no idea. But why was he thinking so little of himself? He's getting the visions, that means that the Powers that Be must've seen something special in him. And I know Cordelia does, if only she'd finally admit it and climb of that high horse of hers.

Sighing, I nodded my thanks at the bartender and took a large sip from my whiskey. This really has been quite a day. I still don't know why I was supposed to come along to this meeting. And then there was Angel's strange behavior. Cordy and Doyle's continuing little soap. Me being useless. It's been one of those days, yup.

"Doyle," I interrupted his rant. I gave him a stern look and took off my glasses. Tossing them on the bar I sighed again. "Don't make me hit you over the head. You know I'm not the violent type, but everytime you go down that road it gets a little harder to resist. Why? Why do you keep putting yourself down? You're no less then anyone else, you should stop seeing yourself that way. You're better then that." There. I said it, now I need a drink before he gets angry with me.

[__doyle]

I was a bit surprised with Wesley ordering another drink but it wasn’t like I could complain. At times like this I felt like I could drink the place dry, also whenever I had one of those damn visions. Just then Wesley interpreted all that I was saying and gave me this look, not what that I usually saw on him. I took a sip of the drink and looked at him. And then he went on. I almost laughed at first when he said the whole thing about hitting my over the head but I kept a serous look on my face. Wesley wasn’t joking around, which ok sure it wasn’t that hard to not take him serious, especially when he was saying something like this, but some of what he said made sense.

“So I really get that annoying to you, as to where you would want to hit me over the head.” Just saying that last part almost made me laugh again but once more I fought the urge.

“Why do I keep putting myself down. Why do you think Wesley?” It wasn’t like he didn’t already know, probably everyone knew by now. “Look at where my life has lead me. I worked so hard for so many years to get where I was and then just like that it was all taken away. The life I lived was false and meant nothing anymore, you even find out that your father wasn’t completely what he said he was.”

“You grew up living in this world, I on the other hand didn’t. And yes its one thing just being exposed to it, but its another to learn you are part of it yourself. And me being better then this.” I shook my head “Maybe if I didn’t have to run from the truth then I would be better then this but I’m not. How I was at first, I was a miss. I couldn’t face up to anything and I still can’t completely. Whenever something bad comes along I just run away, even this whole thing with Cordy” I stood up starting to get worked up “What am I doing? Once again running away.”

I don’t know if it was the alcohol or the fact that I was starting to realize stuff about myself that was getting me to act the way I was. Whichever it was it didn’t really matter to me. I glanced down at him before taking my seat again.

[_wes_pryce_]

I raised my eyebrow at his rant. Of course I'd know nothing about the life you had being ripped away. It's not as though I was trained to become the best watcher, in fact *was* a watcher. To both Slayers in fact. It wasn't as that was suddenly ripped away by say...oh...being fired. And it wasn't as though I had to completely redefine myself. Who I was, what I should do now. It wasn't as though I felt completely lost after all that. And it wasn't Angel and the powers that be that gave me my second chance. Like they did with Doyle.

Actually, it was. But that's not important right now. This isn't about me. And telling him all this, doesn't do Doyle a whole lot of good. He's once again convinced himself that he's not worthy. Of what? I'll never really know, but in this case it's Cordelia. Personally, I think it's Cordelia's 'hard to get' game she's playing, that gets in the way here. Which might make him feel less. When he isn't!

Maybe I should've hit him over the head.

"Perhaps, it's time you stopped running. There comes a time when you have no where to run to. And there's a time when running away may be the biggest mistake to make." Such as giving up on Cordelia before he even started. "If I were you. Which, of course I'm not. But if I were you, I'd stop running and give it a try. At least then you can look at yourself honestly and say you gave it as good as you got." Yes, because that's what you do, isn't it Pryce? Yup, no running away here. Which is why I live in a dingy little apartment and have no real friends. Just...good fellow workers.

[__doyle]

I listened to the little speech he gave me “You don’t even have to say it, one date you don’t consider giving it a fair shot.“ And then his little speech started to make some sense. That’s it I’ll just stop running. “And I did give it a chance before” I mumbled “You know what Wesley, your actually starting to make some sense here” I smiled before taking another drink. “That’s it, I march back over there and swipe the princess off her feet.”

I stood up and turned towards the door taking a few steps before I started to feel dizzy. And just then I crawled back into my shell of I’m not good enough and this will never work. I turned back around and headed towards my chair and sat back down. “On second thought, I won’t. Instead I’ll just order myself another drink”

Yep, that’s right I’ll just sit here and drink another drink and then maybe another. Maybe enough to were I pass out and Wesley has to drag me back home.

[_wes_pryce_]

Nodding encouragingly, I smiled at him and then sipped my drink. Finally, he was starting to see the light. At least someone listens to me once and a while. "That's right," I agreed. "Just go over there and use that Irish charm to swipe her off her feet." Irish charm? I glared at the whiskey, blaming it for letting an English man say such a thing as 'Irish Charm'. Good god, what's next? Celebrating Saint Patrick's day?

I was just about to order another drink when Doyle came back though. Frowning, I gave him a confused look and almost visibly saw him crawl back into that self doubt. Sighing, I slumped my shoulders and shook my head. Well, at least I'd tried. Maybe I should re-consider hitting him over the head.

"Dutch courage?" I asked, raising my eyebrow at him. "Doyle, my friend. Just...go over there and tell her how you feel. Then it's up to her how she'll react to that. But at least you can both stop that bloody dancing around each other." And stop driving me insane with it!