mathematical feats... great and small...
well then now where to begin.
i slept late this morning-- again...
woke up at 11...
i hate sleeping late now
i had a HUGE headache because of it...
so yeah i got up, ate my normal saturday morning bagel--- showered and then did my hair and got ready. ma and i went to andre's wedding to decorate. it was rather uncomfortable to be in the HEART of Jamaica all dressed up. don't get me wrong, the church was beauitful-- but it was strange to be the only white person.. i wasn't uncomfortable at all.. (not being sarcastic) and i rather liked it...
andre looked great... in his cream tuxedo-- he was extremely nervous too.. ahh man i lovvveee that guy-- the wedding was really pretty i really liked it...
the only thing though was that they didn't seem to be "into" it... like both of them looked like they just wanted to get it over with-- and maybe thats for reasons beyond me but i just couldn't understand why they weren't smiling and laughing and feeling like what they should feel-- the happiest moment of their lives... idk i guess i just picture my own wedding to be extremely different...
so i came home afterwards and sat down and whoop- taught myself how to use an abacus!! ahhh its so ridiculously interesting to use--- i'm gunna try and master it because it really is so much better than any other way--- lol.. what a DORKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKkkkk
then i ate chinese food and thenn errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr i worked? researched jonathan's second birthday gift? and thats it?
it seemed like i did a lot more..
oh well...
12 days til the cruise...
good stuff..
ummmm i think i'm BEGINNING to figure things out. idk as far as christian is, i have 2 days to get my head on straight of what i want to say to him and what i've got to say to him. but it's becoming a little clearer... each day i think of him more and more and the more and more i do the more and more i realized that i haven't been truely "happy" with anyone other than him... and i dont know, i want to go back. i mean i have to talk to him about it and see if he's ready to take on the obstacles already... but i think thats what i want... idk... i got some more time to think about it
as far as college. i know i have to go away. my mom mentioned-- and imade her stop--- the subject today because she talked to my cousin Katie that she was going to board at CW Post even tho she really didn't want to (she lives in Riverhead, too far to travel)... and i think she said it to make me feel bad that even Katie doesn't wanna go away from her family-- but the more i think about that (even tho i stop myself every time i do) i realize that i'll be happier if i go away. i love my friends here, my family here, yes... but if i dont go away i'm afraid i'm going to be the biggest hermit/loser EVER. i stay home just about every night of the week --- unless my mom has something to do-- nd then i go out. not only that, i really dont have friends that i feel i have a strong relationship with. other than maybe christian, lauren and nora-- (questionable on the last one)-- i feel like there is no other reason i should. i realy think being on my own will be an experience that i cannot pass up. i mean i'm not saying i made my decision-- i still have to get accepted to somewhere-- but i think i'm ready to take on the task of breaking the news to my parents... its going to be rough-- and i'm going to fully develop it before-- but as of right now, i feel like thats what i wanna do.
who knows, that COULD change.
well tomorrow i haveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee errr oh yes, Jordan's baptism. ahhhh i love my neice and can't wait to go see her.. i just wanna see her tho... the rest of this process-- i feel-- is going to be rather uncomfortable for me and the rest of my family who knows absolutely no one but my sister, my brother-in-law and the baby. plus, my dad's ex wife is going to be there and lets just say i wanna slit the woman's throat.. xD.... i'm soooo glad that my brother is going because i'll at least have someone to sit and talk with... i've been wanting to talk to him about Christian/ the college situation that i have been struggling about--- maybe i'll get a good moment to do that..
you never know...
ahh yeah i gotta get up early tomorrow...
BUT, here's the song of tonight... hoobastank tonight
"Another day goes without any change
The feeling we live with still remains
We're stuck in a hole and we're searching for anythign to hold onto
There has to be somewhere that we can be safe from the lives we live each day
There has to be somewhere that we can be far away...
We have to escape and I will go anywhere if you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together, together everyday
We have to escape...
We could be living how we wanted to
Instead of doing things we're forced to do
With no one to tell us that we should be going through what they went through
There has to be someplace that nobody knows, somewhere we can only go
There has to be someplace that we can be all alone...
We have to escape and I will go anywhere if you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together, together everyday (x2)
Oooooo... together everyday
oh yeaaaah...
We have to escape
We have to escape
We have to escape and I will go anywhere if you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together, together everyday (x2)
We have to escape...
