(no subject)
I walked out on my family. Told them I didn't want to see them again. Agreed to let them cloak me so that I would no longer be a target, but that the price to this was that they had to stay away. I've never told any of them to stay away from me before. Even when Dad and I would fight, I never walked out on him.
I never thought it would be Vincent who I wanted to keep away from me. He's also been the one I ran too, not from, and it feels wrong to be this angry, this hurt, by the one person in my life that I could always count on. He doesn't seem to care that he's hurt me and Carly. He's so caught up in the underworld that he's forgotten that we used to really matter to him.
I can't help but wonder if the reason he kept an eye on me was because he was under orders to do so, or if he...
No. I can't do this. I can't spend all these hours going over every single event that has happened between us and dissecting it to see if he ever gave a shit. I know he loves me, but it's obvious he never liked me. I thought we were closer than brothers. That we were friends. Obviously I was wrong.
Lashing out at Carly wasn't fair. Because of the fight between Vince and me, she is the one who paid the price. She lost her freedom and I've been so consumed with how betrayed I feel, that I haven't even considered how much this is hurting her. I need to apologize to her.
I can push everyone else away, but I need my sister. I need to know that at least someone I believe in isn't going to let me down.
Fuck. I wish they'd hurry up with that damn cloaking spell. I just want to start fresh.
I never thought it would be Vincent who I wanted to keep away from me. He's also been the one I ran too, not from, and it feels wrong to be this angry, this hurt, by the one person in my life that I could always count on. He doesn't seem to care that he's hurt me and Carly. He's so caught up in the underworld that he's forgotten that we used to really matter to him.
I can't help but wonder if the reason he kept an eye on me was because he was under orders to do so, or if he...
No. I can't do this. I can't spend all these hours going over every single event that has happened between us and dissecting it to see if he ever gave a shit. I know he loves me, but it's obvious he never liked me. I thought we were closer than brothers. That we were friends. Obviously I was wrong.
Lashing out at Carly wasn't fair. Because of the fight between Vince and me, she is the one who paid the price. She lost her freedom and I've been so consumed with how betrayed I feel, that I haven't even considered how much this is hurting her. I need to apologize to her.
I can push everyone else away, but I need my sister. I need to know that at least someone I believe in isn't going to let me down.
Fuck. I wish they'd hurry up with that damn cloaking spell. I just want to start fresh.