stay beautiful baby....i hope you stay...
it feels good and bad to be home at the same time. ive been like dead sick and pretty much glued to my bed, but at least it happened here so that my mom can baby me and such cause that is always nice once in a while. im bummed i had to miss the ashton rose concert at the venue.....my friend dustin is in the band and he asked me to come support...i feel shitty....not just cause i feel sick but because i wasnt up to going.....on another note, our house is coming along quite nicely i was suprised. WE HAVE A NEW HOT TUB AND THE POOL IS ON ITS WAY! im officially stoked!! im gonna have a huge freakin pool!! but yeah, and i cant wait till the rest of the edition is done cause then im gonna have a new room. i love new rooms, decorating and painting and such is like a passion of mine.
gosh i miss robert.....so fuckin much, its horrible. it was so cute going in his room and seeing my picture and the paper i wrote for him on his wall and seeing my face on the background of his computer, it made me feel so loved, it was adorable, and just the way he took care of me while i was there. he is amazing. i just really hope we dont hurt eachother again....it just always seems to turn into one of those getting eachother back for stupid shit type things and trying to one up the other and then i just feel guilty and just yeah....BUT NOT THIS TIME...at least i really hope so.....i love him.
i dont know what to do with myself right now.....i feel a little bit better but i bet its gonna be just the same tomorrow...that just seems to keep happening.