What is with this weather today.
Oh my word, OH MY WORD. This rain is insane. It's FRIDAY woohoo! Finally. I've been saying its friday for a couple days now, people are like NO! It's NOT! It's thursday you idiot. Hmm oK. My bad. jeez. So anyways, What's going on in everyone's weekend? I don't think I'm going anywhere for memorial, nope I'm not actually. I have work tonight and tomorrow morning but that's it. AUBRI'S BIRTHDAY WAS YESTERDAY! HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY SWEETHEART! Member, their was no time for me to give you your gift yesterday because it takes time, so tomorrow or wheneva you want it call me. Ya know, I decided it's unhealthy for me to talk about colby (no shit i know) but I just have a few words left. I'm looking possitive. Their was alot of shit in our relationship, alot having to do with muah, but I did learn alot from the kid. He had alot of spirit and personality in him. He always was there to say HEY your making yourself feel like shit, look at all the good things. I do miss him. Very very very much. And I didn't expect things to go this far, as to me drinking, him dumping me, him dating his ex girlfriend, as to me egging his house.... Let alone, kissing the girl. I'm sad. I want to be with him. But not like how we were. I want us to be the happy couple everyone wanted for themselves. I want us to trust eachother. I want him to realize from the day I screwed up I have been trying to make things right and I did come to love him and still do. He taught me love. He taught me to have gutts. Even though I did happen to cave. I think I've come a hell of a long ways and not him, nor anyone else can tell me other wise. When I get past all this shit I'm gonna be so strong, and so happy, and so free. I can't wait. Life does go on. And I'm learning that pretty quickly here too. I've always been back tracked and end up moving backwards than forwards. I haven't let life go on. And for once in a long time, I'm feeling it. Life does go on and if me and him have another chance down the road, and if we work out like I want us to then fuck yes! I would marry him in a heartbeat. But if things don't work out, then so be it. You can't keep trying the same thing and expect different results. He will move on. And so will I. I know he'll love me forever, and I'll love him back because baby love does not go away once you got it, you'll know. Oh and yeah, I've also learned Aaron will never know what that is. Colby says shit like "I think you still love Aaron and why won't you go back to aaron now!" First of all that's a dick thing to say. uh huh. The only thing that kid ever taught me how to do was to hate myself. So, FUCK AARON. And that is how I honestly feel. I screwed up with Colby. And I'm paying the consequences now. I'm anxious to see what this next year is going to be like. I'm graduating and moving and EVERYTHING is going to be different for me. So good luck to me and yep. lol a few words ey, turned into a fricken page. What's new. Alrighty then, Peace out kids.