every day i'm a little further off
Between two worlds.
I thought i might hang myself,
To see how dying would feel,
Anithesis of solipcism,
This cannot be real.
Everyone says I'm doing well. "Me? Well, I'm well, well I mean I'm in hell, well I still have my health, at least that's what they tell me. If wellness if this, what in hell's name is sickness?"
Three firsts and a 2.1. I must be a genius. Apparently. No, I'm stupid. You just haven't realised it yet. I'm not sure whether that's my problem or yours.
I've pointed out repeatedly that I can't even open tins.
I've given up telling people that I'm miserable. I'll just be told I''m adjusting. Or, that I need counselling. I need counselling like America needed Bush.
On another note, I've come to the realisation that i'll never be cool. Or attractive. It doesn't bother me too much but sometimes, I still wish that I was this fantastic, beautiful creature who everyone adored.
I miss Gary. I miss london. It's fine without me though. This is a practice run for my eventual suicide. It will happen one day. As I slowly drop off everyone's radar I begin to think it wouldn't be a catastrophe for anyone, except my parents and gary. And, to be cynical, they'll die.
Well, this was cheerful.
Merry Christmas
I thought i might hang myself,
To see how dying would feel,
Anithesis of solipcism,
This cannot be real.
Everyone says I'm doing well. "Me? Well, I'm well, well I mean I'm in hell, well I still have my health, at least that's what they tell me. If wellness if this, what in hell's name is sickness?"
Three firsts and a 2.1. I must be a genius. Apparently. No, I'm stupid. You just haven't realised it yet. I'm not sure whether that's my problem or yours.
I've pointed out repeatedly that I can't even open tins.
I've given up telling people that I'm miserable. I'll just be told I''m adjusting. Or, that I need counselling. I need counselling like America needed Bush.
On another note, I've come to the realisation that i'll never be cool. Or attractive. It doesn't bother me too much but sometimes, I still wish that I was this fantastic, beautiful creature who everyone adored.
I miss Gary. I miss london. It's fine without me though. This is a practice run for my eventual suicide. It will happen one day. As I slowly drop off everyone's radar I begin to think it wouldn't be a catastrophe for anyone, except my parents and gary. And, to be cynical, they'll die.
Well, this was cheerful.
Merry Christmas