Happily Ever After: Dirty Sexy Money
Title: Happily Ever After
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Characters: Karen, Nick/Karen
Word Count: 1410
Disclaimer: Everything belongs to ABC. I’m just playing during the winter hiatus
Spoilers: up to 1x10, just to be safe
Summary: The first time Karen gets married, she is 21.
Author’s Note: Karen’s first marriage is inspired by the song Smoke Baby by Hawksley Workman. Her second husband is based loosely on Tony Romo because I think it’s hilarious he’s been linked to all these blonde stars in the media recently. I tried to keep the timeline and her marriages as close to canon as possible, using some of the nuggets of info we know but there are a lot of gaps and holes. Karen sort of fascinates me, especially in the way that she’s hopelessly in love with Nick and had him at one point - and yet, what happened? Here’s just a small part of one possible explanation. Hope you enjoy.
Looking back, looking back at me. I'm not how I used to be. Take me back, take me back into history. Diamond ring, tie me down, just like it used to be. Marry me? Marry me? Forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, ever - happily ever after. - Marry Me, No Doubt
The first time Karen gets married, she is 21. She’s known Scott for four months, three of which they spend engaged, and the ring feels all wrong on her finger.
Her father protests she’s too young, her mother simply asks if this is what she truly wants. They have a huge fight in Tripp’s study about it but Karen wins because, no matter what, she’s her Daddy’s little girl and Tish never had much of a backbone anyway. (It probably helps that Karen knows about Dutch, she’s the only one, and Tish says some hurtful things but Karen manages to silence her with a threat in her eyes.)
When her parents meet Scott’s parents, different people doesn’t even come close to explaining it. But Scott Senior and Tripp bond over a bottle of tequila and Tripp’s drunk when he walks her down the aisle. Karen doesn’t mind, thanks to her own alcohol and drug infused haze, and she doesn’t end up remembering much of the ceremony anyway.
Karen thinks she’s madly in love but later, Karen will realize that she was in love with the idea of Scott: his rocker lifestyle, his lower class British accent, and, most importantly, his glaringly obvious differences from Nick. Scott’s the drummer in a band that sounds a little like the Rolling Stones and parties just as hard. Nothing like idyllic and principled Nick.
Karen turns into the sort of person who lies around in dressing rooms, surrounded by alcohol bottles and lines of cocaine. Who stands outside the back of concert venues in her bra and panties, blowing cigarette smoke out in disaffected puffs. She and Scott have huge screaming matches and marathon make-up sex and when she looks at herself in the mirror, she thinks she wears too much eyeliner and she’s too thin. Karen blacks out regularly, doesn’t remember days on end, and hates herself every minute of it.
After a few months, Karen decides that she’s over this type of life. She leaves the tour and gets a divorce from Scott
She is still 21.
--
Karen’s 23 when she meets James McLaughlin at a club in Vegas on New Year’s Eve. She’s done with the drugs, having done enough during her brief marriage with Scott to last a lifetime, but she’s not done with alcohol and they get drunk enough to have sex in the bathroom at midnight. He’s the quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys, the star of the league, and Karen can’t help but feel proud that of all the girls at the club that night, he picked her. She goes to his playoff game a few weeks later and she couldn’t care less about football but she does likes the stir the magazines make over her appearance in a McLaughlin jersey.
She keeps going to Cowboys games and they keep winning, eventually becoming Super Bowl champs. When James kisses Karen after hoisting his MVP award, the picture makes the front page of the New York Post.
James meets Nick, just once. She’s with James at some huge art show in New York because James likes to pretend he’s cultural, so his fans think he’s more than football and a pretty face. Karen hasn’t seen Nick in a while, not since he and his dad had a big falling out, and when she spies him across the room, she freezes for a moment and feels her stomach bottom out. She pulls herself together enough to meet Nick’s intelligent wife, Lisa, who is an art collector for some gallery and Karen’s completely thrown by Lisa’s baby bump and how happy Nick looks.
That night, James proposes and Karen accepts, telling herself that James makes her just as happy as Nick did. The ring is expensive, bought with Gatorade endorsement money, and Karen finds herself wishing for the tiny diamond that was all Nick could afford.
She catches James with some blond starlet a year or two later. She throws the oversized ring at him and storms out of their apartment. As she boards a plane to go back to New York, something like relief settles inside of her.
She is 25.
--
Karen becomes the face of the Darling Family Foundation and, with the help of the Darling family accountant, invests most of her inheritance by the time she is 26. She’s on a better path now, she knows, and even if she made mistakes in getting married twice already, she can at least pride herself on still being friendly with her exes. She runs into Scott sometimes at parties (he’s got a Grammy under his belt and two stints in rehab, neither of which helped) and James occasionally makes appearances at fundraisers the Darlings host. It’s at one of the fundraisers that she meets Sebastian Fleet through a mutual friend.