"
-Hoobastank
time for the sleepy-sleeps
goodnight jake-a-snake.... i mean---
goodnight never never land.
i slept late this morning-- again...
woke up at 11...
i hate sleeping late now
i had a HUGE headache because of it...
so yeah i got up, ate my normal saturday morning bagel--- showered and then did my hair and got ready. ma and i went to andre's wedding to decorate. it was rather uncomfortable to be in the HEART of Jamaica all dressed up. don't get me wrong, the church was beauitful-- but it was strange to be the only white person.. i wasn't uncomfortable at all.. (not being sarcastic) and i rather liked it...
andre looked great... in his cream tuxedo-- he was extremely nervous too.. ahh man i lovvveee that guy-- the wedding was really pretty i really liked it...
the only thing though was that they didn't seem to be "into" it... like both of them looked like they just wanted to get it over with-- and maybe thats for reasons beyond me but i just couldn't understand why they weren't smiling and laughing and feeling like what they should feel-- the happiest moment of their lives... idk i guess i just picture my own wedding to be extremely different...
so i came home afterwards and sat down and whoop- taught myself how to use an abacus!! ahhh its so ridiculously interesting to use--- i'm gunna try and master it because it really is so much better than any other way--- lol.. what a DORKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKkkkk
then i ate chinese food and thenn errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr i worked? researched jonathan's second birthday gift? and thats it?
it seemed like i did a lot more..
oh well...
12 days til the cruise...
good stuff..
ummmm i think i'm BEGINNING to figure things out. idk as far as christian is, i have 2 days to get my head on straight of what i want to say to him and what i've got to say to him. but it's becoming a little clearer... each day i think of him more and more and the more and more i do the more and more i realized that i haven't been truely "happy" with anyone other than him... and i dont know, i want to go back. i mean i have to talk to him about it and see if he's ready to take on the obstacles already... but i think thats what i want... idk... i got some more time to think about it
as far as college. i know i have to go away. my mom mentioned-- and imade her stop--- the subject today because she talked to my cousin Katie that she was going to board at CW Post even tho she really didn't want to (she lives in Riverhead, too far to travel)... and i think she said it to make me feel bad that even Katie doesn't wanna go away from her family-- but the more i think about that (even tho i stop myself every time i do) i realize that i'll be happier if i go away. i love my friends here, my family here, yes... but if i dont go away i'm afraid i'm going to be the biggest hermit/loser EVER. i stay home just about every night of the week --- unless my mom has something to do-- nd then i go out. not only that, i really dont have friends that i feel i have a strong relationship with. other than maybe christian, lauren and nora-- (questionable on the last one)-- i feel like there is no other reason i should. i realy think being on my own will be an experience that i cannot pass up. i mean i'm not saying i made my decision-- i still have to get accepted to somewhere-- but i think i'm ready to take on the task of breaking the news to my parents... its going to be rough-- and i'm going to fully develop it before-- but as of right now, i feel like thats what i wanna do.
who knows, that COULD change.
well tomorrow i haveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee errr oh yes, Jordan's baptism. ahhhh i love my neice and can't wait to go see her.. i just wanna see her tho... the rest of this process-- i feel-- is going to be rather uncomfortable for me and the rest of my family who knows absolutely no one but my sister, my brother-in-law and the baby. plus, my dad's ex wife is going to be there and lets just say i wanna slit the woman's throat.. xD.... i'm soooo glad that my brother is going because i'll at least have someone to sit and talk with... i've been wanting to talk to him about Christian/ the college situation that i have been struggling about--- maybe i'll get a good moment to do that..
you never know...
ahh yeah i gotta get up early tomorrow...
BUT, here's the song of tonight... hoobastank tonight
"Another day goes without any change
The feeling we live with still remains
We're stuck in a hole and we're searching for anythign to hold onto
There has to be somewhere that we can be safe from the lives we live each day
There has to be somewhere that we can be far away...
We have to escape and I will go anywhere if you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together, together everyday
We have to escape...
We could be living how we wanted to
Instead of doing things we're forced to do
With no one to tell us that we should be going through what they went through
There has to be someplace that nobody knows, somewhere we can only go
There has to be someplace that we can be all alone...
We have to escape and I will go anywhere if you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together, together everyday (x2)
Oooooo... together everyday
oh yeaaaah...
We have to escape
We have to escape
We have to escape and I will go anywhere if you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together, together everyday (x2)
We have to escape...
"
-Hoobastank
time for the sleepy-sleeps
goodnight jake-a-snake.... i mean---
goodnight never never land.