curry
wow this is really the best summer ever. i am so glad it is friday night and i have nothing to do and no hopes for having any fun at all. yes this is really great. no im not being sarcastic.
i suppose i could go to the necking show at the woodser. at least cathy would be there. but i have a feeling its not worth it. and after last night im a little apprehensive about going all the way to williamsburg just to have a shitty time feel bad and come home.
last night was the first time i cried in a really really long time. sometimes i cry because my back hurts so fucking bad and sometimes ill cry when i think of cait and my mom, but its rare that cry anymore because of my current life.
i went to the woods show at monkeytown. i got there late and missed the bands. that place is too fucking weird. there were all these pseudo psychedelic types lounging on big white futons and watching some neon hippie film. it was as though they all thought they were the new factory or something. the only way i could imaging that place being cool is if i were on some very strong opiates. the place had terrible lighting and everyone was in costumes, i felt small and ugly and bounced within minutes of being there. skip was recording in williamsburg and said he would maybe meet me. but he didnt answer my calls so i headed towards the bridge to come home. i perched myself on the stone wall at the foot of the bridge and thought of what i could do to salvage my shitty night. i called lenny begging her to come home, she hates portland and i need her here. (lenny has not always been the best friend to me, in fact she drives me fucking crazy, but i miss her so much. she is my partner in crime and i hate new york without her.) its like i will now never live in denver because whats the point stephanies not there. dont get my wrong i miss and love lauren, courtney, hillary and carolyn like crazy but i couldnt imagine being happy in denver without stephanie. well its the same with lenny and sara here in new york. AND THEY ARE FUCKING TRADERS AND MOVED TO THE STUPID HIPPIE - ASS WEST COAST. after talking to lenny i mikee called me. he was in portland. ( i swear i am at war with the west coast for stealing everyone i love) talking to him and lenny made me realize how fucking lonely i am. i havent had fun in weeks. all i do is work, sleep and watch documentaries about the illuminati and the new world order with thoma and brian. seriously my only friends are thai curry, brian and thoma. and thai curry doesnt count as a friend because its food. and as much as i love brian and thoma its really fucking hard to hang out with a couple all the time when you are sad and lonely. and i think am becoming an extreme introvert from doing nothing but smoking grass at home and watching these computer documentaries every night. (not to mention that i feel alittle fucking crazy to watch hours upon hours of shows about the end of the world conspiracy theories and the origins of the human race in relation to astrology, aliens and ancient beliefes. (((check out michael tsarion. hes fucking great)))
at the base of the bridge is a colldesac were i was sitting feeling sorry for myself. i told mikee im not even excited about going to spain. im not. really why should i be. ive spent the last month being alone here in new york, and now im excepted to be excited about spending $2000 just so i can be sad and alone on a different continent. this is fucking sucks.
i hate the stupid west coast.
i hate team robespierre and their stupid tour.
i hate all my friends for leaving nyc or being flaky assholes here in ny.
i hate myself for not going away in july rather than in august.
i love brian and thoma and michael tsarion.
i love thai iced coffee and curry.
i suppose i could go to the necking show at the woodser. at least cathy would be there. but i have a feeling its not worth it. and after last night im a little apprehensive about going all the way to williamsburg just to have a shitty time feel bad and come home.
last night was the first time i cried in a really really long time. sometimes i cry because my back hurts so fucking bad and sometimes ill cry when i think of cait and my mom, but its rare that cry anymore because of my current life.
i went to the woods show at monkeytown. i got there late and missed the bands. that place is too fucking weird. there were all these pseudo psychedelic types lounging on big white futons and watching some neon hippie film. it was as though they all thought they were the new factory or something. the only way i could imaging that place being cool is if i were on some very strong opiates. the place had terrible lighting and everyone was in costumes, i felt small and ugly and bounced within minutes of being there. skip was recording in williamsburg and said he would maybe meet me. but he didnt answer my calls so i headed towards the bridge to come home. i perched myself on the stone wall at the foot of the bridge and thought of what i could do to salvage my shitty night. i called lenny begging her to come home, she hates portland and i need her here. (lenny has not always been the best friend to me, in fact she drives me fucking crazy, but i miss her so much. she is my partner in crime and i hate new york without her.) its like i will now never live in denver because whats the point stephanies not there. dont get my wrong i miss and love lauren, courtney, hillary and carolyn like crazy but i couldnt imagine being happy in denver without stephanie. well its the same with lenny and sara here in new york. AND THEY ARE FUCKING TRADERS AND MOVED TO THE STUPID HIPPIE - ASS WEST COAST. after talking to lenny i mikee called me. he was in portland. ( i swear i am at war with the west coast for stealing everyone i love) talking to him and lenny made me realize how fucking lonely i am. i havent had fun in weeks. all i do is work, sleep and watch documentaries about the illuminati and the new world order with thoma and brian. seriously my only friends are thai curry, brian and thoma. and thai curry doesnt count as a friend because its food. and as much as i love brian and thoma its really fucking hard to hang out with a couple all the time when you are sad and lonely. and i think am becoming an extreme introvert from doing nothing but smoking grass at home and watching these computer documentaries every night. (not to mention that i feel alittle fucking crazy to watch hours upon hours of shows about the end of the world conspiracy theories and the origins of the human race in relation to astrology, aliens and ancient beliefes. (((check out michael tsarion. hes fucking great)))
at the base of the bridge is a colldesac were i was sitting feeling sorry for myself. i told mikee im not even excited about going to spain. im not. really why should i be. ive spent the last month being alone here in new york, and now im excepted to be excited about spending $2000 just so i can be sad and alone on a different continent. this is fucking sucks.
i hate the stupid west coast.
i hate team robespierre and their stupid tour.
i hate all my friends for leaving nyc or being flaky assholes here in ny.
i hate myself for not going away in july rather than in august.
i love brian and thoma and michael tsarion.
i love thai iced coffee and curry.