He’s enthralls her immediately. Sebastian’s smarter than anyone she’s ever dated, even Nick, and he’s incredibly cultured (in the real way, not in the way James pretended to be). But she’s also the same old Karen and his body is really the crucial selling point. They’re dating seriously within a few weeks. Karen decides to disclose her full dating past, including Nick’s proposal, because she’s mature now but it turns out that talking about Nick’s proposal opens up old wounds and, according to Sebastian, drives a wedge between them. Of course, it doesn’t help that as an anthropologist, Sebastian’s gone a lot. Karen guesses that when he’s home, there’s some tension. She normally ignores it and coaxes him into bed. It’s much easier for everyone.
Sebastian knows that Karen doesn’t realize she’s simply trying to fill the void Nick left in her. The difference is, he can and after two years of pretty amicable marriage, they divorce on great terms.
She is 28.
--
Karen stays single for a good three years before she gets engaged to Freddy. He’s another athlete but she tells herself it’s a different kind of athlete, golf isn’t really a sport, and Freddy agrees to leave the PGA Tour for her. (She tolerated football, there’s no way she likes Freddy enough to tolerate golf.) He’s funny and cute and pretty good in bed - although, not as good as his caddy was that one time, but that’s neither here nor there.
Nick comes back into her life right after their engagement and Karen finds that Freddy is neither dumb nor blind to the fact that Karen would much rather be with Nick. The only thing stopping her is Nick, of course. As Karen regularly calls Freddy Nick or flirts with Nick or tries to drive Nick and his wife apart, he stands silently by. Which is good, because Freddy’s only in it for the money, after all. And maybe the sex, but mostly the money.
Except when they actually get married and he tells her that he really loves her now in the elevator. Karen freaks out and an hour later, maybe less, they’re signing divorce papers and Freddy’s pissed. He says some hurtful things in front of Nick and she knows they are true and Nick knows they are true and later, Karen tells Nick as much. And then she kisses him, grateful to have his lips on her after all these years. Nick does not kiss her back and he leaves.
She is 32.
--
Karen loves a lot of things about Nick but one of her favorites is the fact that he thinks he can out drink her. She suggests grappa one night with a wicked smile and he rises to the challenge, just like she expects. What she doesn’t expect is his proposal, which he makes as he’s taking off her pants.
He seems just as surprised as she is by it but gets behind the idea immediately. He slides up her body to convince her of some of the selling points. Karen doesn’t really need Nick’s words to convince her it’s a good idea but she listens with a goofy smile as he describes how it’s going to be hard because of their different means in life and how young they are and she cuts him off with a kiss and agrees, it will be worth because they are meant to be together.
The next morning, Nick gets up really early and when he comes back to bed, he presents her with a small velvet box. Karen cries when he slides the ring on her finger.
She is 19.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Characters: Karen, Nick/Karen
Word Count: 1410
Disclaimer: Everything belongs to ABC. I’m just playing during the winter hiatus
Spoilers: up to 1x10, just to be safe
Summary: The first time Karen gets married, she is 21.
Author’s Note: Karen’s first marriage is inspired by the song Smoke Baby by Hawksley Workman. Her second husband is based loosely on Tony Romo because I think it’s hilarious he’s been linked to all these blonde stars in the media recently. I tried to keep the timeline and her marriages as close to canon as possible, using some of the nuggets of info we know but there are a lot of gaps and holes. Karen sort of fascinates me, especially in the way that she’s hopelessly in love with Nick and had him at one point - and yet, what happened? Here’s just a small part of one possible explanation. Hope you enjoy.
Looking back, looking back at me. I'm not how I used to be. Take me back, take me back into history. Diamond ring, tie me down, just like it used to be. Marry me? Marry me? Forever, and ever, and ever, and ever, ever - happily ever after. - Marry Me, No Doubt
The first time Karen gets married, she is 21. She’s known Scott for four months, three of which they spend engaged, and the ring feels all wrong on her finger.
Her father protests she’s too young, her mother simply asks if this is what she truly wants. They have a huge fight in Tripp’s study about it but Karen wins because, no matter what, she’s her Daddy’s little girl and Tish never had much of a backbone anyway. (It probably helps that Karen knows about Dutch, she’s the only one, and Tish says some hurtful things but Karen manages to silence her with a threat in her eyes.)
When her parents meet Scott’s parents, different people doesn’t even come close to explaining it. But Scott Senior and Tripp bond over a bottle of tequila and Tripp’s drunk when he walks her down the aisle. Karen doesn’t mind, thanks to her own alcohol and drug infused haze, and she doesn’t end up remembering much of the ceremony anyway.
Karen thinks she’s madly in love but later, Karen will realize that she was in love with the idea of Scott: his rocker lifestyle, his lower class British accent, and, most importantly, his glaringly obvious differences from Nick. Scott’s the drummer in a band that sounds a little like the Rolling Stones and parties just as hard. Nothing like idyllic and principled Nick.
Karen turns into the sort of person who lies around in dressing rooms, surrounded by alcohol bottles and lines of cocaine. Who stands outside the back of concert venues in her bra and panties, blowing cigarette smoke out in disaffected puffs. She and Scott have huge screaming matches and marathon make-up sex and when she looks at herself in the mirror, she thinks she wears too much eyeliner and she’s too thin. Karen blacks out regularly, doesn’t remember days on end, and hates herself every minute of it.
