(no subject)

[_iforgiveyou]

so far this weekend has been boring.last night was jordan(my middle brother)'s family birthday party.my relatives were telling me how great utah's going to be..and how good it is for me..and how they wish they could go..and i wanted to slap them.and when i said but i dont get to see my friends..my grandma's like "well make new friends".excuse me but i dont want new friends.and yeah i'll make friends with the girls there..BUT THEY'LL ALL LIVE ALL OVER THE COUNTRY AND I CANT HANGOUT WITH THEM HERE IN OSWEGAY.maybe they'll understand my problems of everyone at school thinking im a stuckup bitch.considering they're all rich kids themselves(haha).yeah so tonight i was home alone for like six hours.and i know what you're all thinking.but get whatever you're thinking out of your head because i didnt do anything bad.i was just freaked out for half those six hours because i heard a gum snap noise and i was freaked out that someone was in my house but too afraid to investigate cuz i was in the kitchen.this house is too big to stay home alone in.and i wanted to turn on the pool room lights but i couldnt get them on because i dont know how to work them.i dont know how to work anything in this stupid house.all the light switches are so damn confusing..they're not normal light switches.you have to like rotate them or press them or do random things with them and it annoys the hell out of me.god..no one is going to come over and be like "omg..your lightswitches are so amazing".and i hate how like in the bedrooms theres a lightswitch that controls all the power in the room.my house is so ghetto.
alright.
scary thought.
i'm going to utah.for six months.
its definite
my parents paid some of the tuition?is that what you call it?
i'm so scared.i'm so angry.
and there's nothing i can do about it.
If I could wish one thing right now..it would be to change your mind
the shocked face is smiling.but my shocked feeling doesn't constitute smiling.