After a few months, Karen decides that she’s over this type of life. She leaves the tour and gets a divorce from Scott
She is still 21.
--
Karen’s 23 when she meets James McLaughlin at a club in Vegas on New Year’s Eve. She’s done with the drugs, having done enough during her brief marriage with Scott to last a lifetime, but she’s not done with alcohol and they get drunk enough to have sex in the bathroom at midnight. He’s the quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys, the star of the league, and Karen can’t help but feel proud that of all the girls at the club that night, he picked her. She goes to his playoff game a few weeks later and she couldn’t care less about football but she does likes the stir the magazines make over her appearance in a McLaughlin jersey.
She keeps going to Cowboys games and they keep winning, eventually becoming Super Bowl champs. When James kisses Karen after hoisting his MVP award, the picture makes the front page of the New York Post.
James meets Nick, just once. She’s with James at some huge art show in New York because James likes to pretend he’s cultural, so his fans think he’s more than football and a pretty face. Karen hasn’t seen Nick in a while, not since he and his dad had a big falling out, and when she spies him across the room, she freezes for a moment and feels her stomach bottom out. She pulls herself together enough to meet Nick’s intelligent wife, Lisa, who is an art collector for some gallery and Karen’s completely thrown by Lisa’s baby bump and how happy Nick looks.
That night, James proposes and Karen accepts, telling herself that James makes her just as happy as Nick did. The ring is expensive, bought with Gatorade endorsement money, and Karen finds herself wishing for the tiny diamond that was all Nick could afford.
She catches James with some blond starlet a year or two later. She throws the oversized ring at him and storms out of their apartment. As she boards a plane to go back to New York, something like relief settles inside of her.
She is 25.
--
Karen becomes the face of the Darling Family Foundation and, with the help of the Darling family accountant, invests most of her inheritance by the time she is 26. She’s on a better path now, she knows, and even if she made mistakes in getting married twice already, she can at least pride herself on still being friendly with her exes. She runs into Scott sometimes at parties (he’s got a Grammy under his belt and two stints in rehab, neither of which helped) and James occasionally makes appearances at fundraisers the Darlings host. It’s at one of the fundraisers that she meets Sebastian Fleet through a mutual friend.
He’s enthralls her immediately. Sebastian’s smarter than anyone she’s ever dated, even Nick, and he’s incredibly cultured (in the real way, not in the way James pretended to be). But she’s also the same old Karen and his body is really the crucial selling point. They’re dating seriously within a few weeks. Karen decides to disclose her full dating past, including Nick’s proposal, because she’s mature now but it turns out that talking about Nick’s proposal opens up old wounds and, according to Sebastian, drives a wedge between them. Of course, it doesn’t help that as an anthropologist, Sebastian’s gone a lot. Karen guesses that when he’s home, there’s some tension. She normally ignores it and coaxes him into bed. It’s much easier for everyone.
Sebastian knows that Karen doesn’t realize she’s simply trying to fill the void Nick left in her. The difference is, he can and after two years of pretty amicable marriage, they divorce on great terms.
She is 28.
--
Karen stays single for a good three years before she gets engaged to Freddy. He’s another athlete but she tells herself it’s a different kind of athlete, golf isn’t really a sport, and Freddy agrees to leave the PGA Tour for her. (She tolerated football, there’s no way she likes Freddy enough to tolerate golf.) He’s funny and cute and pretty good in bed - although, not as good as his caddy was that one time, but that’s neither here nor there.
Nick comes back into her life right after their engagement and Karen finds that Freddy is neither dumb nor blind to the fact that Karen would much rather be with Nick. The only thing stopping her is Nick, of course. As Karen regularly calls Freddy Nick or flirts with Nick or tries to drive Nick and his wife apart, he stands silently by. Which is good, because Freddy’s only in it for the money, after all. And maybe the sex, but mostly the money.
Except when they actually get married and he tells her that he really loves her now in the elevator. Karen freaks out and an hour later, maybe less, they’re signing divorce papers and Freddy’s pissed. He says some hurtful things in front of Nick and she knows they are true and Nick knows they are true and later, Karen tells Nick as much. And then she kisses him, grateful to have his lips on her after all these years. Nick does not kiss her back and he leaves.
She is 32.
--
Karen loves a lot of things about Nick but one of her favorites is the fact that he thinks he can out drink her. She suggests grappa one night with a wicked smile and he rises to the challenge, just like she expects. What she doesn’t expect is his proposal, which he makes as he’s taking off her pants.
He seems just as surprised as she is by it but gets behind the idea immediately. He slides up her body to convince her of some of the selling points. Karen doesn’t really need Nick’s words to convince her it’s a good idea but she listens with a goofy smile as he describes how it’s going to be hard because of their different means in life and how young they are and she cuts him off with a kiss and agrees, it will be worth because they are meant to be together.
The next morning, Nick gets up really early and when he comes back to bed, he presents her with a small velvet box. Karen cries when he slides the ring on her finger.
She is 19.